Thread: What would you do in my shoes?
12-15-2005, 08:05 PM #1
What would you do in my shoes?
Ok well I think the g/f is cheating or about to cheat on me. I use my g/f's cell phone a lot when I am over my minutes and was using it to call my job about some shit. Anyway I know her password for the voiceman and checked it to see if my job had called back, long story short some guy leaves a message at 5am saying things like basically badgering him cuz she says she heard other girls in the backround (she does this to me every so often to see if I'm a cheater which I'm not) and him apologizing for not showing up at 2:30am saying he had to work. She's a stripper but I've known her since way before she ever did that. Now a lot of guy customers call her phone and that's a normal thing but this was different. This was an out of work meeting in my opinion and more of a personal level phone call. He called back at almost 6am and left another message saying "baby dont call the house at that time cuz I hear it from my father about who is calling at that time" For her to know this guys house number is another red flag because that means its more personal and not stripping/money related. Dont let the baby thing throw you off cuz she gets it all the time also so it doesnt raise an eye brow with me. SOOOO the question is.....if she is gonna do something it will most likely be tonight due to a hunch, do I go to her job when she gets off work and see what happens and take action (i know that seems stalker like but I'm not gonna get played) OR just sit home do nothing and confront her about the message the next say. I swore to myself I aint gonna lose or made out to be a douchebag. I'd rather get my licks in before the fact .What do you all think I should do? I wanna hear some opinions.
Last edited by USfighterFC; 12-15-2005 at 08:09 PM.
12-15-2005, 08:12 PM #2
Go bust her in the act and do what you have to do.
12-15-2005, 08:14 PM #3
damn bro i could never date a stripper for one, and for two if you can spy on her without her seeing you then do it she may see your car ??? right ?? i would do it and why the hell is she giveing out her phone # ut to customers that kinda thing needs to stay in the workplace tell them to call the club if they wanna talk to her,
12-15-2005, 08:14 PM #4
Even though youve known her since she started stripping doesnt mean a whole lot. that job will change any girl's attitude and personality i know cuz ive been through it. shes a stripper and will always be chaotic with relationships. honestly if it were me i would go park at the club and just watch. then youll KNOW FOR SURE whats going on.
12-15-2005, 08:18 PM #5Originally Posted by steve0
It's actually understandable that she calls customers to try to get them to go to the club so she can make money off them. Most strippers actually do it and kloter is right, the job can change people but she's a stubborn asshole who doesnt change. But with the phone calls it never bothered me but this time there is something very different and very uncomforting. If i sit and watch and I see what I suspect is true then what would you do in my situation? Try to be objective and honest as you can.
12-15-2005, 08:23 PM #6
always go with your " gut feeling " bruh it never lies
12-15-2005, 08:26 PM #7
Ok so if you go and stakeout the place and see her come out and meet some guy what would you do? i have no idea what i would do...i think i'd just sit there and let it happen. unless your a protective type then you could break it up and whip some azz.
12-15-2005, 08:27 PM #8
I dont know what I would do to be honest I dont wanna jump the gun and say I would do this or that. I have a gut feeling I know what I would do but I will wait to see what happens.
12-15-2005, 08:28 PM #9
well keep us posted on what happens. is this going down tonight?
12-15-2005, 08:29 PM #10Originally Posted by kloter1
it def is
12-15-2005, 08:36 PM #11
if you have a hunch somethings gonna go down tonite between them go to her work and check it out. I would suggest going with a freind so it doesnt look so stalkerish. Just dont catch a case over this if you find out shes fvcking around. And it definitely sounds like shes cheating on you BTW. good luck.
12-15-2005, 08:38 PM #12Originally Posted by USfighterFC
O damn it on now, bro one time i caught my x wih another man, i was drunk when i found them bad idea, so dont start drinking, i stood there a whatched for a bit just to make sure you know because you dont want to beleive it but after about 30 sec i burst out swearing and the whole 9 yards, then walked back to my buddys truck and hauled ass outta there.
12-15-2005, 08:38 PM #13
Get out, get out now. Take it from me, I've dated a dozen dancers, they all turn tricks for $$$.
12-15-2005, 08:40 PM #14
O shit i just noticed you live in Brooklyn, thos mofo's dont mess around uo there are you packing ???
12-15-2005, 08:44 PM #15
Hm..I wouldnt date a stripper but thats ur business. It does sound she is cheating. Tell us how it goes..and bring a buddy with you so 1. doesnt look stalkerish like was already said 2. he can keep u from killing the guy WHEN it does happen.
12-15-2005, 08:48 PM #16
unfortunately I dont have the luxury of a friend willing to go along with me so i know for a fact i have to go it alone. I thought about it earlier if any of my friends would go along with me but I know they wouldnt, it's to late in the night for them cuz they have work the next day. We'll see, I'm confident in every single physical ability I have so shit doesnt bother me.
Last edited by USfighterFC; 12-15-2005 at 08:50 PM.
12-15-2005, 08:50 PM #17Originally Posted by USfighterFC
12-15-2005, 08:53 PM #18Originally Posted by USfighterFC
12-16-2005, 08:59 AM #19
bump.....howd it go??
12-16-2005, 09:05 AM #20Retired Vet
- Join Date
- Nov 2001
I'm in NYC in February, I'll sort that bitch out for ya!.
Sorry I can't give you any advice. We can't pick who we fall in love with, if your truely in love with this girl no one here will have the answer. But if your not, its easy, dump her!.
12-16-2005, 09:06 AM #21
yea man IM curious to know!
12-16-2005, 09:19 AM #22
Most men are quite intuitive with feelings as such. I say go with your gut instincts. What are they saying? More so .....it'll be right.
Unfortunately, my species is not inclined to "cheat" well and keep it hidden. Men on the other hand...are better at it. IMO
12-16-2005, 10:11 AM #23
Take a witness, Girlfriend.
Stripping changes most women. They are COMPETING, you see. They also of course want to make money. I have had strippers for GFs. They start out just dancing, getting the tips, pulling the thong aside for a beaver shot, harmless stuff like that. Next they are in the booth, doing lap dances and hand jobs. Okay, part of the job, right? You expect that, when you go into a tittie bar, especially a low class one, and you are dropping good money. Next, she is going upstairs and doing "VIP"s, which of course always include a BJ. That is where I think the line has definitely been crossed. Manual play is not something I can get very jealous over, as long as it is a customer and she is bringing home the bacon. Wet stuff is different. That is where the line between dancer and whore has been crossed.
It is one thing for you to have a relationship with a whore, knowing that is what she does. It is another thing when you begin a relationship and later she BECOMES a whore.
But obviously, this is not even just simple whoring. She is doing funsies. She LIKES this guy. She isn't just sharing her body... she is sharing her heart and emotions. You need to get the goods, and dump her.
Trust me... avoid dancers. Pick up a nice girl at the grocery store or fast food place or church. Even a girl from work is less trouble than a stripper. Half of them do drugs, and they try to sell them to the other half. They learn a lot of bad habits. Their relationship skills suck. Many of them grow to dislike men on principle. (wouldn't you?)
12-16-2005, 10:22 AM #24
Go down and watch her, and see what happens. If shes sees u, just say u felt like coming to see her or some shit.
12-16-2005, 10:35 AM #25
It got nasty like I thought..........I waited for her to come out of work and she did and she hopped on the phone right away and was apparently looking for someone........the car pulls up and it's not a cab the guy gets out kisses her on the cheek and opens the door to let her in and she goes in. That was all I needed. They drove around the block and I followed them and I passed them on a one way road and skidded my car in front of his. I got out immediately, ripped my jacket off and ran to his car and tried to open it but it was locked. I saw him reaching to put the car in reverse and I kicked out the window and I just let my hands go and was hitting him in the car but I felt like i wasnt hitting him hard enough. I opened the door and my g/f was screaming for me to stop that I'm a psycho and all this other shit. I just pulled this guy out and unloaded everything I had......it was bad I mean i really really hurt this guy BAD. He started convulsing on the floor and I actually got kind of nervous at that point but I remember my cousin told me that happened in a lot of his kickboxing matches after knockouts. I went to her side of the car afterwards and screamed in her face that she's a ****in liar and a ****in whore. She has her big stripper bag filled with outfits and shoes and stuff and I tossed it on the roof off a building and i took her purse and threw it somewhere. Then I told her to **** off and I never want to see her again and dont care if she lives or dies at this point. I have done more for this girl than any girl i ever dated......when she didnt have a job i took care of her and her son for 5 months and sent myself into debt doing it, i took her verbal abuse for a long time, if she called me I was always there for her, I was more of a father to her son than his real father was. I really put a lot of things on the line for this girl and a lot of good relationships I had with people became spoiled because of her. I never questioned her or who her friends were when we dated but as the more shady she became the more questions I would ask. the more questions I would ask the more defensive she would become. I aint gonna lie to you guys, I had to use every single inch of restraint to keep myself from laying her out with the hardest punch I would've ever thrown. I have a feeling this isnt over.
12-16-2005, 10:41 AM #26
Really sorry to hear that sweetie!
12-16-2005, 10:47 AM #27
wow dude, you did what just about every guy on here would do you held your ground man, It's for the better! any relationship where you are unhappy isnt a relationship its emotional torture! we're all here for you bro!
PS. YOURE NOT REAL MAN TIL YOU GET DRUNK AND Beat em!
hahah one of the last things my g-pa told me before he died!
12-16-2005, 11:02 AM #28
I really hate to hear that man,
The best advice that I can give you is to forget about her and move on,
Hang out with your friends and continue on with life.
12-16-2005, 11:02 AM #29
I cant blame you for what you did, I just hope that the other guy knew about her situation. It would've been a shame if he was just some guy who didnt know any better and thought she was single, and now has permanent brain damage b/ of it. Sometimes emotions get the best of us, and I cant blame you really, I would've snapped too. Good luck to you, stay out of jail bro. Future reference, never date a stripper, THEY'RE ALL LIKE THAT!!!! Actually, most only want to be your freind if you have coke or money. Pieces of shit, every last one of them.
12-16-2005, 11:03 AM #30Originally Posted by USfighterFC
12-16-2005, 11:07 AM #31
I hope I dont get into shit with her father over this, her father was convicted of double manslaughter in a liquor store robbery back in 1984 and was freed 5 years ago. Her dad likes me a lot but always makes it known if anyone ever does anything to his daughter then there will be trouble. Hand to hand he doesnt stand a chance against me, but he would just shoot me. But he always took my side in arguments with her and says I must be the greatest guiy if i can put up with her shit. If he knew the reasons why i did what I did I think he would probably pat me on the back if anything. Her mother thinks I'm the best guy she ever met also. Everyone in her family thinks I'm a great guy cuz of all the good shit I've done for her and how i went above and beyond everything to help her out and was nothing but a positive influence in her life. they would be very very angry at her if they found out that she cheated on me.
12-16-2005, 11:10 AM #32
I know all this shit seems crazy as I read back on what I wrote and it is I never been involved with these kinds of people before and I promise never to do it again.
12-16-2005, 11:48 AM #33
bust her in the act.. u gotta see it to believe it
12-16-2005, 12:30 PM #34Originally Posted by USfighterFC
12-16-2005, 12:40 PM #35Originally Posted by USfighterFC
Last edited by timvds; 12-16-2005 at 12:43 PM.
12-16-2005, 12:42 PM #36Retired Vet
- Join Date
- Nov 2001
Hey man, fvck the dad I'll be there in Feb to sort that wimp out, lol..
12-16-2005, 01:23 PM #37
I might be tempted to call the dad and let him know why you tossed her out. Also letting him know that you won't stand for any more of her crap and you are sorry that you can't be around to talk to him or junior anymore. Kind of a nice knowin' ya but don't fkuc with me phone call. Keep it civil, you know she lied about why you tossed her out so if you care at all, that might be the way to go.
You are also going to want to change up your routine for a couple of weeks, park your car in a different spot or hide it at a friends house so she doesn't spike your tires or mess your paint.
Good luck, find an alebi so if the dipshit calls the cops you have something to fall back on.
12-16-2005, 01:42 PM #38
Sorry to hear that bro. I use to date strippers all the time. I have to admit that in the heat of the moment it was a lot of fun. However, my experiences were that they were usually messed up in the head and had some serious baggage that was going to negatively impact my life.
Hope all goes well.
Might not be a bad idea to call her Dad and let him know that the two of you parted. Play it classy and don't go in slinging mud. He will figure out who fvcked up.
Seriously, I hate to hear all that you had to go through. You will find someone better for you. Stay positive.
12-16-2005, 02:07 PM #39
Thanks for all the positive responses................i thought about calling her father and letting him know also. But honestly I'll let them sort it out. He knows his daughter and what she does (to an extent). If I really wanted to I can call him up and tell him the whole story and seriously **** her life up but I won't. If this goes on, it's her move, I'll let her decide how she wants to do this. Like tempbrit said it's all fun in the heat of the moment but it does **** with your head in the long run. I'm very much done with relationships at this point in time. It's sad because I was such a good guy with her but she really turned me into a monster with all the bullshit she put me through.
12-16-2005, 02:12 PM #40Originally Posted by stayinstacked
I thought about this also and I hope that it turns out that it's not the case. I hope he knew everything down to a "T". I went through this whole relationship feeling like a sucker.....even my mother said, "you must have sucker written all over your head." I'm sorry i didnt get out of this relationship sooner and I am a total ass for not getting out. I just liked being settled down and I thought that her having a kid it would mean a mature woman who is also ready to settle down. Shit was I wrong.
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