Need help: Due Date, Weeks Pregnant, Date of conception?

**J-Dogg** · 06-18-2009, 03:12 PM

Well, you probably know the story based off the topic right?

Was with a girl, she has a kid. I sent in a DNA test to find out if I am the father or not. I want to sleep at night, and if I have a son, I want to be there for him. It sucks, she's with another guy, he has 2 kids, I'll pay child support out of my ass, I'll raise his 2 kids with the child support, pay his bills, but It's all I can do. My girlfriend I'm seeing, will stay at my side, but it will break the poor girls heart.

The facts:

Last date we had sex: March 21, 2008
Her due date: December 25, 2008
Date of birth: December 26, 2008

The time between the last time we had sex, and her due date is exactly 9 months and 5 days. Exactly 280 days, or 40 weeks. According to a 40 week pregnancy.

Date of conception calculators online, say the date of conception was March 29th to April 4th.

There was not much time between me and the next guy.

I should get DNA results back in the next week. Anyone familar with this? I love kids, want my own, but never like this. If I have a son, I want to see him when I come home every night, I want him to be excited cause Dad is finally home from work. I don't want to simpy get him every other weekend. She is a great mom, very caring, I give her credit for that, and a child belongs with a mother I feel. But I'm torn if this is my kid, I want to see him more than 2 days a week.

**sizerp** · 06-18-2009, 03:17 PM

Why are you just now getting a DNA test if the child was born like 6 months ago? Just curious. I mean either way, if you're the father or not, it's a bit late to do anything about it.

I know someone who has a bastard, and he lives in a different state, far away. Be glad you're close by. Also, on the upside. If you keep in touch with the kid as he/she grows up, and you see him only occasionally, you'll cherish the time more and probably become like really good friends with him... Not all fathers are friends.

**J-Dogg** · 06-18-2009, 03:22 PM

The first time I brought it up, it was post 20 weeks, so we could not get a DNA test prior to the birth.

After that, she was in court with the other guy, and disputing custody with him. Motivated by his parents, he's not interested in being a dad.

Based off the date of conception calculators, it's in his favor. Based off a 40 week term, mine, but either way....it's close.

He ended up backing out of the DNA test, last month, because he did not have $750 and is a broke bum.

I paid for one, I called the lab Wednesday, they confirmed they are running the test and it takes 3 to 5 days.

A lot of kids, look at weekend dads as a inconvenience. They spend 12 days running around with the kids in their mom's neighbor hood, they go to mom's school. When they visit dad 2 out of 14 days, it generally interferes with there camping trips, weekend games in the neighborhood and what not.

**warchild** · 06-18-2009, 03:36 PM

should have done the swab test after birth

**KatsMeow** · 06-18-2009, 03:47 PM

I doubt it's yours...

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:10 PM

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:11 PM

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:12 PM

**ni4ni** · 06-18-2009, 04:12 PM

Originally Posted by KatsMeow

I doubt it's yours...

x2...sorry bro, hope i'm wrong

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:13 PM

**ronan the barbarian** · 06-18-2009, 04:19 PM

a woman i worked with went through a similar thing.she was married but she had a ding dong with a geeza approx 9 months before the kid was born.
dates are a rough guide but not an exact science...try and keep a cool head and wait for results..
oh and if it is yours dont get mugged off for payments....do shopping for her or write cheques made out to certain stores,thats what my mates do to stop their exs getting p*ssed with their money.

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:20 PM

Cant you get custody if you're the father and you go to court...for custody??

**ronan the barbarian** · 06-18-2009, 04:27 PM

Originally Posted by ph34rsh4ck

Cant you get custody if you're the father and you go to court...for custody??

he said shes a good mother so its highly unlikely he would get the kid,in the UK even if shes a sh*t mother shes still more than likely to get the kid.

iv seen it a lot with my mates.moms with problems with drugs,alcohol,fighting,dumping kids no jobs or money and still get the kids.

check out fathers for justice or CSA.

**ph34rsh4ck** · 06-18-2009, 04:35 PM

Is he in the UK?

**Hoggage_54** · 06-18-2009, 04:39 PM

I think I may have banged her too..........

**ronan the barbarian** · 06-18-2009, 04:40 PM

im not sure,im just speaking about what i know and how it is here.

**J-Dogg** · 06-18-2009, 05:09 PM

Originally Posted by warchild28

should have done the swab test after birth

Should have shot Hitler at birth too, thanks for the tip.

**J-Dogg** · 06-18-2009, 05:11 PM

Originally Posted by ni4ni

x2...sorry bro, hope i'm wrong

It's a GOOD thing if it's not. I want kids, but not like this.

I don't want to come home to an empty house every night, while my son is being raised with a different family.

If I am the father, I'll do my best. If I'm not, close call, be safer next time.

**Tigershark** · 06-18-2009, 05:18 PM

Best of luck to you man. Hope your heart does not get broken.

**J-Dogg** · 06-18-2009, 08:13 PM

Originally Posted by ph34rsh4ck

Cant you get custody if you're the father and you go to court...for custody??

I can only get partial. She is a very loving mom, has a decent job, no drugs, or drinking, she does not smoke. The courts think the same way I do, a child needs the loving touch of a mother.

I don't want to take him away, but I don't want to be in a situation, that I'm trying to raise a kid I can't tuck in every night. I grew up with out a dad, so it's important to me to be there, to guide a son to make the right choices.

While she is a good mother, I don't think we could ever work things out either. I'm happy in the relationship I'm in and I don't plan on having a discussion with my girl until after I get the results. But having that talk, is going to break my girls heart. We were dating for 5 years, took 18 months off, and are back together. We have no kids together, then there is a chance I go and knock up a girl I dated for 2 months.

The idea, that the Mom's new boyfriend, and his family will get to see (if he's mine) my son more than I do, would be extremely frustrating to me.

I own a company that pulls in solid profits, I do really good with my career and have investment properties also. The way it looks, if he's mine. I won't see him, I'll pay to support a family that is not mine. They will raise a family in a real nice house, have nice cars, nice everything. She does not make much and her new guy has 2 kids and changes oil on cars....and they will live better than most of the town because of this.

But what really bothers me, is they will live like this, if the test come back with me the dad, and they will also raise the potential son 80% of the time, while I will get 20%, maybe.

**J-Dogg** · 06-19-2009, 09:02 AM

Congratulations J-Dogg......you are NOT the father!

Results came in this morning

**KatsMeow** · 06-19-2009, 09:12 AM

Originally Posted by J-Dogg

Congratulations J-Dogg......you are NOT the father!

Results came in this morning

congrats!

**scerpico22** · 06-19-2009, 09:37 AM

Congrats!

Now.....

**Dancer** · 06-19-2009, 09:48 AM

Originally Posted by J-Dogg

Congratulations J-Dogg......you are NOT the father!

Results came in this morning

Oh and some of this to her....

and some more to her

**vpchill** · 06-19-2009, 09:49 AM

Man that Sux. I hope it all works out bro.

**Pocketbattleship2B** · 06-19-2009, 10:44 AM

Dodged a bullet there man.

**J-Dogg** · 06-19-2009, 11:16 AM

I'm nice to her about it, or will be. She's working until this afternoon, and I'll tell her in person and give her the test, wish her the best and offer any condolences she feels she needs. Have nothing against the girl, I do have something against being a part time dad though.

Good girl, I'm a good guy, probably a good kid, but in this situation, it would be good for none of us. Worked out for the best.

I did not tell anyone about this, none of my friends or family, better belive I dodged a bullet today though. Lots of drinks tonight, have friends coming up from out of town. Drinks at the titty bar and unprotected sex with strippers at the after party!..... kidding