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  1. #1
    tolinka's Avatar
    tolinka is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2002

    Joke: The letter from the Penis

    Dear Management,

    I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

    1. I do physical labor;
    2. I work at great depths;
    3. I plunge head first into everything I do;
    4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off;
    5. I work in a damp environment;
    6. I don't get paid overtime;
    7. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation;
    8. I work in high temperatures, and;
    9. My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

    Dear Penis,

    After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

    1. You cannot work eight hours straight;
    2. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods;
    3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team;
    4. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations;
    5. You do not take initiative -- you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working;
    6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift;
    7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing;
    8. You will retire well before you are 65;
    9. You are unable to work double shifts;
    10. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed the assigned task;
    11. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.

    The Management

  2. #2
    Valmont is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    lmao.. Are you sure that wasn't addressed to Ronald Reagan.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    I can only answer that with Rodney Carringtons "Dear Penis"

    Rodney Carrington - Dear Penis

    Dear Penis - I don't think I like you anymore
    You used to watch me shave
    Now all you do is stare at the floor
    Oh dear Penis, I don't like you anymore

    It used to be you and me, a paper towel and a dirty magazine
    That's all we needed to get by
    Now it seems thing have changed and I think that you're the one to blame
    Dear Peanis, I don't like you anymore

    (He sings)

    Dear Rodney, I don't think I like you anymore
    Cause when you get to drinkin'
    You put me places I've never been before
    Dear Rodney, I don't like you anymore

    Why can't we just get a grip
    On our man-to-hand relationship
    And come to terms with truly how we feel

    If we put our heads together
    We'd just stay home forever
    Dear Penis, I think I like you afterall
    Oh and Rodney, while you're shaving, shave my balls


  4. #4
    Terinox's Avatar
    Terinox is offline The One & Only
    Join Date
    Nov 2001

  5. #5
    JUICING's Avatar
    JUICING is offline Associate Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    That's some funny shit!

  6. #6
    palme's Avatar
    palme is offline Rosie Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Haha you guys are crazy

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