How Many Sex Toys Do You Have?????

[abstrack]

I need one of those

Ask Nark if you can borrow his?



???? That doesnt sound right

[CRUISECONTROL]

I remembered when i could whore 100 posts in a week...without breaking a sweat.

Those were the days

I average 31.76 per day!!!!!!!!!!! I posted over 600 in 4 days to get to 2000

[*Narkissos*]

No. Thats called your glory hole

So if someone theorectically sticks his dick into said hole in his mattress...and then proceeds to screw its stuffing out...that doesnt count as sex or weird does it?

[*Narkissos*]

lmao!

[CRUISECONTROL]

No. I understood you clear as day light. Been there. Done that. I know how to please a women so she has Amazing orgasms. The kind that make her legs shake and quiver. The kind that makes the emotional and cry. No need to toot my own horn, but toot toot

LOL brotha!!!!!!!!!!! toot toot

[abstrack]

So if someone theorectically sticks his dick into said hole in his mattress...and then proceeds to screw its stuffing out...that doesnt count as sex or weird does it?

Theoretically it does count as sex, but you have to name it and talk dirty to it at the time of intercourse. Saying things like "Yeah baby!" or "Take that shit!" counts also.

[CRUISECONTROL]

So if someone theorectically sticks his dick into said hole in his mattress...and then proceeds to screw its stuffing out...that doesnt count as sex or weird does it?

I feel for ya if you ever went deep enough and caught a spring in the mattress


Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh thats gotta hurt

[chest6]

So if someone theorectically sticks his dick into said hole in his mattress...and then proceeds to screw its stuffing out...that doesnt count as sex or weird does it?

LMAO..sure it counts..I just wouldnt go up to one of ur friends and be like oooo so tired after that crazy sex last night..

[CRUISECONTROL]

No. I understood you clear as day light. Been there. Done that. I know how to please a women so she has Amazing orgasms. The kind that make her legs shake and quiver. The kind that makes the emotional and cry. No need to toot my own horn, but toot toot

It can still get better than that!!!!!!!!!! Hell I know cause she told me

[*Narkissos*]

how would one theorectically instigate foreplay with said mattress?

Just laying on top is so unsexy

[*Narkissos*]

Ok here's a scenario for you sexperts.

You're at your girl's house...going to meet the parents for the first time.

They leave you in the sitting room on the sofa...not just any sofa...a patent leather sofa...what do you do?

[CRUISECONTROL]

how would one theorectically instigate foreplay with said mattress?

Just laying on top is so unsexy

Get creative and show her what your working with !!!!!! Just flip the bitch over and ram it in her off limits hole

[*Narkissos*]

Ok here's a scenario for you sexperts.

You're at your girl's house...going to meet the parents for the first time.

They leave you in the sitting room on the sofa...not just any sofa...a patent leather sofa...what do you do?

Would banging the sofa theorectically be bad?

What if it was done quietly?

[chest6]

hahaha you kill me nark..you proceed to take your knife out...cut a hole..and see how great that patent leather sofa is

[CRUISECONTROL]

Ok here's a scenario for you sexperts.

You're at your girl's house...going to meet the parents for the first time.

They leave you in the sitting room on the sofa...not just any sofa...a patent leather sofa...what do you do?

Go upstairs and bang the sister

[chest6]

Would banging the sofa theorectically be bad?

What if it was done quietly?

See you would have to know when everyone is coming back. If the gf came back..she would have to wait til the soma is done

[*Narkissos*]

so no one here's ever stuck their dick between the cushions of a sofa and bust a nut?

c'mon..next you'll be telling me you've never got head from a Vacuum Cleaner

[chest6]

so no one here's ever stuck their dick between the cushions of a sofa and bust a nut?

c'mon..next you'll be telling me you've never got head from a Vacuum Cleaner

or have your dick pierced! Who hasn't done that!?

[CRUISECONTROL]

It can still get better than that!!!!!!!!!! Hell I know cause she told me

I'm sure abstrack will get me back for this comment

[CRUISECONTROL]

so no one here's ever stuck their dick between the cushions of a sofa and bust a nut?

c'mon..next you'll be telling me you've never got head from a Vacuum Cleaner

I've done the first with a condom on but never tried the second

[*Narkissos*]

hahaha you kill me nark..you proceed to take your knife out...cut a hole..and see how great that patent leather sofa is

NOOOOOOO

blasphemy

Patent leather is just that...Patent

It must be respected.

First you tell it how sexy it is

Then you take your love-rod out...It'll be hard already...that's just how sexy Patent Leather is.

Spit on the tip and slide it home.

Go slowly...most likely it'll be her first time.

That's what i'd do...theorectically

[CRUISECONTROL]

or have your dick pierced! Who hasn't done that!?

Your boyfriend

[CRUISECONTROL]

NOOOOOOO

blasphemy

Patent leather is just that...Patent

It must be respected.

First you tell it how sexy it is

Then you take you loverod out...It'll be hard already...that's just how sexy Patent Leather is.

Spit on the tip and slide it home.

Go slowly...most likely it'll be her first time.

That's what i'd do...theorectically

Did you miss my reply

[*Narkissos*]

Did you miss my reply

I disregarded it.

What kinda sick fvck would leave a single; available; sofa...a curvy patent leather sofa...to go bang his GF's sister?

You're sick man...sick sick sick.

[CRUISECONTROL]

I'm goin to bed and taking my sex toys with me I'll talk at ya'll tommorow

[CRUISECONTROL]

I disregarded it.

What kinda sick fvck would leave a single; available; sofa...a curvy patent leather sofa...to go bang his GF's sister?

You're sick man...sick sick sick.

ROTMFFLMFAO

[*Narkissos*]

I'm going to bed mang.

I've got some patent leather poontang to go bang.

She's a little rough around the edges but in the inside she's all woman

[*Narkissos*]

I'm gonna try flipping her over like y'all said.

[CRUISECONTROL]

I'm going to bed mang.

I've got some patent leather poontang to go bang.

She's a little rough around the edges but in the inside she's all woman

Have a good time bruh, I'm gonna sleep on uh I mean with the couch tonight

[CRUISECONTROL]

I'm gonna try flipping her over like y'all said.

Ya'll nothin, that came from yours truely CC and let me know how she liked it tommorow

[Anna Bollick]

Go ahead be honest and tell all of AR how many sex toys you own

Girlfriend, I have a shrimp basket full! (That's about the size of a laundry basket) I/m not at home to count them, but that's probably about 20 or so.

Love
Anna

[CRUISECONTROL]

Girlfriend, I have a shrimp basket full! (That's about the size of a laundry basket) I/m not at home to count them, but that's probably about 20 or so.

Love
Anna

How did I already know that answer from you

[chest6]

HHAHAA i leave to make some good ol oatmeal and come back to laugh for 5 minutes

[abstrack]

I'm sure abstrack will get me back for this comment

LMAO shit head.

[chest6]

How did I already know that answer from you

oh come on cruise what is that...ill eat that sausage head right off

[chest6]

you know how i love sausage

[CRUISECONTROL]

LMAO shit head.

OMG Im literally almost pissing myself!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tooooooooooo much beer and not enough bathroom breaks and tooooooooooo funny of an avatar

[CRUISECONTROL]

oh come on cruise what is that...ill eat that sausage head right off

Dam I'm a sexy beast

[abstrack]

Mr. Hankey Poo


Hello boys and girls! Hooowww are you?

[CRUISECONTROL]

Am I George Castanza now with a sausage head