I'm ready.

**Hunter** · 12-07-2012, 01:25 PM

Having kids is amazing. I am sure you will be an amazing father best of luck. A lil storyt prepare you for fatherhood. My son walked in on his mom naked and cried for 20 minutes about what happened to her weiner. He then went around the table going you have weiner, you dont etc aroun the entire dinner table.

**Times Roman** · 12-07-2012, 01:28 PM

I think the MOST important thing a couple can provide a baby is a safe loving environment. I also know you have the full support of your family, which is also very important. You two have had a lot of time to think about this, so i'm sure you've worked out all the kinks.

And I'm sure someone is going to flame me for saying this, but I really believe a two parent household is better for the kids than a one parent household.

Good luck DSM!

---Roman

**Capebuffalo** · 12-07-2012, 01:44 PM

Originally Posted by Times Roman

I think the MOST important thing a couple can provide a baby is a safe loving environment. I also know you have the full support of your family, which is also very important. You two have had a lot of time to think about this, so i'm sure you've worked out all the kinks.

And I'm sure someone is going to flame me for saying this, but I really believe a two parent household is better for the kids than a one parent household.

Good luck DSM!

---Roman

Why would anyone flame you for that.Its true

AD · 12-07-2012, 02:13 PM

Originally Posted by Capebuffalo

Sometimes I wish they would put me out in the yard.

Have you been misbehaving again?

**Far from massive** · 12-07-2012, 02:14 PM

I have never had a kid of my own, but I have a God-daughter that has lived with me on and off since she was 11 (now 24) and I can tell you its been the most rewarding thing in my life.

Good luck on the adoption, from what I know of you from this board I am sure that you all will make great parents.

**Capebuffalo** · 12-07-2012, 02:17 PM

Originally Posted by AD

Have you been misbehaving again?

I would like the quiet time lol

**Times Roman** · 12-07-2012, 07:40 PM

Originally Posted by Capebuffalo

Why would anyone flame you for that.Its true

I had a (banned) member come at me with claws open one time for suggesting two parents are better than one parent over a year ago. Evidently I struck a nerve, as he came from a one parent family, and thought I was disrespecting his mom or something.

Raising a child is really a difficult thing to do, and one parent just can't be "on" all the time, and sometimes needs the other partner to cover during times of stress, and even illness. AND two parents provides a more "balanced" family environment, with one parent helping to smooth out the peaks and valleys of the family dynamics, and the other way around too.

My mom was too clingy, and really didn't want us playing outside (she was scared something would happen). My dad overrode that (thankfully). My dad was an extremest, and my mom helped smooth out his emotional outbursts (he was always angry, AND a drinker). So the two parents really form a synergistic force, where each parent becomes a better parent with the support of the other.

Anyways, sorry for the hijack DSM.

I'm sure you guys will do well! =)

**Lunk1** · 12-07-2012, 08:01 PM

Originally Posted by Times Roman

I had a (banned) member come at me with claws open one time for suggesting two parents are better than one parent over a year ago. Evidently I struck a nerve, as he came from a one parent family, and thought I was disrespecting his mom or something.

Raising a child is really a difficult thing to do, and one parent just can't be "on" all the time, and sometimes needs the other partner to cover during times of stress, and even illness. AND two parents provides a more "balanced" family environment, with one parent helping to smooth out the peaks and valleys of the family dynamics, and the other way around too.

My mom was too clingy, and really didn't want us playing outside (she was scared something would happen). My dad overrode that (thankfully). My dad was an extremest, and my mom helped smooth out his emotional outbursts (he was always angry, AND a drinker). So the two parents really form a synergistic force, where each parent becomes a better parent with the support of the other.

Anyways, sorry for the hijack DSM.

I'm sure you guys will do well! =)

Make for an interesting thread question...hmmmmm????

**canesfan804** · 12-07-2012, 08:18 PM

Exactly!! I would lose my mind if I had to raise my 3(all girls) on my own. I have told my wife if something happens to her I will be remarried within the month. LOL

Originally Posted by Times Roman

So the two parents really form a synergistic force, where each parent becomes a better parent with the support of the other.
)

**canesfan804** · 12-07-2012, 08:25 PM

Congrats DSM my hats off to anyone who wants to adopt. Kids are wonderful but EVERYTHING changes. I really wouldnt change it for anything tho, they are so awesome. I was sick over Thanksgiving and stayed in the bed all day. My oldest (6yrs old) came into the bed room and said a prayer " God please dont let my daddy die, I know old men have to die sometimes but my daddy is not old. Help him get better so he can be loving and take care of me" had me crying it was so sweet. I was glad the lights were off so she didnt notice. Things like that make all the sacrifice worth it.

**Times Roman** · 12-07-2012, 09:56 PM

Originally Posted by canesfan804

Congrats DSM my hats off to anyone who wants to adopt. Kids are wonderful but EVERYTHING changes. I really wouldnt change it for anything tho, they are so awesome. I was sick over Thanksgiving and stayed in the bed all day. My oldest (6yrs old) came into the bed room and said a prayer " God please dont let my daddy die, I know old men have to die sometimes but my daddy is not old. Help him get better so he can be loving and take care of me" had me crying it was so sweet. I was glad the lights were off so she didnt notice. Things like that make all the sacrifice worth it.

that is so f'ing adorable! only a child can call someone old like that, keep a straight face, and it's all good to go.

I remember my daughter was really nurturing like that. I'd be laying on the sofa, watching the game or something. She'd be there, cuddling or whatever, and then notice a tiny scrape or something on my arm. "Don't worry daddy, I'll fix it!" and off she'd run into the kitchen and come back with this little moist piece of paper towell. Delicately, she'd dab at my "wound". Then off she'd run again into the kitchen to put a drop or two more water on her little towel, then she'd come running back and start dabbing at my "wound' again. After five or ten minutes of this, she'd beam at me and ask me if I felt better.

No matter how old i get, this is the good stuff i will never forget! =)

**alexISthrowed** · 12-08-2012, 12:18 AM

Congrats dsm! You have always been a solid guy, some kids going to a good home. If your having trouble with the adoption uncle Alex can pop one out for you. I got a fresh bottle of hcg !

**wmaousley** · 12-08-2012, 12:38 AM

Congratulations Buddy!!! My parents adopted a 11 year old girl 3 years ago, It was a long process for them.

**DSM4Life** · 12-08-2012, 06:15 AM

Thank you all for the kind words. We have talked it over throughout the years and are as ready as we are going to be. It wasn't until after my niece was born that I truly knew I was ready. I know it its going to be a long road but personally it bothers how much this trip is going to cost. I know you can't put a price tag on a human but the costs (i have a detailed list) are pretty outrageous.

**Capebuffalo** · 12-08-2012, 06:28 AM

One word when you have you baby.

Patients

**Lunk1** · 12-08-2012, 07:18 AM

Originally Posted by DSM4Life;62***28

Thank you all for the kind words. We have talked it over throughout the years and are as ready as we are going to be. It wasn't until after my niece was born that I truly knew I was ready. I know it its going to be a long road but personally it bothers how much this trip is going to cost. I know you can't put a price tag on a human but the costs (i have a detailed list) are pretty outrageous.

Just curious...and since I asked earlier with no reply perhaps you don't care to say, but is this an overseas or domestic adoption?

**DSM4Life** · 12-08-2012, 08:00 AM

Originally Posted by Lunk1;62***62

Just curious...and since I asked earlier with no reply perhaps you don't care to say, but is this an overseas or domestic adoption?

The agency we are currently looking at does only domestic adoption. The plus side to that is we would know the childs entire family medical history.

**Lunk1** · 12-08-2012, 08:14 AM

Originally Posted by DSM4Life;62***95

The agency we are currently looking at does only domestic adoption. The plus side to that is we would know the childs entire family medical history.

This is true...overseas is much cheaper and quicker but I have known families who have adopted infants from foreign countries that on more than one occasion ended up with developmental issues.

Besides...there are so many children in need of a loving home right here that I'm glad to hear you are not concearning yourself $ or time and staying domestic.

Another question...are you concidering an open or closed adoption??

**DSM4Life** · 12-08-2012, 08:21 AM

Originally Posted by Lunk1;62***98

This is true...overseas is much cheaper and quicker but I have known families who have adopted infants from foreign countries that on more than one occasion ended up with developmental issues.

Besides...there are so many children in need of a loving home right here that I'm glad to hear you are not concearning yourself $ or time and staying domestic.

Another question...are you concidering an open or closed adoption??

Well the money is a concern since its so expensive but I'd rather pay more in order to have everything run legal/smoothly. Not sure about the open or close adoption. We are going to make a list of question today to ask our agent. I think as a young child it would be confusing with all these people saying we are your parents.

**Lunk1** · 12-08-2012, 10:13 AM

Originally Posted by DSM4Life;62***99

Well the money is a concern since its so expensive but I'd rather pay more in order to have everything run legal/smoothly. Not sure about the open or close adoption. We are going to make a list of question today to ask our agent. I think as a young child it would be confusing with all these people saying we are your parents.

I apologize..I didn't mean to imply Z$ was or wasn't a concern, just that overseas adoption is drasticly cheaper!

My .02 here on closed vs open in your particular case...obviously since you will be raising a child in a 2 father houshold perhaps an open adoption may actually make explaining things easier vs more difficult. If nothing else, being open to either method may give you more options. The ones I have seen seem to work out pretty well and doesn't result in the whole should I or shouldn't I find my parents issue later on. Just a thought....