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  1. #1
    tempbrit's Avatar
    tempbrit is offline Member
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    Test and Massages what a Mix

    Was feeling really sore and muscles needed some lovin, so I went to this local Legit Massage place this afternoon. Normally, I get worked on by this AA lady who makes Chewbacca look like a Pageant queen. However, she works the hell out of me and afterwards, I feel like new.

    Today made an appointment and when I got there, they said the Chewy had an emergency and that I needed to have someone else work on me or reschedule. Well already being completely nude and lying on the table in anticipation, I agreed to the replacement. Again, this is a totally legit place and the therapists who work here are usually ugly as sin.

    However, In walks in this caramel skinned hottie who had a body to die for that I have never seen before. She kind of makes me think about that girl who was in Mission Impossible with Tom Cruise (the one with the deadly virus). I can't remeber her name, but she had this sensual way about her similar to that girl and just smoking hot body and face. I had to think for a second to confirm that I was actually in the right place. This girl was simply beautiful.

    The manager of the place walked in and said that I was in for a special treat because this girl was new and was a true expert.

    I am kind of taken back with how hot she was. I really felt kind of dumb at first and laid back and closed my eyes and let her start working. Then she started to talk to me about what an incredible body I had. Thank you AAS. She had this voice that was simply EROTIC. Kind of like a Demi Moore voice. I open my eyes and look at her face and her body and could not believe myself.

    Well as you can imagine, next thing you know, my unit is about ready to explode and standing at full attention under the towel. Test can be really good or a complete pain in the ass. I am like waiting around looking for horses and clowns and sh*t to start entering and exiting this TENT that I have erected.

    Due to my cycle, I realize that there is simply no way in the world this thing is going away.....I am thinking "dead puppies" and about "banging Hilary Clinton"...basically anything gross at all, but nothing worked.

    This girl finally looks at me and asks me if she should be flattered or worried. I was glad she finally broke the tension and I apologized, and informed her that she should be clearly flattered. She said that it was really cute. (Not sure how I was suppose to take that at first).

    She worked on me for 30 minutes or more and it never went down. When it was time to roll over, she told me that my girlfriend was lucky to have a guy keep it up for such a long time. Again, totally embarrased. I also had to take some time before I could actually roll over with my unit in its current state.

    The massage was actually out of this world and at the end, I thanked her and apologized over and over. I asked her if I scared her off and told her that I was worried that she would not see me again as a client. She looked at me and said that she would be pissed if I did not come back and see her again.

    As I am walking out the door, I tip her $30 (Chewy is going to be pissed...normally only give chewy $20). She gave me her card (which is customary) and wrote on the back "Your cute... come see me again soon and lets figure out how to get together."

    About 15 seconds after arriving back at my office, I book an appointment with her on Wednesday. I am sure Chewbacca will be pissed. I have been with her for nearly 2 years. However, i must move on.

    Ever since the Test has kicked in, things with women have been going my way. I read somewhere that women know when guys have tons of testosterone and want to get with them. I am beginning to believe it.

    Gotta love the test!

  2. #2
    tonytone's Avatar
    tonytone is offline Anabolic Member
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    funny.....I'm sure same thing would have happened to me

  3. #3
    needmorestrength's Avatar
    needmorestrength is offline Anabolic Member
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    Awsome bro!! Guess those penis enlargement pills are working to eh lol

  4. #4
    chuck89gt5.0's Avatar
    chuck89gt5.0 is offline Senior Member
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    HAHA that is a GREAT story! Way to go man you should try to hook it up with her!

  5. #5
    TheDfromGC's Avatar
    TheDfromGC is offline Anabolic Member
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    no reason to hide ur feelings for a chewbacca looking woman by disguising her as a tan hottie...

  6. #6
    TheDfromGC's Avatar
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  7. #7
    needmorestrength's Avatar
    needmorestrength is offline Anabolic Member
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    LMFAO

  8. #8
    ReX357's Avatar
    ReX357 is offline "Toughest & Best Looking Guy Around Here"
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempbrit
    Was feeling really sore and muscles needed some lovin, so I went to this local Legit Massage place this afternoon. Normally, I get worked on by this AA lady who makes Chewbacca look like a Pageant queen. However, she works the hell out of me and afterwards, I feel like new.

    Today made an appointment and when I got there, they said the Chewy had an emergency and that I needed to have someone else work on me or reschedule. Well already being completely nude and lying on the table in anticipation, I agreed to the replacement. Again, this is a totally legit place and the therapists who work here are usually ugly as sin.

    However, In walks in this caramel skinned hottie who had a body to die for that I have never seen before. She kind of makes me think about that girl who was in Mission Impossible with Tom Cruise (the one with the deadly virus). I can't remeber her name, but she had this sensual way about her similar to that girl and just smoking hot body and face. I had to think for a second to confirm that I was actually in the right place. This girl was simply beautiful.

    The manager of the place walked in and said that I was in for a special treat because this girl was new and was a true expert.

    I am kind of taken back with how hot she was. I really felt kind of dumb at first and laid back and closed my eyes and let her start working. Then she started to talk to me about what an incredible body I had. Thank you AAS. She had this voice that was simply EROTIC. Kind of like a Demi Moore voice. I open my eyes and look at her face and her body and could not believe myself.

    Well as you can imagine, next thing you know, my unit is about ready to explode and standing at full attention under the towel. Test can be really good or a complete pain in the ass. I am like waiting around looking for horses and clowns and sh*t to start entering and exiting this TENT that I have erected.

    Due to my cycle, I realize that there is simply no way in the world this thing is going away.....I am thinking "dead puppies" and about "banging Hilary Clinton"...basically anything gross at all, but nothing worked.

    This girl finally looks at me and asks me if she should be flattered or worried. I was glad she finally broke the tension and I apologized, and informed her that she should be clearly flattered. She said that it was really cute. (Not sure how I was suppose to take that at first).

    She worked on me for 30 minutes or more and it never went down. When it was time to roll over, she told me that my girlfriend was lucky to have a guy keep it up for such a long time. Again, totally embarrased. I also had to take some time before I could actually roll over with my unit in its current state.

    The massage was actually out of this world and at the end, I thanked her and apologized over and over. I asked her if I scared her off and told her that I was worried that she would not see me again as a client. She looked at me and said that she would be pissed if I did not come back and see her again.

    As I am walking out the door, I tip her $30 (Chewy is going to be pissed...normally only give chewy $20). She gave me her card (which is customary) and wrote on the back "Your cute... come see me again soon and lets figure out how to get together."

    About 15 seconds after arriving back at my office, I book an appointment with her on Wednesday. I am sure Chewbacca will be pissed. I have been with her for nearly 2 years. However, i must move on.

    Ever since the Test has kicked in, things with women have been going my way. I read somewhere that women know when guys have tons of testosterone and want to get with them. I am beginning to believe it.

    Gotta love the test!
    ... and I have a 13 inch internet penis




    Just joking... Hope you had a great time. PM me her phone number so I can have an appointment too

  9. #9
    tempbrit's Avatar
    tempbrit is offline Member
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    At best my Internet penis might reach 6 inches.

  10. #10
    TheDfromGC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheDfromGC
    look at that sexy smile

  11. #11
    SwoleCat is offline AR Hall of Fame
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    Congrats bro, I believe you, and I hope you two have a great time when you hook up!



    ~SC~

  12. #12
    jimihendryx's Avatar
    jimihendryx is offline Associate Member
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    I think I read this same letter in Penthouse Fourums.

  13. #13
    tempbrit's Avatar
    tempbrit is offline Member
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    It is amazing what a little darkness can hide!

    Yes, unfortunately, my little vixen is not quite as hot as I had thought she was. I knew it was too good to be true. Especially considering my luck.

    I could not hold out until tomorrow. Had a break today and shot over to get a massage from this girl at Lunch. Well, when I arrive I see this girl walking in to the place and she has some seriously messed up legs. I mean the worst case of acne times 10. I grab the door after she enters and follow in behind her. The girl turns around and realize it is the girl from Yesterday and she smiles at me and says hi. As she smiles, I notice some serious Austin Powers style teeth. They are pretty straight and normal looking except for the color. I am thinking to myself, does this girl ever Brush.

    Ok, well now the whole bubble has burst. I mean this girl has legs, that I would not let my neighbors dog touch, has teeth that have not been seen by a dentist since the 80's. Yes, she does have a smoking body and if she keeps her mouth closed she is really attractive, but the negatives kind of kill the whole excitement.

    We do the massage thing and I control myself today. No more puppies were killed in my head today.

    She gave me her number and told me to call her.

    Reading this back, I can only imagine how vain I come across. I am comfortable with that....I guess.

    This sounds really really horrible to say, but she would be an awesome candidate for Extreme Makeovers. Seriously, if you fixed the stuff on her legs and she went to a dentist to get her teeth fixed, she would be a hottie. However, I have purchased 3 sets of boobs in my 37 years and I am currently not enjoying one of those purchased pairs. I am done investing.

    Continuing on with my shallow existence.....

  14. #14
    needmorestrength's Avatar
    needmorestrength is offline Anabolic Member
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    Lmfao.. Next time just purchase a set for yourself!! Beauty is only a light switch away!

  15. #15
    tempbrit's Avatar
    tempbrit is offline Member
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    Thanks NMS. I love your avatar.

  16. #16
    ReX357's Avatar
    ReX357 is offline "Toughest & Best Looking Guy Around Here"
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempbrit
    It is amazing what a little darkness can hide!

    Yes, unfortunately, my little vixen is not quite as hot as I had thought she was. I knew it was too good to be true. Especially considering my luck.

    I could not hold out until tomorrow. Had a break today and shot over to get a massage from this girl at Lunch. Well, when I arrive I see this girl walking in to the place and she has some seriously messed up legs. I mean the worst case of acne times 10. I grab the door after she enters and follow in behind her. The girl turns around and realize it is the girl from Yesterday and she smiles at me and says hi. As she smiles, I notice some serious Austin Powers style teeth. They are pretty straight and normal looking except for the color. I am thinking to myself, does this girl ever Brush.

    Ok, well now the whole bubble has burst. I mean this girl has legs, that I would not let my neighbors dog touch, has teeth that have not been seen by a dentist since the 80's. Yes, she does have a smoking body and if she keeps her mouth closed she is really attractive, but the negatives kind of kill the whole excitement.

    We do the massage thing and I control myself today. No more puppies were killed in my head today.

    She gave me her number and told me to call her.

    Reading this back, I can only imagine how vain I come across. I am comfortable with that....I guess.

    This sounds really really horrible to say, but she would be an awesome candidate for Extreme Makeovers. Seriously, if you fixed the stuff on her legs and she went to a dentist to get her teeth fixed, she would be a hottie. However, I have purchased 3 sets of boobs in my 37 years and I am currently not enjoying one of those purchased pairs. I am done investing.

    Continuing on with my shallow existence.....
    Sorry for you bro. When shit like that happens, it's often too good to be true. Oh well, you musta had one hell of a wanking session after that at least!


  17. #17
    kman's Avatar
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    Bro, I like your honesty. Funny thread. Don't give up on her, make some hints about how you are busy all week cause you have a dentsist appointment, and that you are obssed with clean teeth.
    Who knows she might just realize she needs a total makeover. Teeth whiten those teeth, give her some accutane, and put her on a low dose of var, and she might be good to go..

  18. #18
    Dally's Avatar
    Dally is offline The Dally Lama
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    dude, your honest


    BUT, you killed my whopper that I had vicariously grown from you first damn thread.

    you shoulda just left it and lied like everyone else here ...especially me and my 40 inch thick wang.


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