Very confusing situaiton with a girl

**Spyder** · 01-05-2007, 02:13 AM

Okay usually i don't really have much of a problem understanding girls, girls my age anyway, but this situation is really confusing/bothering me, hope you guys can help. My buddies don't really have much to say about it either. The girl is 21 and i'm 22, we have everything in common and yes i am very attracted to her(i have told her), she also told me that she felt the same way. Infact when i told her, i said in the exact words "I really like u, i hope it's not too forward and i know you have very strict parents but i hope you feel the same way" then she said "Oh wow, why did it take you so long, and my parents don't really care who i date aslong as they are nice, and yes i feel the same way". She is very smart, good looking and has never had a boyfriend. We talk for hours and hours, conversation is so easy because we have so much in common and we cna hold a conversation for hours literally. I've never met a girl who i feel so attracted to and connected to, so i did what any man would do in such a situation(a few weeks later) and ask if she wants to start a relaitionship, (nothing serious just a girlfriend and boyfriend thing) and to my surprise she said "i don't know"(as far as i know, this means no). When i asked why, she simply said "i don't want to have to lie to my parents, they only let me me date guys of the same nationality". Okay fair enough, i already expected this as i am bosnian and she is albanian, and albanian families are usually like that. Why on earth would she do something like this, don't forget that a few weeks ago she said her parents are cool with it. I've never felt so much pain in my life, because it was so unexpected and i was so sure about it. For months after that i was depressed as hell, my motivation for everything just dissapeared, even lifting(i didnt think it was possible, ive been training since the age of 13). It's been about 5 months now, and i still can't make any sense of it, neither can anybody i know. It is killing me and i cannot move on, everytime i'm tlaking to another girl, i think of her, it's pretty much all i think about these days. Has anybody got any advice for me? What would you do in the situation?

**Spyder** · 01-05-2007, 02:19 AM

Please delete thread, wrong forum sorry. Theres another one in the lounge

**Jason865** · 01-05-2007, 02:26 AM

You really have to be a man and stop this crap. At 22 you need to be dating many women. She is gone, move on.

**donniebrasco** · 01-05-2007, 08:20 AM

is your avatar a cross between hitler and schumacher?

**yourmom** · 01-05-2007, 08:26 AM

You need to get laid. I had the same problem a few years back. I just stated going out more. Be confident, they will come to you. You da man.

**technomarine_888** · 02-09-2007, 01:21 AM

humm...

LOL at cross bet Hitler and Schumi..

**aolsux00** · 02-11-2007, 03:06 AM

Dude, you dont want a girl like that anyways. Just imagine how much more shit would come up later if you went out with her. My friend went out with this girl for 2 years and she broke up with him because she couldn't marry him because he is a different nationality and religion. Just go out and meet other girls, its going to take a while and its not easy, but I don't think you have any other options, and just remember bro:

Don't chase a b*tch, when you can replace a b*tch

**Intruder** · 02-11-2007, 08:45 AM

Originally Posted by aolsux00

Don't chase a b*tch, when you can replace a b*tch

Words to live by.
When I was around 24 I let a woman screw my head all up. Got all depressed and crazy. We both cared about each other is was just the situation we were both in at the time. It really pissed me off that I let myself get that way. I swore it would never happen again and it hasn't. I moved on but I knew in the back of my mind she was the one. After about 6 months she calls we get together and fast forward 10+ years we are married with two kids and thing are great. If its meant to be it will happen.

**Chitown Raider** · 02-11-2007, 11:10 AM

Originally Posted by Intruder

After about 6 months she calls we get together and fast forward 10+ years we are married with two kids and thing are great. If its meant to be it will happen.

Wow, too bad there can't be more happy endings like yours.

**Intruder** · 02-11-2007, 11:33 AM

Originally Posted by Chitown Raider

Wow, too bad there can't be more happy endings like yours.

Don't get me wrong we have are problems as all relationships do sometimes I want to strangle her and sometimes she feels the same about me. In the end everything worked out well. I wouldn't change the way things happened.

**Chitown Raider** · 02-11-2007, 11:45 AM

Originally Posted by Intruder

Don't get me wrong we have are problems as all relationships do sometimes I want to strangle her and sometimes she feels the same about me. In the end everything worked out well. I wouldn't change the way things happened.

I totally understand we are only human after all. I was just thinking when I read your post that sometimes too many relationships never get a chance to give it another shot when two people really like each other.

**Spyder** · 02-13-2007, 07:27 AM

Originally Posted by donniebrasco

is your avatar a cross between hitler and schumacher?

It is indeed Schumacher photoshopped to look like Hitler lol.

**Spyder** · 02-13-2007, 07:29 AM

Originally Posted by Intruder

Words to live by.
When I was around 24 I let a woman screw my head all up. Got all depressed and crazy. We both cared about each other is was just the situation we were both in at the time. It really pissed me off that I let myself get that way. I swore it would never happen again and it hasn't. I moved on but I knew in the back of my mind she was the one. After about 6 months she calls we get together and fast forward 10+ years we are married with two kids and thing are great. If its meant to be it will happen.

Wow, i've never heard of an ending like that before, impressive.

**Superhuman** · 02-13-2007, 01:23 PM

Hey man... if she's too weak to stand up to her nationalist, elitist parents then she is not right for you. If my parents told me I could only date Russians or Germans I would have a long conversation with them about it and if they still said no then I would tell them to f*ck off. If she likes you she will be with you. WTF makes Albanians so damned special? That's bullshit. Bosnians are cooler anyway... you should go find a hot Turkish girl bro

**Chitown Raider** · 02-13-2007, 04:13 PM

Originally Posted by Superhuman

Hey man... if she's too weak to stand up to her nationalist, elitist parents then she is not right for you. If my parents told me I could only date Russians or Germans I would have a long conversation with them about it and if they still said no then I would tell them to f*ck off. If she likes you she will be with you. WTF makes Albanians so damned special? That's bullshit. Bosnians are cooler anyway... you should go find a hot Turkish girl bro

I had a buddy who was dating this Greek chick years ago. Her parents were from the old country. Because he was not Greek he could never go into her house, and there was never any chance of them getting married. Talk about a bunch of B.S.

**Superhuman** · 02-13-2007, 04:21 PM

Originally Posted by Chitown Raider

I had a buddy who was dating this Greek chick years ago. Her parents were from the old country. Because he was not Greek he could never go into her house, and there was never any chance of them getting married. Talk about a bunch of B.S.

That's Hitler shit... trying to maintain the "purity" of the race. Whatever

**Chitown Raider** · 02-13-2007, 04:48 PM

Originally Posted by Superhuman

That's Hitler shit... trying to maintain the "purity" of the race. Whatever

I know I was like apparently they don't realize what country they are living in.

**Spyder** · 02-13-2007, 10:35 PM

Originally Posted by Superhuman

That's Hitler shit... trying to maintain the "purity" of the race. Whatever

Yeah they all think they are unique and 'pure', when at the end of the day they are only human like the rest of us. Nonetheless, i'm coming to the United States in a few months, to buy a car(Dodge Viper) and ill probably fall in love with it lol. Screw women, atleast cars don't care what country you were born in.

**technomarine_888** · 02-15-2007, 08:59 PM

Uh ohh.. schumi-hitler screwing a viper ? that doesn't sound right..

**Spyder** · 02-16-2007, 08:12 AM

Originally Posted by technomarine_888

Uh ohh.. schumi-hitler screwing a viper ? that doesn't sound right..

hahahhahhaha oh man

**pip_squeek** · 02-19-2007, 08:27 PM

her loss bud ur 2 good for her. just pump iron mate i promise you will get over her plus muscles = more chix

**Chitown Raider** · 02-19-2007, 09:01 PM

Originally Posted by pip_squeek

her loss bud ur 2 good for her. just pump iron mate i promise you will get over her plus muscles = more chix

You got that right! Plus summer will be here before you know it.

**Spyder** · 02-22-2007, 07:16 AM

Originally Posted by pip_squeek

her loss bud ur 2 good for her. just pump iron mate i promise you will get over her plus muscles = more chix

Thanks mate

advice taken. It's funny how i got more advice in this section of the forums regarding this issue then in the Lounge.

**orton4** · 02-22-2007, 10:48 AM

spyder i think you jumped the gun askin her out... as david deangelo... a dating genious you started to get wussy... its a mistake a lot of guys make... you should invest in some of his writings... you hafta constantly be cocky funny with girls to keep them attracted.... i dont think it was a race thing really.... if she really liked you like she said she did it wouldnt matter to her...

**Spyder** · 02-22-2007, 11:05 PM

Originally Posted by orton4

spyder i think you jumped the gun askin her out... as david deangelo... a dating genious you started to get wussy... its a mistake a lot of guys make... you should invest in some of his writings... you hafta constantly be cocky funny with girls to keep them attracted.... i dont think it was a race thing really.... if she really liked you like she said she did it wouldnt matter to her...

Thanks, ill look into it. He has eBooks, sweet.

**Rsox1** · 03-14-2007, 05:15 AM

cocky funny works like a charm

**Tank75** · 04-09-2007, 12:06 AM

I'm kind of in the same boat as you... i really liked this girl on the track team that I compete on. Anyway, we start talking and I think everything is going well... I start focusing more on my time with her than on my training... my bench went from 405 to 345 in a matter of 8 months and I lost about 50lbs (trying to look better for her... I was a thrower and fat). But anyway, a few weeks ago, I find her drunk with this dude and it totally messed with my head.

I figure it's her loss. You did what you could with the situation, if you meant to her what she meant to you it would work out... unfortunately that may not be the case. All you can do is your best with the time you're given. You have to be able to take the situation for what it is and try to find the good in it. I'm sure you learned a little bit about yourself and learned that most women will confuse the hell out of you and leave you feeling many things at once.

But anyways, I've gotten my training back in order and things are slowly getting better... almost back to competing more on a national level again. Get back into the gym and start taking control of the things you can control. The best way to feel better is to focus on something else that's positive for the time being and let time take care of the rest. Also, you can't go moping around because women dig confidence... I lost my little philly to some cocky arogant pole vaulter that honestly treats her like garbage... but for some reason, women seem to dig that.

A girl that is right for you is out there. You're still young, don't give up the good fight.

**Chitown Raider** · 04-09-2007, 04:11 PM

Originally Posted by Tank75

Also, you can't go moping around because women dig confidence... I lost my little philly to some cocky arogant pole vaulter that honestly treats her like garbage... but for some reason, women seem to dig that.

That is right, women like the bad boy.

**Dr. Zeus** · 04-09-2007, 06:38 PM

Dude, you shouldn't have gotten all open and emotional with her, talking about feelings and relationships and shit.

Women seek emotional validation the same way men seek pussy. Once they get it, they're off to their next conquest. You gave it up too early.

The only way to get this one back is to start dating other women. Once she finds out you don't need her anymore she'll come running back with no thought to what her parents think.

**UberSteroids** · 04-10-2007, 05:08 PM

Man, if this was the reason that her parent would not be alright with it because You are not the same nationality. Well she looks too much at what her parents think or like. If the girl can't go by HER OWN feelings, becuase she looks at what other people think... than trust me.. You don't want none of it. It supose to be about You two and noone else. Even if You think this was not the real reason, oh well, You will never find out, whatever the reason was, answer was NO. Can You imagine beeing with someone like this later on in life? Forget it.. big struggle.
Like other guys said, MOVE ON! Get back to the gym, do You thing, go out, talk to women... so many of them out there. Don't limit Yourself like this dude!
Now, man up, cut the sh!t and start talking to women.
It was not meant to be for You two to be together...done deal!
And also with expressing the feelings, like said in post obove, don't give it out all too early, just little by little. Don't open all the way right away.
Just wait, You'll meet some hot girl soon, be in bed with her before You know it, and think about all this here..and laugh about it

Life is good man so forget about it and MOVE on.. I am sure she did! Good luck!

**suzuki99** · 04-14-2007, 01:40 PM

just go out, 'meat' new girls and get over her. you cant fall for one girl and think thats the one, your 22 same age as me and i know i aint about to marry or fall inlove now im all about ****ing every hot piece of ass in sight.

**matt50** · 05-06-2007, 09:08 AM

Originally Posted by Intruder

Words to live by.
When I was around 24 I let a woman screw my head all up. Got all ***ressed and crazy. We both cared about each other is was just the situation we were both in at the time. It really pissed me off that I let myself get that way. I swore it would never happen again and it hasn't. I moved on but I knew in the back of my mind she was the one. After about 6 months she calls we get together and fast forward 10+ years we are married with two kids and thing are great. If its meant to be it will happen.

wow good for you....you may be the first person i've heard a story like this about....thats one thing everyone looks past...if is meant to be it will happen...people try to make things happen and unfortunately its a woman's world lol

**Foskamink** · 05-06-2007, 10:14 AM

Originally Posted by aolsux00

Don't chase a b*tch, when you can replace a b*tch

realist words ever spoke

**Dude-Man** · 05-06-2007, 10:36 AM

If you love her so much, convert to islam. I assume that's what her parents' problem is?

**Pooks** · 05-06-2007, 10:54 AM

Sounds like a good reason for war! LETS GO!

**1buffsob** · 05-06-2007, 11:25 AM

Old thread. He better have gotten over it by now. LOL

**briancb1** · 05-06-2007, 06:16 PM

Originally Posted by Rsox1

cocky funny works like a charm

It works pretty good. ***ends on you and the girl. I just told a hot girl the other night, "if I had a cookie, I would give it to you" and gave her a look like "oh yea, I'm the man, I just said it - what now?"
I was hammered and I thought it was funny (somewhat retarded now that im sober), she ended up just kissing me with her fvking hot DSL lips and said "your cute". Hopefully I wasn't guy #98 of the night to be kissed, now that I think of it.

**king6** · 05-06-2007, 06:19 PM

Damnit, stop bumping this old ass thread.

**IronReload04** · 05-06-2007, 08:34 PM

hey spidy, if your out there, so what happened with this chick after uh 5 months.

My 2 cents

this is the truest thing

lets say the situation was in reverse, it was your parents that didnt accept her nationality......If you liked her enough, you would say screw you mom and dad......If she tried to persuade you to be with her, how much do you like her if you said, welp, sorry, parents say no