Quote Originally Posted by Beetlegeuse View Post
Every time I go to bed with a woman who knows her way around a cock, I say a silent "thank you" to every man she slept with before me because virgins, as a rule, are shitty lays, and they need to get their training somewhere.

Give me a woman who swallows your load and makes you believe she's enjoying it, or can tell when it's exactly the right moment to shove her finger up your ass, any day.

I actually once dated a woman who probably had had more lovers than I've had haircuts. She invited me to go home with her for a weekend at her family's place to attend the wedding of one of her girl cousins.

Actually, the reason she invited me to that particular event was because I had my own airplane. She had a brother in the army who was stationed about a four-hour drive from their family home and he was on a 2-hour recall alert. They lived in a one-horse town that was a two-hour drive from the nearest commercial airport but it had its own small municipal airport. My airplane was fast enough that I could get him back to his post in 90 minutes so she asked me to be her escort to the wedding so her brother could attend, and I would be available to fly him back if the need arose. In return for which she promised delights beyond measure. I already had sampled her skill sets so I knew this was an offer that no sane straight man would refuse.

When we got to her folks' place and she started introducing me around, most of the women nodded knowingly and said, smiling, "Oh. So you're the roadkill of the month. So nice to meet you." So she even had that reputation among her own family!

She lived up to her end of the bargain. It was quite a memorable weekend. I would have submitted a detailed account of the weekend to Penthouse Letters but I figure they'd have put it in the fantasy section.

The affair lasted another three weeks, after which her family's prophecy came true. She discarded me and left my half-dead carcass in a heap of burning rubble with a broken heart, bruised ribs and most of the skin worn off my dick. But it was one hell of a goddam ride while it lasted.

Virgins? They barely know which hole so stick the stacking swivel in. I'll take a woman with a few conquests under her belt any day, thank you very much.
"So you're the roadkill of the month"

They were jealous man.