Thread: one of my newer ones
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09-20-2004, 09:26 PM #1
one of my newer ones
Apparently, people believe my writing, both prose and poetry, is incredibly 'dark'...
Your murder preempted my suicide
Guilt intertwined such that neither of the blind can dissect
Careful planning where passion was absent as two letters
when the presence
open
On the one morning that beats the sun to the door?
Or unchecked passion against planning's half life
Patiently expired
Released
To you let go
For which the successful are not
Normally punished
My transgression still brings confinement
Though without the promise of observed interactions and earned privileges
Purgatory where closure was offered
I took the bait
And death will find me inconsiderately late
When all that life offers
Is the stench of sterility
And the daily reward of refrain
From vomiting on the white
I'm already there
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09-20-2004, 09:29 PM #2
entwined may serve you better than intertwined..
although i like it, i like it a lot. probably about as much as your other one.
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09-20-2004, 09:59 PM #3Originally Posted by chrisAdams
But long story short, i do agree that for flow of speech yours works better, but i'm a structuralist dammit; hear me roar!
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09-20-2004, 10:08 PM #4
i'm an auralist.
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09-20-2004, 10:32 PM #5Originally Posted by chrisAdams
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09-20-2004, 10:39 PM #6
whoa, what the fawk?
Is this AR?
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09-21-2004, 05:14 AM #7
Pretty heavy stuff there BG. More walks in the sunshine for you young man.
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09-21-2004, 01:31 PM #8"Rock" of Love ;)
- Join Date
- Apr 2002
- Posts
- 4,130
Its a great day to be alive!!!!!!
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09-21-2004, 01:56 PM #9Originally Posted by Juggy Snout
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09-21-2004, 01:59 PM #10Originally Posted by BigGreen
On another note; I got the ARFF stuff cleared up....got them on the phone, good thing because I did pay for four leagues, but everything is good to go now.
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09-21-2004, 02:18 PM #11Originally Posted by Juggy Snout
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09-21-2004, 02:22 PM #12
Man, you really need a hug. Unfortunately, I'm incapable of expressing emotion. I hope you find someone else to comfort you, you sick and twisted deviant.
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09-21-2004, 02:33 PM #13
Can you write my Obit???
Originally Posted by BigGreen
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09-21-2004, 02:35 PM #14Originally Posted by TexasFitnessGirl
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09-21-2004, 02:45 PM #15Originally Posted by rambo
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09-21-2004, 02:46 PM #16Originally Posted by TexasFitnessGirl
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09-21-2004, 02:51 PM #17Originally Posted by BigGreen
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