Subject: Canadian Temperature Chart



1. 50 degrees Fahrenheit (10 degrees C)

Californians shiver uncontrollably,

Canadians plant gardens.



2. 35 degrees Fahrenheit (1.6 degrees C)

Italian cars won't start,

Canadians drive with the windows down.



3. 32 degrees Fahrenheit (0 degrees C)

American water freezes,

Canadian water gets thicker.



4. 0 degrees Fahrenheit (-17.9 degrees C)

New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.

Canadians have the last barbecue of the season.



5. -60 degrees Fahrenheit (-51 degrees C)

Mt. St. Helens freezes,

Canadians Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.



6. -100 degrees Fahrenheit (-73 degrees C)

Santa Claus abandons the North Pole,

Ottawa canal opens for skating.



7. -173 degrees Fahrenheit (-114 degrees C)

Ethyl alcohol freezes,

Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.



8. -460 degrees Fahrenheit (-273 degrees C)

Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops,

Canadians start saying "cold eh?"



9. -500 degrees Fahrenheit (-295 degrees C)

Hell freezes over.

Leafs win Stanley Cup.