Anyone ever feel like this?

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 07:47 PM

Ever wish you didnt have a girlfriend?
I mean I love my girlfriend don't get me wrong, but some stuff has happened in the past which I wont get into, but I just cant get those things out of my head.
We have so much in common and share alot of the same interrests and she is alot of fun to be around. Sometimes I think that I am just not the type to be in a relationship because I fall to hard for that person and when worry about something happening and it just makes me feel sick to my stomach.
who else is with me here?

**DSM4Life** · 10-12-2008, 07:56 PM

I wished i didn't have a girlfriend and it came true.

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 08:05 PM

haha yea well its the same for you, just with boys haha

**Amorphic** · 10-12-2008, 08:06 PM

ive felt that way before. i got rid of her and it kind of screwed me up for a while. ive gotten over all my issues now though and ive never felt better in my entire life.

relationships often make things so much more complicated than they need to be. just keep things in perspective and you'll make the right choices

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 08:13 PM

Originally Posted by Amorphic

ive felt that way before. i got rid of her and it kind of screwed me up for a while. ive gotten over all my issues now though and ive never felt better in my entire life.

relationships often make things so much more complicated than they need to be. just keep things in perspective and you'll make the right choices

yea I mean it would hurt really bad to break up with her, and I think we have a great relationship she doesnt want to break up...but I cant forget about the past and its in the back of my head that it will happen again.
I was friends with this girl for like 7 years and the past year we started dating. I guess the bottom line is I can't trust her, after the passed.

**DSM4Life** · 10-12-2008, 08:21 PM

Hard to forgive a cheater. I feel for you. Maybe professional help if you love her this much ? That or find a nice man to settle down with.....ok i think my first thought might suit you better.

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 08:32 PM

yeah, I know i should just break up with her and save myself from the heart ache in the future......i honestly don't know if I could handle doing that right now though

**Phate** · 10-12-2008, 08:33 PM

Originally Posted by beatango2008

yea I mean it would hurt really bad to break up with her, and I think we have a great relationship she doesnt want to break up...but I cant forget about the past and its in the back of my head that it will happen again.
I was friends with this girl for like 7 years and the past year we started dating. I guess the bottom line is I can't trust her, after the passed.

i understand completely, sounds like ya'll need to have a little talk so you can put your feelings out in the open and so that she knows that if she fvcks up again then it's over, then if she comes to a point where she has to decide to cheat or not, she knows that cheating will sacrifice your relationship and she will have to weigh whether it's worth it or not

it's a gamble but that's what i would do, just my opinion though

**stpete** · 10-12-2008, 08:33 PM

It's about now. And the future. Forget the past and be friends as best you can.

But i'm with you bro. I feel like i'm best by myself sometimes. And i have 2 kids.

Women are cool. Just make sure she feels the same about you as you do her.

**DSM4Life** · 10-12-2008, 08:34 PM

Originally Posted by beatango2008

yeah, I know i should just break up with her and save myself from the heart ache in the future......i honestly don't know if I could handle doing that right now though

Your not under the gun to do anything. Just take your time with it.

**Fordfan01** · 10-12-2008, 08:37 PM

Man i am pretty much going through the same thing u are right now...i feel ur pain

**Jfew44** · 10-12-2008, 10:12 PM

I feel what you're going through. I broke up with my girlfriend about 8 months ago, thinking it would be best for both of us. I've dated other girls and she's dated other guys, but I cant get her out of my head. I've been trying for a couple of months to get her back, but sometimes its just too late. Dont make the same mistake I did if you really care about her.

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 10:45 PM

Originally Posted by Jfew44

I feel what you're going through. I broke up with my girlfriend about 8 months ago, thinking it would be best for both of us. I've dated other girls and she's dated other guys, but I cant get her out of my head. I've been trying for a couple of months to get her back, but sometimes its just too late. Dont make the same mistake I did if you really care about her.

Thanks bro, I just got off the phone with her and she swore up and down that it would never happen again so I am going to give her one more chance and try and forget about the past.

**gst528i** · 10-12-2008, 10:58 PM

once a cheater always a cheater. I'll tell you one thing. Even if she never cheats the thoughts of her with another guy at the same coming home to you and putting on a two face is eventually going to kill it for you.
Save yourself the heartaches, headaches, rages, and trouble that going to come in the future with a potential to hurt even more than what you will have to face for a couple of months without her.
Just my opinion though.

**beatango2008** · 10-12-2008, 11:08 PM

Originally Posted by gst528i

once a cheater always a cheater. I'll tell you one thing. Even if she never cheats the thoughts of her with another guy at the same coming home to you and putting on a two face is eventually going to kill it for you.
Save yourself the heartaches, headaches, rages, and trouble that going to come in the future with a potential to hurt even more than what you will have to face for a couple of months without her.
Just my opinion though.

so you don't think peopl can change?
that is kinda what I thought to, but its really hard to lose someone you hold so close....

**Jfew44** · 10-12-2008, 11:17 PM

I disagree with gst. I believe that people can change. I am living proof of that. When I was younger I ran around and did some dumb things. Now, if I was with the one who I know I want to settle down with, the one who I broke up with, I would never even think about being with someone else. I have alot of respect for someone who can look past the past. It's about being with who you care about now. My advice is to just continue to show her how you feel. If she ever does anything like that again, she's out. Good luck tho bro.

**INM** · 10-12-2008, 11:48 PM

Originally Posted by gst528i

once a cheater always a cheater.

This statement is not true, I know people who cheated on their girlfriends/boyfriends but have not done it again although they've been with them for many years since they cheated. I'm one of them. Made a terrible mistake, involving alcohol and rec. drugs, don't really remember any of it, but as other said I was lying on my back almost passed out..

I told my girlfriend what happened.. and a year later what went around came around..

One year has passed since then and she is now currently traveling for 2 months and partying all the time with her girlfriends.. but still, despite our history I am not worried at all that she will cheat on me or hurt me again.

I love her, I like being with her, I can tell her everything and she wont judge me no matter what, she is my best friend (and I'm her best friend) but it really just comes down to two things for me:

If a person makes you feel better about yourself, she's worth having.
If a person doesn't make you feel better about yourself, you're better off without her.

Work it out, if you really like her give it time.. good things take time.

**gst528i** · 10-13-2008, 01:12 AM

Guess i stand corrected..... I still wouldn't be with someone who cheated... Just the thought of her pretending like she cares and all while she busy letting some guy nail her just seems alittle double standard. that to me a reflection of the person.

I THINK THE BIG QUESTION HERE IS, WILL YOU BE ABLE TO GET OVER IT. THIS MEANS NOT PUNISH HER IN THE FUTURE OR JUST GET MAD OUT THE BLUE BECOZ SOMETHING REMINDED YOU OF HER BUMPING UGLIES WITH ANOTHER DUDE.

**INM** · 10-13-2008, 02:40 AM

Originally Posted by gst528i

Guess i stand corrected....

please explain this..

**INM** · 10-13-2008, 02:43 AM

wow.. just read this again and man, haha.. havent slept for a day so my mind is not the best right now. I read "I guess I stand correct".

**CSAR** · 10-13-2008, 02:52 AM

Pretty sure we've all done stupid things in our younger days, but that's part of growing older and (hopefully) wiser. However...

Getting drunk in high school and peeing in your principal's mailbox is a dumb thing. Trying to roadsurf on a block of ice while being towed behind your friend's truck is a dumb thing. But cheating? That's an immoral thing. What was her excuse? "I'm so sorry! I got drunk, lost my balance, tripped, and ended up with my vagina on Chuck's penis. What a dumb thing to do!"

Just my 2 cents, but when you find someone who values loyalty and fidelity as much as you do, then that will be the woman worth keeping around.

**INM** · 10-13-2008, 03:01 AM

CSAR how about
"I woke up in a room with 3 of my friends, my ex girlfriend and another girl. The only thing I remember from the night before is that I was drinking heavily, smoking a lot of in*o and then I went out. 12 hours later I woke up in this room and got back to my hotel room. The thought of something sexual having occurred never even entered my mind, but a day later my ex girlfriend (which has been trying to ruin my relationship on purpose) told me that we f*cked. I asked the other people in the room and they all said no way, you were kinda passed out and didn't reply to anything we said to you.. although for like 5 seconds your ex got on top of you and we asked her what she was doing and she became awkward and said "NOTHING!" and got out of the room for a few minutes. And may I add, when I'm really drunk I can barely get my d*ck up when I really want to have sex with you, the girl I'm in love with, but according to her I was supposed to be rock hard and saying "screw *my girlfriends name*" and then having sex with her for more then 10 minutes without ANYONE in the room noticing it.."

**Ernst** · 10-13-2008, 03:26 AM

Everyone has their own code of honor. No one violates their own code of honor; it's impossible for them to do so. Their actions prove it.
It's not like she was tortured by the Viet Cong into betraying you and ultimately herself.
Wise up and find a good woman.

**JiGGaMaN** · 10-13-2008, 11:48 AM

wait, so your girlfriend cheated on you right? Thats not cool man.

**WARMachine** · 10-13-2008, 02:40 PM

Originally Posted by CSAR

Pretty sure we've all done stupid things in our younger days, but that's part of growing older and (hopefully) wiser. However...

Getting drunk in high school and peeing in your principal's mailbox is a dumb thing. Trying to roadsurf on a block of ice while being towed behind your friend's truck is a dumb thing. But cheating? That's an immoral thing. What was her excuse? "I'm so sorry! I got drunk, lost my balance, tripped, and ended up with my vagina on Chuck's penis. What a dumb thing to do!"

Just my 2 cents, but when you find someone who values loyalty and fidelity as much as you do, then that will be the woman worth keeping around.

We all pissed on my principals door once. It was funnier than shit...

and to you Beat, If you can forgive, then it sounds like you should give her another chance.

If you cannot stop thinking about this (Which im sure you cant, explaining why you posted a question about it on a AAS forum.) then you should cut your losses and let her go before she breaks your heart again.

A few things, did she tell you she cheated? Or did you find out through friends? Bust her in the act? Did she try to deny, or did she just come right out?

These things will tell a lot of the type of person she is.

Shes already down points for doing it in the first place.