gym stories

**Schmidty** · 03-22-2008, 02:59 PM

Originally Posted by Tri26

We have a guy in our gym that no matter what exercise he is doing, he loads up until there is no more room for weights, Literally. On the leg press he puts 45 on the sides till no more will fit, then stacks dumbells on top of eachother on top of the machine then he does his presses...moving the bar just about a half inch in both directions. he does the same on the bench. loads it with 45s until there is no more room and then hoists it to lockout. then he raises his stomach off of the bench up to the bar. I have no idea how he does it...but the bar never moves. I couldnt even keep that much weight from crushing me but hey... to each his own.

**jaydub** · 03-22-2008, 03:21 PM

hmmmm.... i was getting started on chest day once. so i get the day going on inclime barbells right... nothing special yet, i load 185 on the bar and go sit on the bench for a few seconds, hit play on my mp3 player and when i sit back and lift the bar off the rack the left side friggin almost shoots straight up and out of my hands, the weight completely out of balance. luckily i catch it and get it back on the rack. i get up to see what the problem is, and ther's this guy behind the bench loading weights on a leg press, holding the 25 lb weight he just took from my bar... he just looks at me and freaks out and starts apologizing. how in the HELL are you gonna just take weights off a dude's bar? and when he's sitting right on the bench man?! i didn't know what to say..

**Schmidty** · 03-22-2008, 03:36 PM

Originally Posted by jaydub

hmmmm.... i was getting started on chest day once. so i get the day going on inclime barbells right... nothing special yet, i load 185 on the bar and go sit on the bench for a few seconds, hit play on my mp3 player and when i sit back and lift the bar off the rack the left side friggin almost shoots straight up and out of my hands, the weight completely out of balance. luckily i catch it and get it back on the rack. i get up to see what the problem is, and ther's this guy behind the bench loading weights on a leg press, holding the 25 lb weight he just took from my bar... he just looks at me and freaks out and starts apologizing. how in the HELL are you gonna just take weights off a dude's bar? and when he's sitting right on the bench man?! i didn't know what to say..

LOL WTF

**K.Biz** · 03-22-2008, 05:17 PM

Originally Posted by jaydub

hmmmm.... i was getting started on chest day once. so i get the day going on inclime barbells right... nothing special yet, i load 185 on the bar and go sit on the bench for a few seconds, hit play on my mp3 player and when i sit back and lift the bar off the rack the left side friggin almost shoots straight up and out of my hands, the weight completely out of balance. luckily i catch it and get it back on the rack. i get up to see what the problem is, and ther's this guy behind the bench loading weights on a leg press, holding the 25 lb weight he just took from my bar... he just looks at me and freaks out and starts apologizing. how in the HELL are you gonna just take weights off a dude's bar? and when he's sitting right on the bench man?! i didn't know what to say..

oh man thats classic!

**Ajc330** · 03-22-2008, 05:18 PM

omg hahaha

**thetank** · 03-22-2008, 05:29 PM

Originally Posted by CSAR

Another time at Gold's I wanted to use the hack squat machine, but a Japanese guy was already using it. So, I stretched out a bit and patiently waited until he was done...or so I thought. He grabbed all his stuff and left the gym area, so he was done doing hacks, right? Wrong!

He comes back in 10 minutes later and tells me to get off the hack because he's still using it. I said, "WTF? You've been gone for 10 minutes!" He replied, "I was taking a smoke break."

Come to find out that between every set, this guy goes over to the "Health Bar" inside Gold's (where they have a cigarette vending machine), has a smoke, then comes back in the gym area.

they sell cigarettes at golds gym?!?! what a ****in joke.
wicked stories btw. first one made me LOL.

**Thug Nasty** · 03-22-2008, 07:00 PM

hahahah good stories good stories

**scottythebody** · 03-22-2008, 07:28 PM

Originally Posted by Ajc330

Yosh!!!!!

Yosh is Japanese for yeah buddddyyyyyyy

**Diary of a Mad-man** · 03-22-2008, 07:43 PM

Yosh = Giter dun in Japanese.

One time I shit myself a little when I was on the leg press machine where you lay upside down and thrust. I was with a friend so I had to laugh, admit it, and walk to the bathroom to wipe my ass. Then I promptly left. Nice 15 minute workout.

Also, one time I was hitting heavy bag with MP3 player on, and I punched my headphone chord which ripped off of my ear (its one of those that grabs around your whole ear with the little curvey thing) and popped me in the eyeball so hard I had to stop what I was doing and hold my eye and ear like a little girl.

Now I'm just grasping at straws.

**CSAR** · 03-22-2008, 08:57 PM

Originally Posted by Tbone1975

Dude your stories are good LOL

Cheers, dude. I'm not even embellishing. Japan is a crazy place.

Originally Posted by Fordfan01

CSAR long time no see man. How u been?

Hey Ford, doing pretty good. Been travelling quite a bit looking at job prospects in other countries. How's school treating you?

Originally Posted by thetank

they sell cigarettes at golds gym?!?! what a ****in joke.
wicked stories btw. first one made me LOL.

Yeah, unfortunately cigarettes are sold and regulated by the government. Japan Tobacco (JT) actually promotes cigarettes as part of a healthy lifestyle and publishes research demonstrating that if you drink Japanese green tea, you won't get cancer from smoking. Anyhow, they do sell cigarettes at some gyms in Japan. It's crazy!

I got another East Tokyo Gold's story...bear with me.

They've got two Smith type machines in the back of the gym, near the aerobics studio. I liked the Flex brand one, especially for squats because the rails were angled and the machine was really smooth. So, I finish doing a set of squats and all these Japanese ladies come over to that area to wait for the next aerobics class to start. A lot of them throw their towels over the bars of the machines, some of them sit on the equipment while waiting, and one decides to lean against the side of the Flex that I'm using. Honestly, I didn't even see her there - when you get a bunch of Japanese ladies together and they go to chatting, it's like going to the pet store and being in the bird section with all that noisy chirping and squawking. You got to ignore all the noise or it'll drive you nuts.

Anyway, so I'm getting ready for my next set, I unlatch the bar, and proceed to squat down, when suddenly all these women start screaming at me, "Yamete! Abunai! Kiotsukete!" (Stop! It's dangerous! Look out!"). I quickly racked the weight and I'm like "What the fvck!?" Turns out the bar almost hit the woman on the head as she was leaning against the Flex machine. I thought they'd apologize and move away, but they were pissed at me. I got a stern lecture on gym safety from the manager...

**soulstealer** · 03-23-2008, 06:56 AM

Figured I'd share... theres this really weird guy that comes to my gym dudes something like 55 and it pisses me off because he takes over the leg extension and seated leg curl machines.... he does sets of something like a fkin 100 with literally no weight on and 2 seconds rest between reps and 5 minutes between sets while reading a paper and staring at people randomly...

I caught him staring at me one day with this goofy ass smile.... So I just threw a look at him like I wanted to kill him... so it doesnt look at me anymore anyway guy spends like 2 1/2 hours in the freaking gym doing this and then goes up stairs and proceeds to ride the bike.... at a slower pace then he just did legs.... and just stares at people.... I dont know WTF his deal is.... maybe he just figured a gym membership was cheaper then gay porn or something

**Ajc330** · 03-23-2008, 07:20 AM

bump!

**Chitown Raider** · 03-23-2008, 09:42 AM

Originally Posted by soulstealer

I dont know WTF his deal is.... maybe he just figured a gym membership was cheaper then gay porn or something

Maybe he's storing all his stares in the old memory bank for when he goes home

**hdrider135** · 03-24-2008, 02:00 AM

bump

**Lfs2shrt2bsml** · 03-24-2008, 02:51 AM

Originally Posted by Chitown Raider

Maybe he's storing all his stares in the old memory bank for when he goes home

haha in the old spank bank

**jbonez19** · 03-24-2008, 04:42 AM

Originally Posted by Diary of a Mad-man

Yosh = Giter dun in Japanese.

One time I shit myself a little when I was on the leg press machine where you lay upside down and thrust. I was with a friend so I had to laugh, admit it, and walk to the bathroom to wipe my ass. Then I promptly left. Nice 15 minute workout.

Also, one time I was hitting heavy bag with MP3 player on, and I punched my headphone chord which ripped off of my ear (its one of those that grabs around your whole ear with the little curvey thing) and popped me in the eyeball so hard I had to stop what I was doing and hold my eye and ear like a little girl.

Now I'm just grasping at straws.

bwahahaha. "popped me in the eyeball so hard"! ah, that's classic dude. i nearly shat myself lau***ng. haha good one.

**CSAR** · 03-26-2008, 06:48 AM

Another East Tokyo Gold's incident:

Last year these two guys (Yes, they were Japanese. All my funny stories involve Japanese guys.) in their mid-20s come in and are warming up with some incline dumbell presses. After getting warmed up, they strip off their tops and they're both wearing these customized Gold's tank tops. Customized, meaning they cut off almost all the fabric, so it looks like two strings hanging off their shoulders down to about their waistline...FRONT & BACK!! These guys were built like a couple of 12 year old boys.

After stripping down, they pull out a bottle of baby oil and start to rub each other's upper bodies with the stuff. The first guy grabs a pair of 40 pounders and does his first set. When he finishes, he drops the weights, gets up and strikes a "most muscular" pose. His buddy looks on and then he grabs the 40s and starts to do his first set, only he forgot to wipe off the bench first. So his sweat and oil are about to mix with his buddy's sweat and oil. He starts to slide off the right side of the bench while pushing the weight up and makes this "Dat....dat...dat..datdatdatdat!" noise. As he falls off the bench, he drops the right dumbell, and his buddy tries to grab the left dumbell. His ass lands on the dumbell he dropped and the other dumbell half-landed was half-caught on the left side of his body.

I had to bite down on my workout towel to keep from lau***ng out loud...

**novastepp** · 03-26-2008, 07:17 AM

Originally Posted by Tbone1975

That's actually pretty damn nuts LOL

yeah, they were a bunch of punks anyway. i'm at a better place now.

**tadpoleboyy** · 03-26-2008, 11:11 AM

one time i saw some highschoolers walk in, go straight to the bench, and load it up pretty heavy. By just looking at the kid, i knew he couldnt do that much. So after making a ton of weird pump up noise, he gets on the bench, with beanpole spotting him, gives one mighty lift, and drops the bar, right onto his teeth. Beanpole didnt even have a chance to catch it, and probably couldnt even if he did. So i start lau***ng, the dudes mouth is bleeding, and the leave, very quickly. Man, right in the teeth, that had to hurt. I still wonder if he busted any.

**DKU** · 03-26-2008, 03:34 PM

One day I was doing my regular thing, powdering my balls in the locker room, and this guy comes in and totally stares at me while I do it. Can't a guy powder his balls in peace?

JK

**CSAR** · 03-29-2008, 12:06 AM

Originally Posted by DKU

One day I was doing my regular thing, powdering my balls in the locker room, and this guy comes in and totally stares at me while I do it. Can't a guy powder his balls in peace?

JK

Heh heh heh heh. Good one.

**hdrider135** · 04-04-2008, 11:22 PM

bump

**TheArtist** · 04-05-2008, 12:10 AM

bump +2, damn there's some funny stuff in here... spicy feet, greasy japanese men... lol

Once, i was stretching w/ just the bench bar...(i like to take an extra, EXTRA wide grip to stretch out the pecs). anyway, i wasn't paying attention when i re-racked the bar, and only racked one side. the other side landed firmly on my face... and of course it had to bleed a little. Luckily it was just me and a few friends in there.

**wilson9d** · 04-05-2008, 09:27 PM

wow.

**Johnny_Rotten** · 04-06-2008, 12:14 AM

I was working out with my friend at the gym one day about 2 months ago & in comes this punk i always see in there.

I'm pretty sure he is in there everyday always doing barbell curls. dude is about 16-17, always wears the tiniest lil shorts & a string singlet & strands infront of the damn mirror doing his barbell curls & checking himself out with a really freaky look on his face. He also always gives the gals in there the dirtiest looks. You can tell they feel uincomftorbale around him haha.

Anyway we were there one day & he was doing his usuall barbell curls. Anyway my friend & i warm up then get straight to the deadlifts. Now this kid must of been adventerous that day because after we finished he walks over to the bars.

He then proceeds to load them up with 3 plates of 45 lbs on each side. My friend & i are staring at this guy in awe because he's about 115 pounds & has seriously 6 inch arms. Anyway he bends down,m gets this real determined look on his face then attempts to lift & lets rip of the biggest fart i've ever heard.

I'm pretty sure he shit himself too. But the fart alone was monstrous. It seriously was on the level of a shotgun blast.

Anyway, he stands up real slow then walks away real weird to the exit & i haven't seen him in there since.

I hope he wasn't hurt but honestly it was probaby the funbniest thing i've ever seen at the gym because that day there was heaps of hot gals doing cardio & they jus bust out lau***ng hahaha

**200byjune** · 04-06-2008, 01:25 AM

i cant stop lau***ng at that 1. i naild my head lai***ng.

but ya i was doing chest, on decline bench walk over to get a spot maybe 5 or 6 steps. the guy took off 25 on the right side i look at him and he stares at me with this dirty look. so while i walk over to get another 1 i stare at him the whole time intimidating him. this is no small dude proboly 6' 260. high bf but very muscular. like the way he looked at me pissed me off so he starts off and i guess i was in a dick move that day while hes doing the bench while i was walking back i bump into it. he had 315 on there. and he racks it and pushed me saying wtf is your problem, i act all inocent saying whats your problem if you dont like it here leave. he goes you jjust bumped the bar while im doing a set u coulve killed me. i say right and taking the weights off of my bar couldnt of done the same. they have moniters and they saw the guy take the weights off so they kleft at that time and didnt see me bump him, they yelled at the guy and told him to leave for the day. they said youve obviously been working out for ahwile why would you take the weight off of his bar. he replies becauses hes young and should have respect for elders. let me have the weight. so then i start swearing at him and i got kicked out for the day. that guy was just a scumbag.

**CSAR** · 04-06-2008, 07:13 AM

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Johnny Rotten, that is friggin' hilarious!!

**Juice_E** · 04-08-2008, 09:07 AM

geezus i'm in class lau***ng my @ss off lookin' like an idoit on the computer, damn you johnny

**BuffBuffalo** · 04-08-2008, 09:36 AM

Originally Posted by DKU

One day I was doing my regular thing, powdering my balls in the locker room, and this guy comes in and totally stares at me while I do it. Can't a guy powder his balls in peace?

JK

OMG man that's the funniest sh!t I've seen in a while!!!

**MFT81** · 04-08-2008, 10:09 AM

I watched a guy clock himself in the mouth with a 45 lb db during a failed incline bench attempt. He was a Huge Douche so it was a great moment.

We've got another douchey guy here who thinks its cool to stack no less than 6 45's on his chest to do swiss ball crunches.

**Armenian** · 05-27-2008, 12:14 PM

LOL Awesome thread.

Whats the issue with dudes who take a t-shirt, cut the arms off 5 times too big so the shirt is basically a rag going down the middle of their chest and walk around with their nipples hanging out WTF HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

KNOCK IT OFF!!!!!!

**calgarian** · 05-27-2008, 12:41 PM

Originally Posted by jaydub

hmmmm.... i was getting started on chest day once. so i get the day going on inclime barbells right... nothing special yet, i load 185 on the bar and go sit on the bench for a few seconds, hit play on my mp3 player and when i sit back and lift the bar off the rack the left side friggin almost shoots straight up and out of my hands, the weight completely out of balance. luckily i catch it and get it back on the rack. i get up to see what the problem is, and ther's this guy behind the bench loading weights on a leg press, holding the 25 lb weight he just took from my bar... he just looks at me and freaks out and starts apologizing. how in the HELL are you gonna just take weights off a dude's bar? and when he's sitting right on the bench man?! i didn't know what to say..

I laughed so hard I almost cried.......funny one.