Boyfriend has appointment with Endocrinologist next week. Any advice?

[SupportSeeker]

Hiya.

Im just looking for abit of advice. Bit of back story -

My boyfriend is 26 (Im 25). He was born with undescended testicals and had corrective surgery as a child, twice as the first one was botched. He's always had problems with anxiety, depression and incredibly low self esteem since his teens. He went through a rough patch and became addicted to alcohol (which he is now recovering) and illegal substances, including a year long addiction to heroin. He's been medicated with Valium, Seroquel and Fluoxetine for the past 5 years (which he has dropped about a year ago)
He's never had a massive interest in intimacy in his adulthood. He claims he experienced little to no sensation in his junk; to the point, he said, that it just doesn't feel right. (Does this sound right?)
I know there is some desire in his head as he often ruts against me when were in bed, haha. But there is no spark or physical drive to make it happen. But, he does get frequent and strong erections.

Anyway, I kept on at him for awhile and he just insisted that it was just how he was, until I gave him evidence and started to reconsider. It took 6 trips to the doctor over 3 months to even get taken seriously. First they pawned him off with form of boner pills, then did a blood test which came back as 'Normal/No Action required', then further pressing the GP which he said he doesn't think it has anything to do with hormones as 'he can grow a beard' but finally he was given another blood test which came back as the same. He couldn't take the sheet home but he remembers the measurement of 1.8. 1.8 on any scale of any measurement (as he didn't remember. We are in the UK) is lowest of the low! He finally got a referral for the Endocrinologist which is next Thursday.

So Im wondering if anyone can lend any advice.
Has anyone had similar troubles as us? The system seems nonexistent when it comes to male hormone health.
Can anyone relate to his symptoms?
Are we seeing the right people?
Is there anything we should expect or anything I should ask or double check any details while we're there.

I want to be prepared to make sure we aren't messed around and just get this issue on its way of getting sorted out so he can have a better quality of life.

Any advice is much appreciated!

[Simon1972]

Looks like he is at the early stages of seeking help. First thing I would do is go back to the Dr's and get his blood test results. You have a legal right to these tests. Make out you need them for your files as you would like to pass them onto your endo or urologist a complete rundown of past results. Be prepared to be refused. But stand your ground. Once you get them post up the last results on this forum. We can only guess without seeing this info.

Be patient, and good luck. I hope you persist and come back here.

[SupportSeeker]

It takes a month to get an appointment with the doctor. So we can't get it before the appointment unfortunately. We have no idea what to expect when we arrive at 8am Thursday morning

[kelkel]

Good advice from Simon. Stop in the office and get a copy of the BW. It's his, he paid for it. I would not leave the office without it.

[SupportSeeker]

We are in the UK. Its all free...but again, we can't. Only the doctor can issue it and we cannot get one in time for the appointment.

[APIs]

UK laws may be different, but do ask for any test results. It's hard to diagnose him on symptoms alone. During your visit, be assertive in explaining his symptoms and the severity of your concerns. Tell the Doc how this is affecting your life. Dont be afraid of speaking openly with him either. It's obvious the first Doc didnt know much, which is not uncommon. Regardless, the doc will need to do his own blood work. If you explain yourselves adequately then the blood work should back-up his symptoms as well as your overall concerns. Please review the stickies on the first page of this forum as for what you should ask for regarding adequate blood work and how to prepare for your office visit. Dont become disgusted, it can be a long process to find the right Doc. Hormone replacement is still a developing field. But if Low-T is the culprit, then he can be treated with excellent results. Everyone here can attest to this...

[Simon1972]

We are in the UK. Its all free...but again, we can't. Only the doctor can issue it and we cannot get one in time for the appointment.

trust me, its all free in australia as well. BUT- your taxes pay for it and its results from his blood, so it belongs to him. ..and yes the dr will need to be contacted to get the results- make the phone call.

you shouldnt need an appointment to get results- just tell them another dr needs the tests to review.

[SupportSeeker]

Thank you API. This is very helpful. We knew we had to be assertive, thanks for the advice.
My boyfriends anxiety is quite high and doesn't like repeat appointments as he feels he is being a nuisance and loses his confidence. I've spoken to a retired doctor and he said that the alcohol abuse alone would have lowered it to the point of needing therapy.

I've shown him this and I think it's made him feel better and not as much of a nuisance as he thinks he is. He had to push to have the break in his shoulder taken seriously. Finally he saw someone who put him in for surgery as he had torn all his tendons. Many doctors said he was fine.

[thisAngelBites]

We are in the UK. Its all free...but again, we can't. Only the doctor can issue it and we cannot get one in time for the appointment.

You are entitled to see your record in the UK unless they think you accessing it will cause some serious problem or would be dangerous (and it sounds like your doctor is agreeable, just taking his time).

You (your partner) could ring up the receptionist and see if it is okay for him to come by and have a look at his medical records and then make a note of the results - but if copies need to be made that (sadly) turns it into a bigger deal and you will have to wait.

The GP will have written to the consultant, and if you ask him/her for a copy they may well make one for you. Maybe the receptionist at the GP would even give you that (I usually go private, but my GP has a note in my file to copy me on anything they send out for me, and maybe you could get something like done to make these things easier in future.

[SupportSeeker]

Im aware. But going through all that when we go to the appointment, his bloods would be done again anyway....there doesn't seem any point.

I just wanted advice on what to do at this appointment, if there was anything we should ask or anything we should check ect. We have no idea what to expect or what will happen at this appointment. We want to be armed to teeth with information to avoid walking away too disapointed

[APIs]

Im aware. But going through all that when we go to the appointment, his bloods would be done again anyway....there doesn't seem any point.

I just wanted advice on what to do at this appointment, if there was anything we should ask or anything we should check ect. We have no idea what to expect or what will happen at this appointment. We want to be armed to teeth with information to avoid walking away too disapointed

You have to read the stickies on the first page of this forum. The Threads have IMPORTANT (IN RED) in front of them on the top of the page. They include searching for a TRT Doc. You need to read-up before your visit!

[thisAngelBites]

It's easier for us to give advice if we see the blood work, otherwise we are just guessing about eventualities in every direction.

Presumably the endo will check testosterone (free and bound) and also SHBG which can bind T in the body and make it unavailable to tissues. Sometimes the NHS will skimp on the other tests, or only do them if the first batch shows a problem. There has to be some justification for the GP to refer him on, so there must at least some concern. With any luck, the endo will order a full hormone profile, and then once we see that we could be of more help.

[SupportSeeker]

We're not looking for any medical advice. I've got the advice of a retired doctor for that as the GP was so completely useless. I questioned him when he said everything is fine. On my phone, within the appointment, I got up a Testosterone calculator of sorts and put in his 1.8dl measurement and showed him its in the red and he needed treatment. The GP shrugged and said he would refer him but to be prepared to be rejected. He even admitted he had not dealt with this kind of problem so my boyfriend demanded to speak to a professional and got the referral that way.

Just looking for experience of those who have already been through it all and what happened at their appointment if they wish to share.

[ks1234]

We're not looking for any medical advice. I've got the advice of a retired doctor for that as the GP was so completely useless. I questioned him when he said everything is fine. On my phone, within the appointment, I got up a Testosterone calculator of sorts and put in his 1.8dl measurement and showed him its in the red and he needed treatment. The GP shrugged and said he would refer him but to be prepared to be rejected. He even admitted he had not dealt with this kind of problem so my boyfriend demanded to speak to a professional and got the referral that way.

Just looking for experience of those who have already been through it all and what happened at their appointment if they wish to share.

If you want advice (medical or otherwise) or anything else I would suggest posting up the info people ask for. That way you can get the best advice and people will be more inclined to help you. Help us help you

[SupportSeeker]

I completely understand that. But its not my choice to get those results. He is unable to obtain them without an appointment as its their policy. But again, posting the information up still won't be getting the advice he is asking for - He is just requesting advice from people's experiences as its abit daunting for him. He's going to be poked and prodded by the doctors about this - Its very hard for him to talk anyway.

He would just like some advice on people who have gone through the process, not for someone to analyze his bloods.

[Moonjumper]

I completely understand that. But its not my choice to get those results. He is unable to obtain them without an appointment as its their policy. But again, posting the information up still won't be getting the advice he is asking for - He is just requesting advice from people's experiences as its abit daunting for him. He's going to be poked and prodded by the doctors about this - Its very hard for him to talk anyway.

He would just like some advice on people who have gone through the process, not for someone to analyze his bloods.

Thing is with hrt the process and blood work are often the same thing. Many of the guys here got the run around for years before finally getting a doctor that would actually help them. Many "experts" in this line of work aren't that educated in it.

Your boyfriend is going to be his biggest advocate. Nobody is going to care for his health more than he will care for his own. Reading here and taking the advice of the pros is going to be a huge bonus in his advancement in the process. Even better if he goes into the next appointment with printed copies of the info in the stickies that provide medical cites as to why it is accurate.

Kel is one of the more knowledgeable guys here. He isn't trying to be rude but he is telling the truth. To actually try to help your boyfriend, seeing the lab work is essential. If the proper labs were drawn it can likely be determined exactly why he is low and the best way to fix him. Otherwise all we are doing is speculating on how to help.

Low t can cause depression and anxiety as well as a host of other issues. But your boyfriend is going to have to decide he is tired of it and insist on getting the treatment needed. Seems like an unusual policy requiring an actual appointment and visit to get medical records. I think I would drop in and ask for the reports anyhow.

[Moonjumper]

Ok phone/browser is being ignorant and won't let me fix a typo. KS1234 is right about labs helping a lot. I screwed up as I was browsing down and looked at something Kel said and started typing before going back to confirm the part I wanted to reference was from him. My bad.

[SupportSeeker]

Im not sure why posting his blood work here is essential...because its not. We've had the tests. We've seen them, we just dont have a copy.

We have an appointment to get it sorted - Because he is sick of it. I can't speak for the GPs unusual policies.

Just wanted some advice to soothe his nerves and give him some confidence. He doesn't want his blood work analysed by the forum - Just some advice about the appointment, what to expect and any tips.
I do not doubt that the people here are experienced and knows what they are talking about but all he is looking for is some experience from someone who's been to the appointments...any good or bad experiences.

[kelkel]

The only reason we ask for BW is to give you the most accurate answers we possibly can. Essential, no, us seeing your BW can help guide you but ultimately it's between doctor and patient. Problem is, most (if not all) doctors do not receive training in hormones so it's a weak area of expertise for them. Many simply locate the problem and treat it instead of finding the root cause and correcting it.

The doctor's title really doesn't matter, Endo, Uro, GP, etc., as long as they know hormones and treat you how you feel, not as a number on a chart. Best of luck and please let us know how you make out with your appointment.

[Simon1972]

if he doesnt want advice on what his bloodwork means - than thats fine- we wont insist.

i personanlly cant give advice on how to handle the emotionally side of visiting a dr- i just did it.I didnt give up reserching myself until i found a dr that knew what the members here had been telling me for years.

reading your posts, one thing is clear.

your dr should definitely give him a full male hormonal panel. What he does with it , is between the dr and your partner- hopefully the dr will read the results as accurately as Kel can and not waste your partners time.

if your dr pushes you into a treament that we would expect upon reading your results , then you can be assured of proper care.

sorry we cant be more concise, its hard to considering the constaints of what you are asking, best of luck.

[TaiChiChuan]

I was somewhat in a similar situation as your boyfriend. Completely screwed. Seeing a psychiatrist, endocrinologist, urologist, and primary care doctor. Blood testing was very important for all of them. My testosterone was so low my penis was useless and thinking and having sex was a pipe dream. Doctors had to maintain a constant blood level of the medications and a keep my T hovering around 400-500ng/dl. every month. After 5 years with them, I was on my own with the meds and home test injections.
The military service was a piece of cake compared to what I went through. Request all medical files like I did. Become knowledgeable in reading those blood tests and about any and all medications he's taking. I'm on vitamins, minerals, whey powders, and home injections now and that nightmare is gone forever.

[ks1234]

Im not sure why posting his blood work here is essential...because its not. We've had the tests. We've seen them, we just dont have a copy.

We have an appointment to get it sorted - Because he is sick of it. I can't speak for the GPs unusual policies.

Just wanted some advice to soothe his nerves and give him some confidence. He doesn't want his blood work analysed by the forum - Just some advice about the appointment, what to expect and any tips.
I do not doubt that the people here are experienced and knows what they are talking about but all he is looking for is some experience from someone who's been to the appointments...any good or bad experiences.

As far as advice... I don't think there's really anything most people can say. Just be diligent, get the hard copies of BW for your records, try to find someone that specializes in male hormones.
It can be a looong ardous process for some. It took me several months, several doctors, several blood tests, and a lot of disappointment before I found my urologist (who is awesome btw) and he was the only doctor who was willing to even give me the time of day
So, just stick with it