Likely getting divorced...

[40plusnewbie]

I'm no prince charming, I have my faults, but I own up to them and work towards changing them.

My wife seems to think she is perfect and any time she does anything wrong she blames me. i.e. I say something that 'makes her mad' (can be some stupid mundane thing) and she goes off for 1/2 hour yelling about everything under the sun and then tells me it was my fault because I made her mad. Se doesn't seem to grasp the concept that we are all responsible for our own behavior, and the only time an adult should be screaming is like if they are being chased by a rapist or something.....

Due to the religion I was raised under I put off the notion of getting divorced, we have been together 7 yrs and married 5, my first and only exclusive relationship. Hell, I'll tell you, it sure is a blow back to see how people change after they get married.

Counseling isn't an option b/c, like I said, she see's anything she does 'wrong' as coming from something I did wrong, regardless of how small. Arguments are getting worse, particularly since I basically stopped participating in them, remaining calm and trying to calmly and quietly talk her down.

Since I have become recently reinvigorated with the desire to work out and build my body, now that I am done with PT eating clean, working out regularly, and telling my wife well in advance I am going on a steroid cycle, things she was all initially cool with. Well tonight she tells me she is throwing away all my steroids /gear making supplies, etc "because they mess up my head" (excuse, i have done one anavar cycle more than a yr ago and she didn't even know).

I have had so many crisis and set backs over the past year, did my best to fight through them, endured my marital difficulties and tried to help my wife improve, and I finally get a positive mindset on eating clean, working my body, and doing a cycle to make myself feel good... and she tells me she is going to step on it.

My wife wants a 'trial separation'. I explained this will not work until she gains insight into her own acting out, takes responsibility for her own actions (and without saying it, basically stops acting like the worlds most selfish bitch, at least to me).

I'm now deciding whether or not I am going to stay local in MA, which I likely will at least until 10/1 when I will pick up 3 weeks vacation pay, and then stay on with the co I have been with for 15 yrs, or make a completely impulsive move to either Las Vegas (I used to be a semi-pro poker player online and the biggest and most fish are in Las Vegas) or to Miami Beach, simply because I LOVE it there.

So I went from feeling like a 10 last night to feeling like a zero tonight after the convo with my wife. I know this won't change. I guess I picked the wrong woman, likely because I had no experience in long term relationships.

I'm at a crossroads and not sure what will happen, what I will do. My motivation is shit today. I don't know if I will be able to break free from the psychological prob's until I break free from my wife, unfortunately all my money is tied up so I am stuck living with her for the next cpl of months.

I'm gonna do my brew at a hotel this weekend, hopefully she doesn't destroy all my shit before then....


Sometimes like sucks...........

[Igifuno]

Man hang in there. Marriages has their ups and downs and, unfortunately, sometimes they end and you go your separate ways. Marriage is about giving and if you've run into a roadblock and you're not getting anything out of it then maybe its for the best, but either way its going to suck.

Is there something in particular that she is so angry about to make her want to make you miserable? Also, get your gear and hide it before she carries out what she said she would do.

[stevey_6t9]

if your not happy and have exhausted all pathways then get out.

[SEAviator]

divorce, never look back, but dont get re married!!!

[Hoggage_54]

congrats

[StangLaw]

That sucks man, im sorry. Relationships in general are give and take, much less marriage. If one stops giving, someones leaving...

[JinNtonic]

Sounds like no kids involved. I would show her the door with an attitude like that.

[40plusnewbie]

Thanks for the support. And yes, only giving on my side. The only thing I can think that I have "done to her" is that she might think that since, even though I am older than her (43 vs 35) ppl think I'm like 10 years younger. Now put 40-60 lbs of muscle on that frame and take of 12 lb's of fat and in 10 years she might be afraid I will dump her for an older women. All her friends tell her how handsome I am (her native language is Portuguese, from Brazil) and when a new friend meets me they tell her some version of that in Portuguese and she translates for me. With the muscle..... maybe she's scared. She constantly tries to sabotage my diet by buying ice cream, etc, etc, etc


But she has slowly evolved this way over time, over our marriage. I now tell her nothing I ever do will be good enough for you, will it? She grew up without a father and I think she has 1. the expectation of perfection from the male in her life, 2. resentment for never having a dad. No matter what changes I make in my life or what I do she always has another thing to complain about that I am doing wrong.

Like I said, I have my faults, (nothing dramatic, I don't hit her or scream at her and shit) but I work on them. She blames all her wrong actions on me. I"m sick of it.

The real question is am I/we gonna last until our lease is up, or is something gonna blow (I called the cops on her before because she would threaten to call the cops on me on a few occasions when I was doing nothing but not complying with her wishes- her implication "I will call the cops and make up a story so they haul u off in cuffs". One day I knew she was gonna do this so called the cops first to ask for advice, then put their number on speed dial. She came home and said "I'm gonna call my brother and have him call the cops" (after yelling and blasting the radio and shit). I hit speed dial and told the cops my wife was out of control and the threat she made and that I did not feel safe. They asked why I said I don't know what she might do next, I don't feel safe, I need help." The f'in cops still made ME go outside when they separated us despite me protesting and saying I made the call and called 1/2 hour earlier and it is on tape. That's the last time she pulled that stunt but not the last time she acted up, that's for sure.

There can be no 'one thing' she hates me for. And she's not exactly the type to lie back on the couch and share her feelings. She grew up in a 3rd world country.

[lovbyts]

What country was that? It makes a difference. I have some experience with Asian culture if that is where she is from. It has helped a few I know in the past.

If you want to try to save things get into counseling even if you don't think it will help and tell her you understand it's your fault but you need a 3rd party to help. They will tell you or her straight up if they are any good. I did this with the 2nd wife and the counselor told her in not so many words she was fvcking up.

[Big]

regardless of the circumstances splitting up is never easy. stay strong.

[auslifta]

Thanks for the support. And yes, only giving on my side. The only thing I can think that I have "done to her" is that she might think that since, even though I am older than her (43 vs 35) ppl think I'm like 10 years younger. Now put 40-60 lbs of muscle on that frame and take of 12 lb's of fat and in 10 years she might be afraid I will dump her for an older women. All her friends tell her how handsome I am (her native language is Portuguese, from Brazil) and when a new friend meets me they tell her some version of that in Portuguese and she translates for me. With the muscle..... maybe she's scared. She constantly tries to sabotage my diet by buying ice cream, etc, etc, etc


But she has slowly evolved this way over time, over our marriage. I now tell her nothing I ever do will be good enough for you, will it? She grew up without a father and I think she has 1. the expectation of perfection from the male in her life, 2. resentment for never having a dad. No matter what changes I make in my life or what I do she always has another thing to complain about that I am doing wrong.

Like I said, I have my faults, (nothing dramatic, I don't hit her or scream at her and shit) but I work on them. She blames all her wrong actions on me. I"m sick of it.

The real question is am I/we gonna last until our lease is up, or is something gonna blow (I called the cops on her before because she would threaten to call the cops on me on a few occasions when I was doing nothing but not complying with her wishes- her implication "I will call the cops and make up a story so they haul u off in cuffs". One day I knew she was gonna do this so called the cops first to ask for advice, then put their number on speed dial. She came home and said "I'm gonna call my brother and have him call the cops" (after yelling and blasting the radio and shit). I hit speed dial and told the cops my wife was out of control and the threat she made and that I did not feel safe. They asked why I said I don't know what she might do next, I don't feel safe, I need help." The f'in cops still made ME go outside when they separated us despite me protesting and saying I made the call and called 1/2 hour earlier and it is on tape. That's the last time she pulled that stunt but not the last time she acted up, that's for sure.

There can be no 'one thing' she hates me for. And she's not exactly the type to lie back on the couch and share her feelings. She grew up in a 3rd world country.

I scanned over your post's and this stood out. I can spealk from experience-these women have a lot of difficulties with relationships.

[Ulysses]

I had a similar experience dude. My wifes father abandoned her when she was ten and it was like a ticking bomb that exploded in here head after 20 years of very happy marriage and she just walked. Having a father abandon you just screws your head man. My own father buggered off when I was 5 and I never saw him again so I know! Now I'm left with two boys (she doesn't want to see them much) and am desperately trying to avoid them getting their heads screwed up in the same way her head got screwed when her father dumped her. It's a tough one dude - but divorce can be even more horrible... A trial separation sounds like a good move - gives you both time to take stock... Stay strong...

[Ulysses]

As an aside, AAS can really mess with your head at a time you really need to be able to trust your though processes... Maybe worth postponing until things are a bit more settled? Just an idea...

[40plusnewbie]

As an aside, AAS can really mess with your head at a time you really need to be able to trust your though processes... Maybe worth postponing until things are a bit more settled? Just an idea...

Thanks, this sounds like a good idea. Now if only my wife could put things like this this way lol

[Igifuno]

Man I'm sypathetic to dynamic personalities and people with troubles that lie deep, but why would she want to call the cops on you and make something up? That would have me a wreck..

[Hazard]

The only advice I can give here is this......

DO NOT call the cops on her until you have removed ALL of your gear and supplies from the house and to a location that she DOES NOT know about.....

~Haz~

[calgarian]

I'm no prince charming, I have my faults, but I own up to them and work towards changing them.

My wife seems to think she is perfect and any time she does anything wrong she blames me. i.e. I say something that 'makes her mad' (can be some stupid mundane thing) and she goes off for 1/2 hour yelling about everything under the sun and then tells me it was my fault because I made her mad. Se doesn't seem to grasp the concept that we are all responsible for our own behavior, and the only time an adult should be screaming is like if they are being chased by a rapist or something.....

Due to the religion I was raised under I put off the notion of getting divorced, we have been together 7 yrs and married 5, my first and only exclusive relationship. Hell, I'll tell you, it sure is a blow back to see how people change after they get married.

Counseling isn't an option b/c, like I said, she see's anything she does 'wrong' as coming from something I did wrong, regardless of how small. Arguments are getting worse, particularly since I basically stopped participating in them, remaining calm and trying to calmly and quietly talk her down.

Since I have become recently reinvigorated with the desire to work out and build my body, now that I am done with PT eating clean, working out regularly, and telling my wife well in advance I am going on a steroid cycle, things she was all initially cool with. Well tonight she tells me she is throwing away all my steroids /gear making supplies, etc "because they mess up my head" (excuse, i have done one anavar cycle more than a yr ago and she didn't even know).

I have had so many crisis and set backs over the past year, did my best to fight through them, endured my marital difficulties and tried to help my wife improve, and I finally get a positive mindset on eating clean, working my body, and doing a cycle to make myself feel good... and she tells me she is going to step on it.

My wife wants a 'trial separation'. I explained this will not work until she gains insight into her own acting out, takes responsibility for her own actions (and without saying it, basically stops acting like the worlds most selfish bitch, at least to me).

I'm now deciding whether or not I am going to stay local in MA, which I likely will at least until 10/1 when I will pick up 3 weeks vacation pay, and then stay on with the co I have been with for 15 yrs, or make a completely impulsive move to either Las Vegas (I used to be a semi-pro poker player online and the biggest and most fish are in Las Vegas) or to Miami Beach, simply because I LOVE it there.

So I went from feeling like a 10 last night to feeling like a zero tonight after the convo with my wife. I know this won't change. I guess I picked the wrong woman, likely because I had no experience in long term relationships.

I'm at a crossroads and not sure what will happen, what I will do. My motivation is shit today. I don't know if I will be able to break free from the psychological prob's until I break free from my wife, unfortunately all my money is tied up so I am stuck living with her for the next cpl of months.

I'm gonna do my brew at a hotel this weekend, hopefully she doesn't destroy all my shit before then....


Sometimes life sucks...and not in a good way........

Give her what she wants but after following Haz advise if she love u she will come back if not.....one less thing to worry about sometimes when u live together u get on each others nerve, separation may help.

[zimmy]

I wish that they made it required to get marriage counseling before a divorce is allowed. It seems to me that there are some women that have no respect for what marriage is because they have their pride standing up a wall that does not allow them to be an equal to their husband, hence they will never be a good spouse.

[ReX357]

Had one without a father too and she ended up destroying my whole life. Please leave right now. Do not counsel. It does not work. She will not change, I can guarantee it. I have been through the same stuff you have been through, the same thoughts and the same situation. It ended up destroying my whole life in the end, bankruptcy included.

Society is teaching the modern man to be caring, understanding, trying to please the woman and fulfill her every need. It is the very reason most marriages are failing nowadays.

Men have to be men.

From now on, please remember this:

There is no such thing as equality between sexes. That's complete bullsh*t. Nature made it so there was a dominant sex that would lead the way for populations to survive. And here's my tips on how to achieve that dominance:

Anytime a woman tells you to do something, refuse to do it. That's gotta be done from the start of the relationship, from the very first time you meet her. Right away, the woman will understand that you're not the kind of chump she can step on. Also, get her to do stuff all the time. That will give her a purpose in your life as well as asserting your dominant role in the relationship. Remember she has to be a part of your life, not the other way around.

One thing about negotiations I learned is this: To win negotiations, you have to be willing to walk away. The willingness to walk away from a deal gives you the upper hand. The woman has to feel that if she doesn't comply, she will lose the greatest man in the world (= YOU).

She doesn't want to put out? No big deal. There's another one waiting one call away. Make sure she knows it too. My way of saying it is: "I don't have to fight for sex. If you don't wanna put out, it's fine I got another one waiting." Say it with a smile on your face like it doesn't bother you.

I could go on about women psychology but I'll stop here...

Yes, be a d*ck. Is this mind control? F*cking right it is! Will you ever have trouble with women again? Not very much probably. Will you get everything you want from a woman (anal sex included)? Pretty good chance!

[AllAlone]

I am at the begining of a divorce myself...after 5 years and 2 kids. If you don't have any kids involved consider yourself lucky!! I love my kids to death but can mom ever use them to her advantage...Jesus tap dancin' Christ!!! Not only do I pay 80%+ in child support but I have to listen to my son tell me stories about other dudes reading him bedtime stories. There are actually dads out there that want to be involved in their kids lives...not just every other weekend bullshit...it's the women who use the legal system to drain you of everything you have making it impossible to afford a home, food, clothing or anything for yourself or your children. Men do not get free legal support either...oh no...and you get what you pay for too...and when you're living off of 20% of your salary and still trying to have a little bit of a life, you don't get much. I would cut my left arm off before ever even thinking about getting married again!! You should have to go through a trail divorce as a requirement for getting married...One signature on one piece of paper WILL **** you for the rest of your life!! End venting.

[ghettoboyd]

sorry to hear of your troubles my friend......i think youve already made up your mind as to what to do....remember you too have the right to be happy....have you ever mentioned divorce to her?....maybee that would make her back down a bit...anyways good luck and i hope you find a resolution soon.....

[DSM4Life]

Sorry to hear.

Best advice I can give, seems to work a lot....... Sleep with a guy. Always makes me feel better.

[garythompson]

sounds like youre blaming her for all the problems. every problem you talked about you basicall said it was her fault. I'm not saying youre not right or are right but maybe you should try to step back and see things from an unbiased p.o.v. You should forget the gear and workout naturally if its that big of a deal to you to get into shape right now. maybe youre starting to worry about your looks because you know you'll need them when you finally get a divorse. stop working on getting ready for things when the marriage is over and start working on repairing the situation now so you don't end up getting a divorse. definitely work on getting her to agree to counceling. if things were good for a number of years then somethingwas going right and things eventually got messed up. marriage isn't supposed to be easy, but you get out what you put in. there is no excuse for divorse in God's eyes except if your spouse cheats on you. just work harder on it man and you two can get through things.

[FranciscoG]

When is the divorce party?

Who is bringing the hocker and strippers?

[AllAlone]

When is the divorce party?

Who is bringing the hocker and strippers?

I like the way you think!!

[FranciscoG]

I am 7 months post divorce and allow me to explain:

Life rules. Whore are great. And constant tropical weather + no one to bitch at me = Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedom (In Bravehart´s voice!)

[MaNiCC]

I hope things work out for the best for you.

keep us updated

[ReX357]

sounds like youre blaming her for all the problems. every problem you talked about you basicall said it was her fault. I'm not saying youre not right or are right but maybe you should try to step back and see things from an unbiased p.o.v. You should forget the gear and workout naturally if its that big of a deal to you to get into shape right now. maybe youre starting to worry about your looks because you know you'll need them when you finally get a divorse. stop working on getting ready for things when the marriage is over and start working on repairing the situation now so you don't end up getting a divorse. definitely work on getting her to agree to counceling. if things were good for a number of years then somethingwas going right and things eventually got messed up. marriage isn't supposed to be easy, but you get out what you put in. there is no excuse for divorse in God's eyes except if your spouse cheats on you. just work harder on it man and you two can get through things.

Please don't listen to this guy. He doesn't understand what kind of woman you are with right now. I know exactly what you're going through. I tried anger management (they were wondering why I was there), counselling, how to save your marriage books. All along I thought I was the problem (and she made me think that too). Looking back now I know she was just completly crazy and manipulative.

All those thoughts you mentionned in your first post I had.

Please run away as far as you can and don't look back.

[40plusnewbie]

Man I'm sypathetic to dynamic personalities and people with troubles that lie deep, but why would she want to call the cops on you and make something up? That would have me a wreck..

Well, when a man is angry at another man he might haul off and punch him in the none. But if one man is 250lbs and the other man is 500 lbs. he better come up with another plan than 'punch the dude in the nose'.

So when women get angry at men (who are usually 2x their size) they do things like get their brother to beat them up, get their ex bofriend to, act all nice and then steal from their bank account until they dump their ass.... something they had been scheming for months.
Or they threaten to call the cops on them. I think by law in my state if a female calls the cops on a male she is living with the man is automatically taken to jail (unless their are obvious massive wounds to the male and none to the female).

Hell, as it was, I called on her and the cop persisted in asking me 2 times to step outside so we could talk about it. I retorted, I called on her, I am the victim here, I think she should be the one who has to go outside. The third time he went from asking to 'telling' (i.e. giving a police command, if I did not obey I would be subject to arrest, he did not tell me that I know this b/c I know something about the law).

He did this so I, the male, would strategically be positioned closer to the police car. I'm willing to bet it is also a law in MA that the male must be the one to go outside while they separate to get the stories. Equal right my ass... I'm lucky she told the truth to the cop who interviewed her or I woulda been fending off bubba that night... (not to mention have a record of arrest for domestic violence, things employers and such just love to see when they run a CORI on a potential applicant....)

(some) Female police officers in Boston actually refer to this as 'wine 'em, dine 'em, and 509 'em) i.e. Have the dude take you out for drinks, dinner, etc and then call and make allegations of abuse 509-A I think it might be called) 'em.

[40plusnewbie]

The only advice I can give here is this......

DO NOT call the cops on her until you have removed ALL of your gear and supplies from the house and to a location that she DOES NOT know about.....

~Haz~

Thank you, I have already thought about this and will be nice enough to her until it is all out so she will not threaten to do this to me. Once it's out, who knows. If she acts up again it's a second police report on her ass for domestic, she wasn't arrested, but they know her as a false reporter of sorts now because she admitted what she did to the cop even though 'i'm a nice guy and didn't do anything wrong'.

[40plusnewbie]

I wish that they made it required to get marriage counseling before a divorce is allowed. It seems to me that there are some women that have no respect for what marriage is because they have their pride standing up a wall that does not allow them to be an equal to their husband, hence they will never be a good spouse.

I told her sister today (who no doubt already told her or will) if she seeks separate counseling for herself and only herself, talking about what her problems are, exploring to figure out what they are if necessary, etc .....
and fronts me 1/2 of next years rent (because she threatened to stop paying rent to ruin my credit) I would sign a lease as it's up in 6 weeks, we renew are or locked in. I'll lock in if she will pay her 12 months to me in advance, then she can leave early if she wants.

If not, separation definite, divorce very likely.

We can always do couples counseling down the road when she first learns - that only babies and people being chased by people with axes are allowed to scream for 45 min. straight.

[dec11]

sounds like youre blaming her for all the problems. every problem you talked about you basicall said it was her fault. I'm not saying youre not right or are right but maybe you should try to step back and see things from an unbiased p.o.v. You should forget the gear and workout naturally if its that big of a deal to you to get into shape right now. maybe youre starting to worry about your looks because you know you'll need them when you finally get a divorse. stop working on getting ready for things when the marriage is over and start working on repairing the situation now so you don't end up getting a divorse. definitely work on getting her to agree to counceling. if things were good for a number of years then somethingwas going right and things eventually got messed up. marriage isn't supposed to be easy, but you get out what you put in. there is no excuse for divorse in God's eyes except if your spouse cheats on you. just work harder on it man and you two can get through things.

you numbnut

[dec11]

break ups never easy no matter what but i think based on your info your best out of that, aint going to get better mate

[40plusnewbie]

Had one without a father too and she ended up destroying my whole life. Please leave right now. Do not counsel. It does not work. She will not change, I can guarantee it. I have been through the same stuff you have been through, the same thoughts and the same situation. It ended up destroying my whole life in the end, bankruptcy included.

Society is teaching the modern man to be caring, understanding, trying to please the woman and fulfill her every need. It is the very reason most marriages are failing nowadays.

Men have to be men.

From now on, please remember this:

There is no such thing as equality between sexes. That's complete bullsh*t. Nature made it so there was a dominant sex that would lead the way for populations to survive. And here's my tips on how to achieve that dominance:

Anytime a woman tells you to do something, refuse to do it. That's gotta be done from the start of the relationship, from the very first time you meet her. Right away, the woman will understand that you're not the kind of chump she can step on. Also, get her to do stuff all the time. That will give her a purpose in your life as well as asserting your dominant role in the relationship. Remember she has to be a part of your life, not the other way around.

One thing about negotiations I learned is this: To win negotiations, you have to be willing to walk away. The willingness to walk away from a deal gives you the upper hand. The woman has to feel that if she doesn't comply, she will lose the greatest man in the world (= YOU).

She doesn't want to put out? No big deal. There's another one waiting one call away. Make sure she knows it too. My way of saying it is: "I don't have to fight for sex. If you don't wanna put out, it's fine I got another one waiting." Say it with a smile on your face like it doesn't bother you.

I could go on about women psychology but I'll stop here...

Yes, be a d*ck. Is this mind control? F*cking right it is! Will you ever have trouble with women again? Not very much probably. Will you get everything you want from a woman (anal sex included)? Pretty good chance!

My big mistake was getting married (going exclusive rather). For the 15 years prior to this I had a rotating string of one night stands, bootie calls, non exclusive (at least for me) sex partners, etc. Women were a dime a dozen.

When I started I used to go out and talk to at least 20 woman a day. Then I started hitting on 20 women a day, and for me 'hitting on' meant sex THAT DAY, none of this phone number bullshit.

I had rules

1. Only date women u are already ****ing.
2. Never pay for (as in a drink, club entrance, dinner, a cup of coffee lol) any woman that you are not already ****ing!

I probably got laid a couple dozen times because a women would come over to me and ask me to buy her a drink and I would look her square in the eye and say.....
"I only buy drinks for women I am already ****ing."

Following those 2 simple rules will solve 99% of all single males problems.

I had mad skills, I have friend who are wealthy today because they travel the world to teach shy guys how to pick up chicks. I have a friend who wrote a book about it. One of the dicks even had 2 reality shows, I never cared for him but we came up at the same time. We all belonged to a small internet discussion group we would compare notes, ideas, strategies, successes, failures, post reports and let others critique. I dropped out when the guys started going public wanting to meet up and teach the shit and have their names and faces known, etc. I value my anonymity.

It will be a little tough to get back into the swing of things after 7 years of exclusive/married life, but I got skills bro, and I am gonna get them up and running after I get divorced u better believe that. I was happier single. I was never miserable single. Sometimes I was in bla mode, but that was as bad as it got... and i had a cure for that every weekend!

[40plusnewbie]

sorry to hear of your troubles my friend......i think youve already made up your mind as to what to do....remember you too have the right to be happy....have you ever mentioned divorce to her?....maybee that would make her back down a bit...anyways good luck and i hope you find a resolution soon.....

Mentioned it? lol i've ****ing yelled it! She wants a 'trial separation'. I posted my criteria for this, as I told to her sister as i'm sure it will get back to her, in a post a few above this. I doubt she will go for it.

[yannick35]

When there is still love there is still hope, not sure if you both still have this tough.

Counseling is worked great for me and my GF, and it changed a lot of things in our couple, wrongs that i did and wrongs that she did.

[Panzerfaust]

Divorce and be happy!

/thread

[Swifto]

Divorce and be happy!

/thread

Dam your cut throat!

[BJJ]

I do not feel to be able to give you a helpful advice.
I wish you good luck.

[stevey_6t9]

My big mistake was getting married (going exclusive rather). For the 15 years prior to this I had a rotating string of one night stands, bootie calls, non exclusive (at least for me) sex partners, etc. Women were a dime a dozen.

When I started I used to go out and talk to at least 20 woman a day. Then I started hitting on 20 women a day, and for me 'hitting on' meant sex THAT DAY, none of this phone number bullshit.

I had rules

1. Only date women u are already ****ing.
2. Never pay for (as in a drink, club entrance, dinner, a cup of coffee lol) any woman that you are not already ****ing!

I probably got laid a couple dozen times because a women would come over to me and ask me to buy her a drink and I would look her square in the eye and say.....
"I only buy drinks for women I am already ****ing."

Following those 2 simple rules will solve 99% of all single males problems.

I had mad skills, I have friend who are wealthy today because they travel the world to teach shy guys how to pick up chicks. I have a friend who wrote a book about it. One of the dicks even had 2 reality shows, I never cared for him but we came up at the same time. We all belonged to a small internet discussion group we would compare notes, ideas, strategies, successes, failures, post reports and let others critique. I dropped out when the guys started going public wanting to meet up and teach the shit and have their names and faces known, etc. I value my anonymity.

It will be a little tough to get back into the swing of things after 7 years of exclusive/married life, but I got skills bro, and I am gonna get them up and running after I get divorced u better believe that. I was happier single. I was never miserable single. Sometimes I was in bla mode, but that was as bad as it got... and i had a cure for that every weekend!

what are you neil strauss?