Called thw police on my mom. Advice?

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 03:51 PM

Hey all

Right im gonna be 100% honest.

My mom is a heroin addict, right this moment she has a druggy friend round, and she is shouting, so much, like soooooo much shouting. she hasnt had a hit in a while so she is goin crazy. i can never sleep coz she is makin so much noise. i ask her to be quiet and she makes it into an arguement, and threatens to throw me out of the house.

im shaking right now coz i just called the police, said i was some guy walking my dog and i heard some major shouting from a woman in a house, number 3 (my house number)

should i feel bad. my heart is racing and i just wanna beat the **** out of something right now

**Sierra_Breeze** · 08-12-2004, 03:56 PM

Bless your heart hunny, I, wish you the best....

**Jef-El** · 08-12-2004, 03:56 PM

if you have tried to talk to her while she was sober(if ever?) and you didnt accomplish anything you did the right thing. Chances are the police wont do anything besides tell her to shut up. So long as there arent any drugs around.

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 03:58 PM

tryed to speak to her. she doesnt listen this has gone on for years

im shakin and so scared and angry, i cannot move out, i dont have the money im stuck in the situation.

i dont care if they make her shut up just for one night, i havent had a decent sleep in years

**damiongage** · 08-12-2004, 03:59 PM

Good luck bro. I have alot of very close friends hooked on thet ****. I know this cannot compare to your mom. If you need to talk, hit me up

**Jef-El** · 08-12-2004, 03:59 PM

dont be angry bro, calm yourself down.

have you ever tried some type of intervention?

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:00 PM

Originally Posted by Jef-El

dont be angry bro, calm yourself down.

have you ever tried some type of intervention?

what do u mean

**jbigdog69** · 08-12-2004, 04:02 PM

How old are you?? Get a job?? Get a roomate??? Get the fuk out???

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:03 PM

Originally Posted by jbigdog69

How old are you?? Get a job?? Get a roomate??? Get the fuk out???

cheers thats constructive.

want me to explain it? i have a job, i live with my lil bro, who i cannot leave in this house, i DO NOT have the cash to move out, get a two bedroom place, feed and support him, AND support myself. Im 19 by the way

**decadbal** · 08-12-2004, 04:08 PM

u need to seperate yourself from her, she will drown anyone shes around bro..

**radar1234** · 08-12-2004, 04:08 PM

police wont help.unfortunatly the only thing that will calm your mom down is another hit.its sad but its true.being rational with a dopesick person is impossible.i know from personal experience.i am a recovered heroin addict .i used pretty steady for about 4 years in and out of jail.been clean 5 years going on 6.i feel for you and your mom.the only way your mom will quit is when she wants to.only then will it stop.some never quit.

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:11 PM

police havent turned up so far. they are ****in ****. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh!

**OGPackin** · 08-12-2004, 04:12 PM

Bro i feel for ya!! Ur doing the right thing. If calling the police is going to start the process of ur mom getting help then u did what needed to be done!! Feel proud of urself u had the guts/nerve to do it! Dont be asshamed! Heroin is a horrible drug and even more horrible addiction. Stay strong for u and for ur little brother! We are here to support u in any way we can!! Good luck!

OG

**jbigdog69** · 08-12-2004, 04:12 PM

Originally Posted by MESSY_UK

cheers thats constructive.

want me to explain it? i have a job, i live with my lil bro, who i cannot leave in this house, i DO NOT have the cash to move out, get a two bedroom place, feed and support him, AND support myself. Im 19 by the way

Do they offer assistance...food stamps...assistance of any kind where you live??? My thoughts are about these drug delaers that are coming to your house Bro. What if they pull a gun or something and accidentally shoots your little brother. You have done the right thing. But now you have to take it a little further....find out about the assistance.

**SwoleCat** · 08-12-2004, 04:14 PM

Yeah, not to mention if your mom puts 2 and 2 together and realizes YOU called the police on her, she may very well just kick YOU out of the house.

I hope it gets better for you man, that's the truth.

~SC~

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:17 PM

Originally Posted by jbigdog69

Do they offer assistance...food stamps...assistance of any kind where you live??? My thoughts are about these drug delaers that are coming to your house Bro. What if they pull a gun or something and accidentally shoots your little brother. You have done the right thing. But now you have to take it a little further....find out about the assistance.

Just a bit of background, i live in the UK. Rare to find guns around my ends. my bro has just turned 18. they will offer support for under 18s not over.

my bro is staying at a friends tonight. im gonna go stay with a mate of mine

**OGPackin** · 08-12-2004, 04:18 PM

Originally Posted by radar1234

police wont help.unfortunatly the only thing that will calm your mom down is another hit.its sad but its true.being rational with a dopesick person is impossible.i know from personal experience.i am a recovered heroin addict .i used pretty steady for about 4 years in and out of jail.been clean 5 years going on 6.i feel for you and your mom.the only way your mom will quit is when she wants to.only then will it stop.some never quit.

The sad thing is ur absolutely right. Sometimes u need to take the first step for them into recovery and see what happens from there.

Again bro...good luck

OG

**Prime** · 08-12-2004, 04:19 PM

Can you get hold of social services? Try and get a council appointed flat for you and your brother? If your mother is an addict shell no doubt be dubbed unfit as a parent and youll get your lil bro out of the situation. I know that its easy for me to say this and doing it is many million times more difficult, but it may be something you might want to look into.

**symatech** · 08-12-2004, 04:20 PM

what about your father? Bro your mom will be pissed as hell when she finds out you called the cops, what you need to do though, is get her into rehab. If it takes calling the cops to do it then so be it. Your doing the right thing. She needs to get help, nobody in her situation is going to go get it themselves. Ive delt with **** like this before, I know its a **** hard thing to do but you have to get her into a clinic. Or get her arrested and they'll put her in a clinic. Im sorry you have to go through this, like I said ive seen it too, but its never gonna stop unless you step up. A large responsibility i know, but you'll always have support here. Good luck to you bro.

**jbigdog69** · 08-12-2004, 04:24 PM

Originally Posted by MESSY_UK

Just a bit of background, i live in the UK. Rare to find guns around my ends. my bro has just turned 18. they will offer support for under 18s not over.

my bro is staying at a friends tonight. im gonna go stay with a mate of mine

You need to stay clear of that crap!!! I hate to hear about situations like this. My father is a recovering alcoholic. So I know where you are coming from. I withstood many a beating when I was younger. When you are gone maybe she will wise up and seek help. Peace

Vet@ BigdogBodybuilding
Vet@ Anabolic Impact

**Sierra_Breeze** · 08-12-2004, 04:24 PM

Do you not have any other family who could help you two for a short time untill you and your brother could find a place of your own... you are both of legal age, and could manage on your own if you help each other... two incomes, a cheap apartment share a room or get a sofa with a bed in it... look into some kind of assistance for the time being, anything would be better than living in those suroundings... Again, bless your heart, and much luck to you all...

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:24 PM

there aint no way to force her to go to a clinic to my knowledge

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:27 PM

my dad lives a long way away, i dont wanna trouble him, he started a new family years ago when my mom and him broke up. since he has had kids, my mom went to jail when i was younger and i went to live with him, its was such a good life there, had everything i ever wanted or needed. but i couldnt cope. it was too much. so i demanded to go live with my mom again, thats after my dad spents £££££s in court tryin to get me. i ****ed him over. he forgives me. but i wont forgive myself. foolish

**jbigdog69** · 08-12-2004, 04:28 PM

Originally Posted by MESSY_UK

there aint no way to force her to go to a clinic to my knowledge

The only way to do that is to go to social services and they will comit her.

**jbigdog69** · 08-12-2004, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by MESSY_UK

my dad lives a long way away, i dont wanna trouble him, he started a new family years ago when my mom and him broke up. since he has had kids, my mom went to jail when i was younger and i went to live with him, its was such a good life there, had everything i ever wanted or needed. but i couldnt cope. it was too much. so i demanded to go live with my mom again, thats after my dad spents £££££s in court tryin to get me. i ****ed him over. he forgives me. but i wont forgive myself. foolish

Blood is thick Bro...and if he knew she was using again then maybe he would help!!!!

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:31 PM

social services wouldnt want to know as we are both over 18. and i dont wanna doubt you but im very sure they cannot KEEP you at one of these places. she has been on programs n stuff. they perscrie methadone to get you off it, but all duggys do is sell the meth and buy more heroin

**Elysium** · 08-12-2004, 04:31 PM

hey guys i gotta go friend on mine is here to pick me up. its 23:46pm uk time. police still aint here. i will fill u in when i get back in the morning

**Benches505** · 08-12-2004, 05:36 PM

Call your dad anyway Bro! You were young and I'm sure he does not hold it against you.I doubt he would view it as you bothering him and it seems you are his first born son anyway (always the favorite)

LM1332 · 08-12-2004, 06:09 PM

Call 911 on her tell them you are her son and she is a heroin addict flat out. If you dont have money govt will help you place her in rehab.

Originally Posted by MESSY_UK

tryed to speak to her. she doesnt listen this has gone on for years

im shakin and so scared and angry, i cannot move out, i dont have the money im stuck in the situation.

i dont care if they make her shut up just for one night, i havent had a decent sleep in years

**JDawg1536** · 08-12-2004, 10:19 PM

serious bro, call your dad, he sounds like a decent guy and if he is, he will help you out, at least for a little while. thats a ****ty situation, and i wish you the best of luck. remember we are all here to try and help you as well.

**Tock** · 08-13-2004, 09:52 AM

For sure, you'll be better off just about anywhere else. Your mom's addiction is doing terrible things to not only her, but serious damage to you and your brother, too, that will sooner or later adversely affect relationships with other people.

This is gonna be tough for you, but since your mom won't be able to look after you for a while, you are gonna have to step up to the plate and do what you have to do.
I don't know what the labor laws are over there, but you're gonna have to get a job to pay for food and shelter. Maybe you can find someone to share a flat, that would help.

Right offhand, I don't know what else to suggest . . . keep us informed, we are concerned for ya, and all of us are cheering you on. But for sure, you need to get away from your mom until she's sober and able to rise above her addiction. What she's doing to you right now is nothing short of abuse, and you need to get away from that. If there's nothing else available, maybe you and your brother could do a few years in the military. They'll abuse you there, but it'll be physical, not mental.
One other thing . . . speaking from experience (I'm 48), you'll most likely do ok for the short term, but there's a 99.9% chance that the emotional abuse you've suffered will sabotage your personal relationships in the future. So plan on having some long and difficult conversations with a counselor about this.

Keep in touch . . . you don't deserve any of this, and we're all sorry that you have to go through this crap. Nevertheless, we're all cheering for you, and want the best for you and your brother.

Best,

--Tock

**TheOak182** · 08-13-2004, 09:57 AM

Good Luck Bro! I hope everything gets sorted out...

**Steroids101** · 08-13-2004, 01:20 PM

I grew up in a similar situation bro... Its sad to say but most likley nothing will change your mom, I would work as hard as I could to get out of that place as fast as you can.

**Phillyboy1** · 08-13-2004, 02:20 PM

just call the cops and tell them the truth.

**Sierra_Breeze** · 08-13-2004, 10:09 PM

I'm just curious to know if you're doing okay hun?? I hope so...let us know please that you and your brother are ok.

**dannyisaacs** · 08-14-2004, 05:14 AM

dude i really feel for my dad is a recovering alcoholic. an i had all that shut of getting beat up an gettin kicked out plenty.i know how it feels dude. just hang in there until you can make enought cash to take you an your brother out ther. my older brother left an i thought he was betraying me by leaving me. dont leave your brother there it will kill him inside. but hey all is fine for me now. be strong dude.let us know how things go ok

**Elysium** · 08-14-2004, 05:52 AM

hey guys,

right well, its still ****. police never turned up, i hate the police so much. i stayed at a friends house and went to one of them 24 hour gyms, and did some boxing.

bro is ok, he stayed at a mates house, we are back now, she has calmed down. i cant say much right now i will post ltr