Always get some good answers here,

I’ve been with my girlfriend for about 4 years now, we live together, have a great relationship and it is just a matter of time before we are married. It is not toughly discussed or anything, or planned but both of us have the intentions that we will be together for the haul. We’ve done our finances together for a few years now, as long as we have lived together.

That seems to be the basic problem.

She is a server in a restaurant, brings home good money but is unsure what she wants to do. She is thinking of getting into cosmetics, but has really failed to push off to peruse her dreams. She is only 22, so I try to let her just find her way.

I’ve been buying/selling/investing in property (mostly rentals) for the last 3 years. I do great as far as building equity but despite what everyone things I’m not rolling in the dough. I do have some money left after all the payments are made from that and I work a full time and part time job. My pay is about 50% higher than hers.

The problem really is not money though. Its who pays the bills, keeps the books. I always try to get her to partner up with me on houses, and already am putting a house in her name. Problem is I can’t depend on her to do any of the books or even balance the check book. Basically I’m left with all the financial burden, from budgeting, planning for retirement and putting food on the table. I basicly make a living off my credit score and the 4 months I let her do the bills she did not pay one of my credit card bills for 60 days. End result? My credit score dropped by almost 200 pts and I could not get a line of credit to finish my latest project. I did not even find out until the bank told me after applying for the line of credit.

I love this girl, but she just lacks so much responsibility and ambition. I don’t expect her to carry the same enthusiasm as I do about everything, but I also do not expect to give her a free ride. I plan on being retired in my 30’s, but I don’t want to really do that with someone on my back.

Don’t get me wrong, if I was 37 financially set and I felt the same way but just met her recently, I would have no problems.

Really though I’m looking to build a life with her, not build one for myself and carry someone along.

I don’t know what I can do, I’ve tried helping her and I don’t think I could be any more encouraging. This message is the last resort before counseling, lol