Tough love or mean

**quarry206** · 09-01-2009, 04:56 PM

I am currently over seas, as many of you know and we have talked about. here is a question I have based on a conversation that was part of today.

Myself and another male NCO had a talk with a lower enlisted Female. We both respect her as not only a person and soldier so we were trying to be helpful and respectful to her. But basically she has a husband that she married while on leave and he has not worked in five months nor tried to because he claims he "won't work at a gas station". So in the past few months though Even with the money she is making he has spent it all and put her into the negative. I merely said very nicely that If i were to lose my job, and be without a job. and took me working at a gas station during the day and taco bell at night to make sure my family was being takin care of I would do that. So IMO any man that is not willing to at least try to find a job because he thinks with the way the economy is he can only work at a gas station. that he isn't the type of man that will be there long term, nor the type of man she needs to be with. He will only bring her down. . . That you do what you need to do to live. having too much pride is a bad thing.

I felt bad because what I said made her cry.

Is that tough love or am I judging somebody and being mean ?

**Mooseman33** · 09-01-2009, 05:18 PM

truth hurts man...

good job.

**Undercover** · 09-01-2009, 05:27 PM

yeah, i agree. the only reason she cried is because she knows it's true. you should talk to her about it.

**CHAP** · 09-01-2009, 05:55 PM

Its really hard to know a situation. There is always to sides to a story. And usually both sides will exaggerate the truth without hearing both sides of the situation its really hard to know what is going on.

JMHO

**MuscleScience** · 09-01-2009, 05:59 PM

The Husband need to man the f^ck up. Not to harsh at all, if she doesnt put her foot down it will only get worse. Plus she is doing something most people cant do and trying to make it in life. Being a soldier is not easy, I have much respect for what you all do.

**c-Z** · 09-01-2009, 06:07 PM

Originally Posted by MuscleScience

The Husband need to man the f^ck up. Not to harsh at all, if she doesnt put her foot down it will only get worse. Plus she is doing something most people cant do and trying to make it in life. Being a soldier is not easy, I have much respect for what you all do.

AMEN. MAN THE F*CK UP! Thats a joke. money is money... who cares if he is pumping gas..

**Undercover** · 09-01-2009, 06:15 PM

The french said it best.

"There is no stupid work, there are only stupid people."

**Immortal Soldier** · 09-01-2009, 06:31 PM

He could always become a cop....lol u only need a high school diploma for that.

**DSM4Life** · 09-01-2009, 06:34 PM

Originally Posted by quarry206

I am currently over seas, as many of you know and we have talked about. here is a question I have based on a conversation that was part of today.

Myself and another male NCO had a talk with a lower enlisted Female. We both respect her as not only a person and soldier so we were trying to be helpful and respectful to her. But basically she has a husband that she married while on leave and he has not worked in five months nor tried to because he claims he "won't work at a gas station". So in the past few months though Even with the money she is making he has spent it all and put her into the negative. I merely said very nicely that If i were to lose my job, and be without a job. and took me working at a gas station during the day and taco bell at night to make sure my family was being takin care of I would do that. So IMO any man that is not willing to at least try to find a job because he thinks with the way the economy is he can only work at a gas station. that he isn't the type of man that will be there long term, nor the type of man she needs to be with. He will only bring her down. . . That you do what you need to do to live. having too much pride is a bad thing.

I felt bad because what I said made her cry.

Is that tough love or am I judging somebody and being mean ?

If you and your squad tagged-teamed her it might help make her feel better...just a thought.

**MuscleScience** · 09-01-2009, 06:39 PM

Originally Posted by Undercover

The french said it best.

"There is no stupid work, there are only stupid people."

The French also say this the best.

Run!!!

hahahaha

**westco28** · 09-01-2009, 06:46 PM

the guys a turd you did the right thing. he needs to man up and do what ever it takes to bring in his share. had to wash dishes once in my younger days but i fed my kids

**stpete** · 09-01-2009, 06:49 PM

I think you did the right thing. And as mentioned, the truth hurts. You would only be pissed at yourself if you didn't.

**Misery13** · 09-01-2009, 07:40 PM

Originally Posted by Undercover

yeah, i agree. the only reason she cried is because she knows it's true. you should talk to her about it.

I agree...

**xlxBigSexyxlx** · 09-01-2009, 07:45 PM

good job saying it.
Some money is no money, especially when you start going negative.

He needs to man the **** up, and she needs to be a little more outspoken to him.

**sizerp** · 09-01-2009, 11:11 PM

Nah man, I think that's total crap. Who the hell knows what he said to her? This info is from a third party. And I bet that 100% of you wouldn't work at a gas station OR taco bell. So why don't you just STFU and mind your own god-damn business.

I am not saying that I wouldn't do whatever it takes to help my family, but does she have kids? Does she have an ill family member who desperately needs the support? I didn't hear anything of the nature.

You really don't know how other people live their lives, and maybe he's searching for a job because he has 30 years exp in the business world or some shit. Either way, I don't agree with him spending all her cash but seriously... why do you pry in other people's lives, then post about it?

Obviously you have some unstable feeling in regards to what you said... you made her cry... ahh well, the world is ending.

If you have feelings for her that's one thing, if no than why even judge someone you haven't met? Kinda rude IMO, and it's people like you who piss me the **** off. Get a life.