aka "JOB"
This is a problem when you mix religion with love! If you love her then no religious rules and customs should matter. All that matters is how you feel about one another! I keep saying this...I was married at 19 and will be celebrating 21 years soon. I have been through nearly every pitfall in a relationship that exists. In the end it's about how bad you want to make it work!
Member
Damn this conv is deep! Bro i gotta tell u I appreciate religion but the past is the past. Even more important it was before you and there is nothing you can do to change that. If anyrhing i'd appreciate the fact that she even told her biz. She was honest and thats whats up!!! She sounds wonderful and there are not
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Senior Member
Anyway guys i went there to the house about 3 hrs ago and she was still asleep so i woke her up and she hugged me and start crying and i told her im sorry and i loved her and i needed to take time off just so i can let it all off and not repeat it in future so i don't hurt you , she was like i dont care if u hurt me daily as long as im with u LOL crazy girl...
few guys said the fact that i should never leave my wife alone and she treat me amazing and i should never forget that . she was so happy and i was happy
she was like u pinky swear you will never let me go LOL 23 years old girl saying pinky swear and jumping . i love my wife
thank you guys. all of you for the great info. i was really happy some of the guys with greatest AAS knowledge commented and it meant alot for me
again you helped me just like helped me with recovery from low testosterone you helped me recover my relationship
i seriously love you guys
Member
Sent from my iPhone using ForumOriginally Posted by BIGGUNSWANTED
Member
Nice job brother!!!!
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aka "JOB"
Wonderful news and a great decision. Now spend every day making her happy...she will no doubt do the same! best of luck!
Knowledgeable Member
yeah you have good woman and sounds like she knows she has a great man and life. sorry about the mom thing. she is either trying to stick up for her daughter cause she hates seeing her daughter unhappy or she is one of those moms with nothing better to do the meddle in your life. you pick?
Member
My recomendation is to forgive her. ANd I mean FORGIVE her!!!! Be honest with each other on your emotions, as you said you dont want to pretend your over it and have it manifest into other fights due to your hurt feelings. Atleast she told you she had had sex. She didnt lie to hurt you she lied due to her own shame of the situation, and she didnt want to loose you over it. Humans make mistakes. Its so easy to put the one you love on a pedistal, but its your pedistal, not hers. Good luck mate
Senior Member
her mom Used to call and say i love you daily . it annoys me that she is always saying how are you guys doing, like now she is my wife. its kind of rude to receive a msg saying IM watching u dont hurt my veronica. Like she is my wife LOLyeah you have good woman and sounds like she knows she has a great man and life. sorry about the mom thing. she is either trying to stick up for her daughter cause she hates seeing her daughter unhappy or she is one of those moms with nothing better to do the meddle in your life. you pick?
and now she just yelled at me and called me racist which was weird!!! as im not racist , her daughter is my wife :/
i hated the fact that she blame me and throw everything on me like i was the one who did the mistake. and she keeps saying i raised her well and u hurt her and if u dont want her just leave
who the **** leaves right away!!! who leaves on his wife without talking or saying im upset
she wanted me to forgive the situation in 10 seconds and when i asked for 1-2 days to figure things out she said no u r hurting her leave her alone!!!!!!!
and she came out MY house ( she was with her ) and grabbed her while im hugging her and said veronica go in ....and YOU ( me ) i will deal with u later
WTF>.....bitch i came and apologized to her after only 1 day of being upset , i didnt even hurt her with words or anything1!!!
i have always respected her mom and because i respect her alot she thinks im weak maybe!
her son gf treat her like shit and cheated on her son and she treats that girl good... and im the one who pushed veronica back to school, work, church, quit drinking, quit smoking, exercise, and pushed her away from her bad friends IM THE BAD GUY SOMEHOW!!!!!!!
she isnt fair woman
she fought with me like im the one who did it.... i understand she saw her daughter in pain and its hard for her. but how is that my fault !!!
of course i have the right to be upset atleast for a while, im a human
anyway I told veronica , i dont want to see her mom ever again and when you want to see her you go to her house and see her, if she says HI to me i wont answer and she wont set foot in my house.
i know its too extreme but she drove me crazy. interfering in every single detail. then fight with her daughter and telling her she regret having her as daughter cuz she is bad girl then look at me and say how dare u make her cry , she is a great girl
****in crazy bitch
Senior Member
thank you so much for the beautiful words brother!
Senior Member
thank you lunk
you are the best
AR's Scrapple Lover
glad it worked out....but the choice wasnt hard at all u said she is the love of ur life and that there's no other like her....that solved ur dilemma right there imo....as been said before the past is the past....she didnt cheat on u she lied to protect yalls relationship...
good luck man
Senior Member
thank you . yeah it was kind of obvious
but me and EGO go hand in hand LOL
im hard headed and i got upset cuz i didnt know and felt like i was stabbed in the back
Yes i knew i willl forgive her but i needed my friends advice. you guys are my friends and like CO workers LOL
Female Member
You made the right decision in going back home, but it sounds like you need to think about things a bit before you jump to conclusions. Like you left your wife because you were hurt, and now you refuse to see her mother because she was trying to protect your wife. I do not believe that her mother dealt with the situation in the best way, she needs to realize that you are married to each other and step back a bit. However, you not welcoming your mother-in-law into your home may put distance between you and your wife. Maybe take some time to think about that before jumping to such an idea. I think that you should simply have your wife talk to her mother, let her know that she needs to back off just a little and you can all be happy again.
Just my 2 cents... good luck!
Senior Member
trust me i would love that to have good relationship with her mom and i thought we did. but just when that problem happened she turned on me like im a bad guy and started talking to me like im the bad guy....she did talk to her and she believes its my fault that i led her to that talk! she wants me to apologize. because she will never!!!!!!!!
how would i deal with that
i wont lose my respect over this. if she doesnt apologize i dont need her
her mom lets her brothers and her family whenever i yell at veronica. or even what veronica cooked today
or what did i bring for veronica
or if i bought new couch . like everything is under surveillance
its horrible really....
Last edited by Granovich; 01-12-2013 at 01:45 PM. Reason: more info :(
Female Member
It's a mothers nature to protect their daughter. With that said, she needs to realize that her daughter is a grown MARRIED woman and there are now boundaries. Her mother wanting you to apologize for something in her daughters past is none of her business (IMO), no matter how it came to air and if you led her into that talk or not.
If you feel that her mother is too involved, talk to Veronica, let her know. Just make sure that you are calm about it and listen to her side too. Working together I'm sure you can find a happy medium where she doesn't tell her mother too much info and you can feel like you have room to breathe and enjoy your wife.
Hang in there
aka "JOB"
Welcome to the wonderful world of in-laws! If you really like to challenge yourself...move in with them for a while lol.
It gets better but may take time. I cant imagine the man who marries my daughter will think he has won the lottery with me for a father in law lol
Banned for repping Dangerous Substances
Honestly and forgiveness is where it is at. I have found in 34 yrs of marriage that if you truly love one you will forgive. Be honest and talk things out. Don't sweep things under the carpet until it is OVER and forgiven from both
In-laws should be outside the couples home. Mons and dads are too one sided to their own. ...not so cray m
Last edited by crazy mike; 01-12-2013 at 02:25 PM.
Knowledgeable Member
Op-DSM was right about his post. You posted private thoughts of your wife on here. Not cool. Your thoughts a out you is fine. Its a trust thing. We get that your pissed but your also young talking to many guys who have a lot of life experience and this issue is a tiny tiny one to most of us in the big scheme of life. But its important to you and you are hurt so were expressing patiences to help you through this. Your doing fine, just take it a day at a time and focus on all this things you do have together. In all honesty who cares if she slept with 10 guys. She loves you she married you and is devoted to you. Forgive as kel said cause you may need her forgiveness one day. "The bridge you build now, may be the one you have to cross later".
Regarding the mother. Its going to have to be an open communication between you and your wife on how to handle her mother. And slowly you can pull away from her meddling in on your life. It will take more your wifes actions then yours.
Gearbox
ARs TOP DOG ~ MONITOR ~
She is only human she made a mistake and a guy took advantage of it.Be mad at him! When you walk on water send me a pic.Until that day I suggest You let her know everything is ok.she was a victim.
Knowledgeable Member
In regards to her mother and what she thinks about you she's not that I really long. You are the bad guy. You are the 1 that left, you are the 1 that got all upset overreacted about the situation.
I know it's very hard to admit when you're wrong and you did the right thing by going back hopefully telling her you're sorry for how you acted and not just letting her apologize and say how she wants to be with you. Remember it's not all about you.
ARs TOP DOG ~ MONITOR ~
No wonder its a mess in the middle east!Holyer than thou mentailty.
Member
bump^^^ i was taught to forgive and not judge!! guess thats what makes our worlds different!! i can sleep at night
Senior Member
What the **** is that suppose to mean ?
Senior Member
Im definitely not the mistaken one here. I dont know how you turned it on me
I knew something i didnt know before and TO me it was the biggest thing in my life and did hurt me alot
Maybe you dont
Care and consider it overreacting
But to me its very importsnt as its my wife . Everything in her life is important
And im responsible for her . If i left i had a reason
All i did was leaving for a day to understand things
I dont get to do that when im mad ?
Thats messed up thinking i was to blame
Senior Member
People are getting seriously disrespectful here!
Not judge when i dont know you. Its my wife im the only one who is entitled to jdge her
And i do forgive more than anyone
But there is things like honor
Not the honor that you know
Its honor of keeping women in your family safe ( mother,sister,wife)
Not let anyone talk about them or touch them or hurt them in any way
Physically or emotionally
Before or after marriage... Thats why we dont allow bf's things
Because that guy will touch/kiss girl who didmt
Marry her
What if he doesnt mary her !?
In my culture she is destroyed.
And thats not the wrong thing
YOU are the wrong here
Thats how life should work.... Not like here this woman slept with 9 guys but oh ok she is my wife now
Dude ur wife was a whore ... Do u understand ?
Sleep at night not judging anyone but everyone around u judging u and saying u have no honor
Anyway.
Knowledgeable Member
I'm quite sure you will NEVER admit fault to anything. Sounds like your culture has no room for self improvment and will stick with the way things were 1000 years ago. Why bother with evolving like the rest of the world?
You came to us asking for advice and opinions but you dont seem to be open to anything that does not fit into your little world and you are quick to put anyone down who does not agree with you or your actions.
Good luck and hopefully she will remain naive.
Senior Member
In my religion God says man is responsible for his wife and her actions.
I treat her great i dont need your input on it.
Alot of
Guys gave amazing help
And i thanked them
But some like yours are just horrible
As for " whore" my wife was 18 and did a mistake and the older guy used her
So she doesnt fall into that catagoty
Senior Member
In my religion God says man is responsible for his wife and her actions.
I treat her great i dont need your input on it.
Alot of
Guys gave amazing help
And i thanked them
But some like yours are just horrible
As for " whore" my wife was 18 and did a mistake and the older guy used her
So she doesnt fall into that catagoty
If evolving means everyone sleeping with everyone else with no marriage
Then i would love to stay un evolved.
At least i wont be commiting sins
Trust me your mentality is fvucked up not mine
Just because every thing got modern now doesnt mean we are whores sleeping with people and living with women with no marriage.
Its not about 1000 years ago or now
Thats how it suppose to work.
Again i came for advice from people who wants to realy help not just hurt and talk bullshit
And i got plenty of help.
Knowledgeable Member
Well if you change your mind you always have the option of taking her home and stoning her.
Obviously you have all the power and it's about your feelings.
Good luck
Senior Member
I wont answer your disrespectful racist comment
Thank you for wishing me good luck
Knowledgeable Member
Yup anyone who does not agree with you fully is disrespectful. LOL Talk about self absorbed and having a Prep Mentality or superiority complex.
My comment was racist???? how is that? Want me to show you some YouTube videos of it happening? it's factual, not racist. Again good luck and hopefully someday you will grow and learn there is more to life than just your opinion and that's OK also. The world would suck if everyone though the same way. How boring would that be?
Senior Member
First of im not a kid
And if growing up to be like u then i dont need it
Im not stupid i got a masters in chemical engineering from ivy league school at 23
And im the youngest senior engineer at the company i work for
So just cuz im muslim doesnt mean im not superior
I am superior to u for sure
Im religious person
God says no sex before marriage . Who the hell are you to disagree with that and have an opinion against it?
As for stonning you ignorant man
It happens when woman/man have sex with a person who arent married to while they are married
Which is cheating on marriage
If u look into holy books its there in all of them. If undont agree with it
Lets see how u will react when ur daughter have sex with men and get pregnant at 16 years old
Not my daughter
So again i am superior
Thank you and Good night
American Bedoo
Guess you are not interested in receiving advice from anyone who knows you're culture and religion.
American Bedoo
Stoning is outlawed in all but Iran, and it was used to punish/kill a woman or man who was caught cheating, which I may add is impossible cause it requires 4 witnesses.
American Bedoo
Dude, first of all you need to pump your brakes. I am a muslim and everyone on this board knows this. Your tone will not reflect on my position here and you will not make posts that make Islam look bad.
You're problem is not Islam, you're problem is your close minded culture that you want to mix with Islam and this is the problem with most of the Middle East. You need to take 4 deep breaths, and a huge step in reverse my man before you end you're membership here.
Islam is a religion of peace and you are showing nothing but agression. Stop being offensive and educate others on who you are and you're culture. Differentiate between Islam and you're culture. Do not mix them cause it offends me.
American Bedoo
Good luck
Knowledgeable Member
Yup you keep proving my point thinking you are better than others. Religion and education does not make you superior and especially not a better person. The more you go on the more you prove just the opposite.
Thanks for the clarification on the stoning. So is it only a good beating then if you want or think she deserves it for ???
Well my daughter is 19 and no kid yet so I guess you were wrong on that one, again.
Personally I dont think your religion (non specific) is doing you much good because all I see/read is anger and frustration. You keep verbally attacking anyone who does not agree with you. This is how wars are started by people who have no willingness to accept people for who they are. Everyone, including you have the right to your beliefs but no one has the right to condemn another for their beliefs.
You said more than once how it's YOUR job to protect the women in your life be it from physical or verbal attach but yet you have more than once attached others wife and no my child with insult? Very interesting double standard. I think you need to step back and take a hard look in the mirror. it's called being a hypocrite.
American Bedoo
DSM is right 120%, even you know he is right. WHy dont you go tell your arab family, or arab friends? I will tell you why you wont seek their advice. Because in your culture you are more embarrassed by this than anything and you feel disrespected and dont want anyone to know you have a problem at home, you want everything to look like a perfect relationship. I bet you even told youre wife to never speak of this to anyone didnt you? I will answer that too, its a yes.
You are mindless and the more I read this shlt and yes I am reading backwards I get more and more frustrated with you. I bet you come from Jordan, Syria, Lebanon or Iraq. If youre from Africa I will be super surprised except for Algeria.
Give up while you are ahead, I dont even wanna help you anymore. I feel like bashing honestly. you are Poor excuse for a man and a disgrace to Islam Mr. Religious.
American Bedoo
Everyone, please take my advice. Ignore this guy completely for the sake of argument. This has went from an advice seeking thread to a smear campaign about religion. Its bearing zero fruit and he is making himself look like a jackass.
Also my 3yo daughter knows more about Islam than this guy. if you wanna know about the religion she can skype you lol
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