feeling ?empty? after the cycle

**anabolicshark** · 04-28-2007, 03:52 PM

i was on a 18week cycle
ethnate/deca
anavar

went from 218 to blown up 242 and then slimed to hard and fuller then almost ever 9bf 231,
all around training...
i am on my vacation now,off everything and i feel like a baloon, like i am hollow... went to the gym and still same strength.... but i look at my self and still look ok, but i feel like i am 200...
anyone ever had this? or is this juice messing with my brain?

ohh and i had a gyno problem, using nolvadex pain went away but bump is still kind of there, very very small -was never big- does it take longer then 2 weeks to go away?

**NotSmall** · 04-28-2007, 04:04 PM

Sounds like low test levels to me.

**Bojangles69** · 04-29-2007, 01:14 AM

I've heard (but not entirely sure) that once the gyno or tissue hardens than thats when it becomes permanent but I couldnt imagine only 2 weeks off cycle that it would be permanent.

About the "feel" like you "look" like anything. Thats mixing senses. Thats like saying I looked at myself and it sounded like I was happy.

So only because I'm a psych freak try and use words that are more congruent, not because I can't understand what your saying, because I do 100% but people usually do this so pathologically w/out understanding why and I think a lot of the time its because they're in denial about something or trying to hide from the truth.

So just say "I look like I weigh 200lbs." Or I FEEL ***ressed or w/e.
So you made gains but you don't feel like you did? and the scale says otherwise?

I'm trying to just decipher whether the roots are physical or psychological.

Did you feel hollow before the cycle?
Because hollow is just another word for ***ressed.
So if you DIDN'T feel ***ressed or hollow prior to the cycle and now you do thats completely normal imo and I think its just low test fvcking with your head like notsmall said.

Now the important thing is post cycle can *trigger ***ression but even once your test levels reach precycle/normal levels again you've psychologically tricked yourself or slipped into a pattern or new habit of thinking EVEN when biologically your 100% normal.

So I'd put it this way. Continue your PCT but realize your test levels WILL eventually rise back to normal and you need to understand this is 100% biological. Its ok to feel ***ressed or hollow, but you have to anchor the way you feel to the fact that this is NORMAL and will go away. My main point being is you need really internalize this is normal for some people. But certain people start having thoughts like "what happens if this doesnt go away?" And they start building a psychological pattern based on a biological pattern (ie: test levels being low) Than naturally your biological pattern returns to normal but the psychological pattern continues when it shouldn't.

So my main point being DO NOT exagerate, amplify or catastrophize the way you feel with irrational thoughts. If you feel ***ressed just keep telling yourself "ok Im feeling ***ressed these few weeks but this is normal and will go away" and stay away from irrational thoughts like "this is abnormal" or "what happens if I can't stop feeling like this?" or "im afraid ive permanently fvcked my brain up". Now I know I'm completely ranting right now but just realize its all in your mind. Accept it as a normal post cycle emotional phase your prone to going through, dont fight it in your head because thats when you start having those irrational thoughts and start forming anchors that wont go away when they're suppose too.

Be happy with the gains you've made, focus on postive thoughts, realize this is normal and in a month or 2 you will be back to how you felt before your cycle. Don't fall into a trap that you set for youself.

~Bo

***perfectbeast2001*** · 04-29-2007, 04:00 AM

what was your PCT protocol?

**goose** · 04-29-2007, 06:08 PM

Edited. Check your PMs.

BG · 04-29-2007, 06:23 PM

Edited. Check your PMs.

**Dangerdan** · 04-29-2007, 06:27 PM

I tend to feel like a 12 year old girl about weeks 3-5 after a cycle. Just down all the time and the smallest sh!t upsets me. It passes though. I'm gonna try pct without the clomid next time and see if it helps.

**LawMan018** · 04-29-2007, 09:57 PM

So why do I see a lot of people posting how they aren't going to take Clomid next time around... I thought it helped you... Does it do something else?

**anabolicshark** · 04-30-2007, 12:22 AM

wow...
1) i was just writing what came to my mind at the time... didn't really try to poeticly expalin myself...
but thanx anyways.. i guess
2) clomid doesnt help? i am on it...

12 year old girl is mature next to me at this time

i dont even feel my size, ( i dont fit in anything that i had before, i dont even fit in my bucket seats in my car... yet in my mind and when i look in the mirror i have an urge to do push ups pullups all the time since i really dont feel like i am 230...

***perfectbeast2001*** · 04-30-2007, 12:27 AM

still waiting on your pct protocol? what did you run?

**king6** · 04-30-2007, 05:37 AM

Originally Posted by anabolicshark

wow...
1) i was just writing what came to my mind at the time... didn't really try to poeticly expalin myself...
but thanx anyways.. i guess
2) clomid doesnt help? i am on it...

12 year old girl is mature next to me at this time

i dont even feel my size, ( i dont fit in anything that i had before, i dont even fit in my bucket seats in my car... yet in my mind and when i look in the mirror i have an urge to do push ups pullups all the time since i really dont feel like i am 230...

Clomid makes me feel emotional, last time I used it, it was bad. This time it is not so bad.

**K.Biz** · 04-30-2007, 06:52 PM

why are you using nolva to get rid of gyno???. hop on some letro bro. nolva will NOT get rid of gyno. ONLY letro will.

**Kristofer68ss** · 04-30-2007, 07:00 PM

one wise man told me.

While on, the user thinks he is bigger than he really is.

While off, the user thinks he is smaller than is really is.

my two cents.

**ebjack** · 04-30-2007, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by Kristofer68ss

one wise man told me.

While on, the user thinks he is bigger than he really is.

While off, the user thinks he is smaller than is really is.

my two cents.

that is pure gold

**maxex** · 04-30-2007, 08:11 PM

Originally Posted by K.Biz

why are you using nolva to get rid of gyno???. hop on some letro bro. nolva will NOT get rid of gyno. ONLY letro will.

It ***ends. Nolva knocks my gyno out every time within days. Everyone is different.

**mick-g** · 04-30-2007, 08:23 PM

If your pct has you crashed. I would try Holy Basil. It is an herb you can buy in capsule form at any local supplement store or online. It will help balance your cortisol levels. Also, do you run hcg with your deca cycle?? I would also do a short stint on hcg. Get a 5000IU amp and take 500IU 3 times a wk untill it is finished along with the Holy Basil. Do you supplement with saw palmetto, and zinc, extra vit-c. I use these all the time, reguardless if on or not, along with my multi-vits. You can also add some trib to the mix, but i personally haven't had luck with it, but some swear by it.