10-15-2002, 08:50 PM #1
Female friend problem, please give me your 2 cents
I liked this girl last year, to make this short the timing was never right and we have ended up being pretty close friends, at least I thought. Well anyway she has a job where she has the ability to pull people's credit reports because she is in sales.
I go an pull my credit report today becuase I am going to refinance my house and want to make sure everything looks good and see back in May that a full inquiry was made of my credit by her company. I have never done business with her company so I pretty much know it was her pulling the info without my permission. Funny thing is this happens two days after I take her and her best friend down to Baltimore to see a baseball game for her Birthday. I guess no good deed goes unpunished.
I found this out only today and it is 5 months after she did it. We have become much closer friends sinces then (nothing sexual). Should I not let it bother me? Or should I tell her I feel she breached my trust and I am pissed?
I don't know. I enjoy her friendship although I can't believe she would go through all my private financial information like that. Some freind huh? What would you do?
10-15-2002, 10:04 PM #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2002
I would be pissed. Its not none of her business.
10-15-2002, 10:07 PM #3
I'd kill her. Maybe that's just the Italian in me talkin.
10-15-2002, 11:49 PM #4
Fuck bro, I'd snap. I am the type of guy that if someone leaves something personal around, and there is no way in hell anyone would every find out that i look, i wouldn't cause i respect the privacy of others and i expect them to do the same. Give her shit, lots of it
10-16-2002, 12:00 AM #5
Come on now... she probably had some serious interest in you and was trying to learn more about you and your personality. Albeit it was a poor decsion since the number of times your credit gets checked can affect your report, as well as - IT IS NONE OF HER FRICKIN' BUSINESS.
Ask her. "I noticed that a credit report was ran 2 days after we met. From your company... do you know why?"
We have all done shit to find a little history on our prey... I mean girls we are trying to get with. She had easy access to some serious information and abused her privelages. I would ask her about it... or you will always have a deep grudge for someone that is a "good friend."
10-16-2002, 12:09 AM #6
Let her know up front that you know what she did . See her reaction to it. Obviously you'd be a fool to trust her now, but maybe later you can get over it. Don't be a bowl of jello.
10-16-2002, 12:20 AM #7
Well you know what is important to her. Does she have a true heart? Being a good looking guy with money is difficult sometimes when you want a girl to love you even if you were out of shape and broke. Go with your gut instinct and if she is just a friend then no problem. Keep on looking for the right one and meanwhile keep on enjoying the wrong one's.
10-16-2002, 07:07 AM #8
Thanks for all the feedback. I was really mad yesterday when I found out and I was not sure how to respond. I still think I will give it some more thought. One thing I am thinking about is that we are in MBA classes together for the next couple of years so I want to avoid making it too awkward because we are really helping each other out. I know that I worked for a collections department one time and had access to pull credit reports. Believe me I thought about pulling a few but never acted on it. Guess I am really disappointed. Thanks Again!
10-16-2002, 09:25 AM #9
If I were you I'd mention it to her. If you're as good of friends as you think you are you should be able to discuss it. Try not to put her on the defensive, just so it's out and you can get over it. You need to let her know that you are upset and that you value her friendship and don't want this to ruin it, but that you know about it and don't appreciate it. She had to know you'd find out eventually if you checked your credit rating.
10-16-2002, 10:30 AM #10
Many of you guys are way to forgiving, IMO. Consider this: would it bother you more if some anonymous company you had never heard of was digging into your personal information or if a close friend was? If you own a biz you should expect other people that you do business with to do this. It's for their own safety. Friends and relatives ( I'm assuming your companies are not doing biz ) have no need for your credit report. Lemme ask you this: how would you feel if your brother in law was snooping for your financial info?
I would do the same to her and hope she brought it up. I would do it with a few witnesses after I explained why I am doing this.
10-16-2002, 10:55 AM #11New Member
- Join Date
- May 2002
Doesnt she need your Social Security # to run it??
How did she get that??
10-16-2002, 12:47 PM #12
Her sales job is part time and we both work for a bank where I have my mortgage through. We have databases with the social security numbers and she can look up my loan by name and find the social on the mortgage system as well.
10-16-2002, 02:41 PM #13
IIRC everytime you pull your credit, it goes down just a tiny bit. Depending on how good or bad your credit is, it can be the difference for you getting a better interest rate. I think it's kind of messed up, and would talk to her about it.
10-29-2002, 12:06 PM #14Female Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2002
If you're such good friends, then forget about it. I mean whats the point of having a friend if you cant mess up every now and again?
10-29-2002, 12:39 PM #15
Ask her, if she lies, cut her throat....not really kill her but if she lies to you point blank she is not worth the title friend
10-29-2002, 05:16 PM #16
dude are you sure it was her? or are you just assuming? is she the only one that works there and couldve gotten that info? and if you are closer now how much closer does her freindship mean alot or no? there is alot of things you could consider is iot really gonna affect you in the future? you could lose a good frien or even more over this . i would bring it up but i dont think i would assualt her with it. just my opinion and i understand you feeling "violated" and after 5 months your report wont get hurt that much i think, you just gotta weigh everything you say this is only of course if she means something to you
10-29-2002, 06:00 PM #17
thats so lame, I would confront her, and ask her first if she did it, then I would ask her if she had any connections to clean up my credit report. Play the nice guy, you sure you dont kinda dig this young lady? If not, then work it for what its worth. If you like her that may be another story.
11-01-2002, 09:40 AM #18
Definately ask her but don't accuse her untill you know it was her for sure or you might ruin something for no reason. And if it turns out it was her ask her reasons for doing it and talk about it. Talking gets a lot done....UNLESS you dealing with your girlfriends ex...talking isn't worth a crap then, they just understand a fist in the mouth
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