self image/esteem

**Schmidty** · 03-08-2012, 08:14 AM

Im sure most people on this site are in better shape then the typical or average person. But how many of you actually see it when you look at yourself? Im a little more then a week away from my first bodybuilding show, i know i look good especially next to sumbody else my same height and weight. What i look at myself i cant ever see myself as being a bodybuilder. All i see is flaws and pieces of imperfections. umtimes when i am in the middle or end of a workout i can see sum progress but it quickly goes away. Seems like every time i get to a new goal physically for sum reason it never changes how i really feel about myself. Anybody else relate?

**androbolic_09** · 03-08-2012, 08:23 AM

Well i have little muscle, and more of the skinny fat type right now. I want to gain muscle, but am self conscious of gaining fat. So thats what has driven me to do a super slow clean bulk. I was gaining good a few years back, then went through a tough time, and lost it all. I constantly look at myself in disgust, but it has become my ultimate drive to change my image. but i will prolly be the same way, seeing imperfections from here on out.

**gearbox** · 03-08-2012, 08:26 AM

I think eventually you may reach a point to where you are content. It sounds like you are a perfectionsit and know how you want to look. I agree with looking in the mirror and seeing all the things that you wish to change, or would change. But I can not complain unless I am doing everything in my power to change this.

**alexISthrowed** · 03-08-2012, 08:27 AM

I look amazing. I will stop next to anything reflective and hit a few poses. I love looking at myself.

**JD250** · 03-08-2012, 08:28 AM

I've been that way my whole life, with everything I do, business, relationships, appearances etc.... being driven and a perfectionist will drive you mad (and everyone around you) if you are relentless with it. I've learned to take some time every once in a while and look back (reflect) on the past, I mean really pay attention to details and then compare it to where you are now, you'll see that you ARE getting better, stronger, bigger, wiser, more mature, etc..... not many people will take the time to pat someone else on the back and we aren't comfortable doing it ourselves, nobody wants to appear arrogant but it's healthy to stop and take serious notice of the progress we are making in whatever we do.

BTW, if that's you in your avy....you're looking good (no homo)

**alexISthrowed** · 03-08-2012, 08:29 AM

Originally Posted by gearbox

I think eventually you may reach a point to where you are content. It sounds like you are a perfectionsit and know how you want to look. I agree with looking in the mirror and seeing all the things that you wish to change, or would change. But I can not complain unless I am doing everything in my power to change this.

Most people in this sport/hobby will never be satisfied. Where do you get your motivation from when you just want to stay the same?

**gearbox** · 03-08-2012, 08:38 AM

I was referring to someone outside the bb comp world. But even then maintaining is hard enough when u look like many of the pros do. Such dedication!

**supersize me** · 03-08-2012, 08:40 AM

Originally Posted by alexISthrowed

I look amazing. I will stop next to anything reflective and hit a few poses. I love looking at myself.

Hahaha. I've done this my entire life. When I was little my parents made me sit with my back to the windows at dinner so i wouldn't look at myself the whole time.

**Hazard** · 03-08-2012, 09:15 AM

I'm the same way..... I've had a few moments where I sw myself in the mirror and thought "Dammmm you've come a long way" but most of the time I see what i'm not. I thought I'd be happy at 220, 230, 240, and 250. I hit 255 and wasn't happy..... so I set a new goal of 280. I mean why the fvck not..... heh.

~Haz~

**gixxerboy1** · 03-08-2012, 11:16 AM

Originally Posted by Hazard

I'm the same way..... I've had a few moments where I sw myself in the mirror and thought "Dammmm you've come a long way" but most of the time I see what i'm not. I thought I'd be happy at 220, 230, 240, and 250. I hit 255 and wasn't happy..... so I set a new goal of 280. I mean why the fvck not..... heh.

~Haz~

lol. i agree. I always said ill big at xxxlbs. Then i get there and am like ehh. then 10lbs heavier, eh. It never fvcking ends

**awms** · 03-08-2012, 11:27 AM

I have been considered "good looking" my whole life, I am lucky and it has not gone to my head but I find that when you are a very good looking person people look for your flaws and try to point them out...people expect you to always look good so when you are having a bad day or are tired people will take notice and point it out! If someone looses weight and look normal people will say "OMG! you look amazing! you are in such good shape now!" but if I get above 11% bf people will point that out too lol It weird how the world works!

Am I happy with the way I look now? Not 100% but im getting there...Im hoping this summer to have my "ideal body".

**JAB1** · 03-08-2012, 11:28 AM

I am the same way man. My wife thinks I have a body image issue. I dont obsess over it or anything, Im not depressed or insecure. I just only see flaws when I look at myself. I dont like not wearing a shirt at beach or whatever, Im just not comfortable, even tho I know I have a nicer body than most everyone there. Its weird, I cant explain it. Just like you stated sometimes during workout I will catch a glimpse of myself and think wow Im making progress, etc. But by the time I get home I dont see it. If im bulking I look fat, if im cutting I look skinny, lol. I honestly feel as though I dont even look like I work out if im not pumped at gym. But yeah, everyone else that knows me thinks im some super healthy gym nut nutrition freak, perfectionist, etc. I have come to accept that Ill never see myself the way I see others, I guess thats what drives me to progress. It would be nice to sit back and admire myself american psycho style but not gonna happen, lol

**awms** · 03-08-2012, 11:29 AM

It odd I feel like my self esteem suffers from my look in an off way haha its should vein I now but that how I feel.

**awms** · 03-08-2012, 11:34 AM

I find it funny when I see guys who think they have amazing model like bodies and take their shirt off every chance they get! lol they workout and take cell tech which they feel automatically makes them jacked haha I have a couple budies who are like this....the one guy is like 16% bf and takes his shirt off every chance he can get! every pic on facebook is him flexing lol then Im sitting here at about 8% bf scared to take my shirt off lol

**SexySweetheart** · 03-08-2012, 11:46 AM

I’m the exact opposite lmao!

I was always lean with buxom curves in the best places ...than gained weight, my head still thinks I’m sizzling sexy Lol, except for when I notice myself in a mirror unexpectedly ~ than I go into shock! . . . . and get down on myself
Its almost like I know what I look like and don’t care for it, but my head is in denial repeating over and over "you still work out you still eat real healthy food you still get hit on you still do the same fun stuff you still take your vites and supplements you still think and read on fitness, nothing’s changed you haven’t changed nothing’s changed"

~I had a dream once * I looked in the mirror, was surprised by the person looking back at me, and then told the person in the reflection that she was confused, in the wrong mirror, now go get Kris and tell her she better not be late the next time I look in the mirror again*

Lol weird

**cherrydrpepper** · 03-08-2012, 11:53 AM

Oh Haz hahah. I file away in the mental cabinet almost every compliment I get whether from a girl or a guy. The other day I got asked what I bench, a few days ago I walked outside my apt with my shirt off and some college girls whistled at me, and a couple weeks ago my brother saw me with my shirt off and said "dude i'll deny this if you ever bring it up again, but you look like a model with your shirt off".

I have very bad body ..whats the word, dysmorphia? I don't see myself as I am. I look at it as a plus to drive me to do well in the gym. I still see myself as the 125 lb eighteen year old from 12 years ago. Who wants to be content anyway thats the sure route to looking like a bag of shit.

**Mark5** · 03-08-2012, 11:56 AM

Originally Posted by Schmidty

Im sure most people on this site are in better shape then the typical or average person. But how many of you actually see it when you look at yourself? Im a little more then a week away from my first bodybuilding show, i know i look good especially next to sumbody else my same height and weight. What i look at myself i cant ever see myself as being a bodybuilder. All i see is flaws and pieces of imperfections. umtimes when i am in the middle or end of a workout i can see sum progress but it quickly goes away. Seems like every time i get to a new goal physically for sum reason it never changes how i really feel about myself. Anybody else relate?

I'm kind of the opposite...when I'm at home looking in the mirror, I'm "The Man." Yet once I step into the gym and see other people who have a better "this" or a better "that," my self confidence in my own body image kind of deflates until I get back home again.

**evander87** · 03-08-2012, 01:07 PM

Humm I love the way I look. I know I was a fatty and I wanted abs. I set a goal. I busted my ass and reached my goal. Well instead of just sitting there I set new goals. But not because I'm unhappy with how I look, but because there is always room for improvement and I feel great when I set out to do something and I actually do it.

**alexISthrowed** · 03-08-2012, 01:19 PM

I think you would find a lot of people on this and other bodybuilding forums with body image issues. I used to hate the way I looked when I was young and I had all the tools to change it but I was too lazy. Now I'm a sexy man beast. I have a good looking face with a perfect jaw line though, if your an ugly mofo you can't change that. And schmidty your ripped up go be cocky and pose in all the mirrors and windows you walk by.

**Shol'va** · 03-08-2012, 03:29 PM

Originally Posted by Hazard

I'm the same way..... I've had a few moments where I sw myself in the mirror and thought "Dammmm you've come a long way" but most of the time I see what i'm not. I thought I'd be happy at 220, 230, 240, and 250. I hit 255 and wasn't happy..... so I set a new goal of 280. I mean why the fvck not..... heh.

~Haz~

Yeah Haz life is crazy. There are some on here who would kill to look as good as you. 2 on here would kill to hook up with you.

It's weird how it is. It's like we are never satisfied with how we look always seeing the imperfections in our own bodies while everyone else sees the perfections and thinks we are crazy when we aren't happy with how we look.

**Shol'va** · 03-08-2012, 03:32 PM

Originally Posted by Schmidty

Im sure most people on this site are in better shape then the typical or average person. But how many of you actually see it when you look at yourself? Im a little more then a week away from my first bodybuilding show, i know i look good especially next to sumbody else my same height and weight. What i look at myself i cant ever see myself as being a bodybuilder. All i see is flaws and pieces of imperfections. umtimes when i am in the middle or end of a workout i can see sum progress but it quickly goes away. Seems like every time i get to a new goal physically for sum reason it never changes how i really feel about myself. Anybody else relate?

In the words of Bill Crystal...lol

**Gaspari1255** · 03-08-2012, 04:07 PM

Until you can wear a shirt publicly that says: "I'm on steroids - SAY SOMETHIN" and nobody looks at you the wrong way- is when you should be content

**DCI** · 03-08-2012, 04:19 PM

Originally Posted by Hazard

I'm the same way..... I've had a few moments where I sw myself in the mirror and thought "Dammmm you've come a long way" but most of the time I see what i'm not. I thought I'd be happy at 220, 230, 240, and 250. I hit 255 and wasn't happy..... so I set a new goal of 280. I mean why the fvck not..... heh.

~Haz~

Same here too but I'm no where the level of ye guys to be honest. But I'm going to get into it properly now and try and be in the same shape as ye lads.

**JohnnyVegas** · 03-08-2012, 06:19 PM

I think I look awful and I think I have a long way to go. Funny thing is, I can go to the mall and see what "normal" guys look like and realize that I am bigger but it still doesn't matter when I look in the mirror.

I did have a reality check the other day when I looked in the mirror and said, "man, I look like a fat twig" and my wife said, "you've GOT to be kidding." It made me step a back and realize I have come a long way during the past year back in the gym...but I still have to lose some fat. And put on some muscle. Ugh, I am like a fat twig.

**DCI** · 03-08-2012, 06:49 PM

Originally Posted by JohnnyVegas

I think I look awful and I think I have a long way to go. Funny thing is, I can go to the mall and see what "normal" guys look like and realize that I am bigger but it still doesn't matter when I look in the mirror.

I did have a reality check the other day when I looked in the mirror and said, "man, I look like a fat twig" and my wife said, "you've GOT to be kidding." It made me step a back and realize I have come a long way during the past year back in the gym...but I still have to lose some fat. And put on some muscle. Ugh, I am like a fat twig.

Weird how you percieve yourself aint it. My GF said the same thing to me only recently I was like nah I'm not, you kinda do just spot the bad in you always dor some strange reason don't you.

**Jessgirl** · 03-08-2012, 08:43 PM

Wow, give you credit for admitting.... Yes we are all hard on ourselves, too hard. IM sure you look a lot better then giving yourself credit for, but better to be confident then cocky ! What's more sad is the people that try to stay in shape and look good don't give themselves enough credit.... Vanity is not always a good thing !

**Hazard** · 03-08-2012, 10:38 PM

Originally Posted by awms

I have been considered "good looking" my whole life, I am lucky and it has not gone to my head but I find that when you are a very good looking person people look for your flaws and try to point them out...people expect you to always look good so when you are having a bad day or are tired people will take notice and point it out! If someone looses weight and look normal people will say "OMG! you look amazing! you are in such good shape now!" but if I get above 11% bf people will point that out too lol It weird how the world works!

Am I happy with the way I look now? Not 100% but im getting there...Im hoping this summer to have my "ideal body".

Oh I'm one sexy mfkr

- I'm actually not "conceited" I get a little uncomfortable when people give me compliments but I'm pretty confident. I know I'm not an ugly guy..... I'm built better than the average guy..... and when you KNOW that you have an err of confidence.

Trollin women since 97..... but when I put size on..... My game elevated to a WHOLE NEW level.

~Haz~

**Sgt. Hartman** · 03-08-2012, 10:41 PM

Originally Posted by Hazard

Oh I'm one sexy mfkr

- I'm actually not "conceited" I get a little uncomfortable when people give me compliments but I'm pretty confident. I know I'm not an ugly guy..... I'm built better than the average guy..... and when you KNOW that you have an err of confidence.

Trollin women since 97..... but when I put size on..... My game elevated to a WHOLE NEW level.

~Haz~

Just cause DSM says it doesn't make it so lol.

**Hazard** · 03-08-2012, 10:51 PM

Originally Posted by Sgt. Hartman

Just cause DSM says it doesn't make it so lol.

His assessment is a fair one

~Haz~

**Schmidty** · 03-09-2012, 07:04 PM

glad im not the only one! I cant stand the 160-170lb guys on fb talking about getting jacked and pumped. I want that ego! I need that ego. I Dont want to walk up on stage and judges see it in my face that i feel like a little guy or sumthing.

**Hazard** · 03-10-2012, 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by Schmidty

glad im not the only one! I cant stand the 160-170lb guys on fb talking about getting jacked and pumped. I want that ego! I need that ego. I Dont want to walk up on stage and judges see it in my face that i feel like a little guy or sumthing.

At your height and weight..... you're no little guy lol - shit..... I have self image issues but I know i'm not a small guy lol. You'll do fine..... it's natural to be nervous. If you've done everything you could to prepare..... then you'll be fine.

~Haz~

**Randy** · 03-13-2012, 11:56 PM

Originally Posted by Mark5

I'm kind of the opposite...when I'm at home looking in the mirror, I'm "The Man." Yet once I step into the gym and see other people who have a better "this" or a better "that," my self confidence in my own body image kind of deflates until I get back home again.

Im definetely the same way,i've come a long way from where i use to be,physichally,mentally and spiritually...But bigger is ALWAYS better

**Bryan2** · 03-14-2012, 01:47 AM

Everyone tends to get to a point in life where something major happens that has absolutely nothing to do with your self image that is powerful enough for you to see what really matters in life.

The down side is no one is able to hold into that lesson. It takes continual discovering....

You'll get to a point where you realize its not too important and that you can see past only the negative. Try to hold onto it for as long as you can next time.