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  1. #1
    KunipshunFit's Avatar
    KunipshunFit is offline Lounge Lizard
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    Joke of the day (to make up for yesterday's botched picture)

    Some ground rules to help people determine if the sex
    counted. This list of rules can also be very helpful to
    determine if you have cheated on your spouse or
    significant other.

    1. Oral Sex does not count.
    2. If you can't remember the person's name the following
    day, doesn't count
    3. If you failed to call the person back to have more
    sex, doesn't count
    4. If neither of you achieved orgasm, doesn't count
    5. Sex with a friend, doesn't count, it's just another
    thing you share
    6. If the act was so lame, you leave thinking "did I
    shave my legs for this", doesn't count
    7. An old flame, doesn't count
    8. An ex-spouse, doesn't count ,refer to this as a "pity
    fuck"
    9. Masturbating in front of someone while they do the
    same, sorry, not sex
    10. Cyber-sex - NO FUCKIN WAY - this is glorified
    masturbation
    11. 2 heterosexual women having fun, not sex
    12. kissing is not cheating
    13. an act to make a married person feel good about
    themselves, not sex, BUT only if you do not know their
    significant other
    14. an act committed while you were intoxicated, doesn't
    count
    15. an act committed with a family member of your
    significant other, doesn't count, this should be
    referred to as "a skeleton in the family closet"
    16. acts committed in a public place, doesn't count (why
    should it, it was fun right?)
    17. phone sex, doesn't count, refer back to "glorified
    masturbation"
    18. in car, doesn't count, way to cramped, if vehicle is
    in motion and has a console or stick shift, this counts,
    way to kinky and erotic not to count, unless the act
    was totally oral, then refer back to rule #1
    19. an act committed in which the female of the encounter
    did not achieve total satisfaction (orgasm), doesn't
    count
    20. an act committed in whi
    21. an act in which no kissing takes place, doesn't
    count (not considered to be intimate)
    22. an act in which "you do all the work", doesn't count
    23. an act committed with your next door neighbor,
    doesn't count, this should be referred to as "being
    neighborly"
    24. an act committed with an acquaintance because you are
    angry with your significant other doesn't count
    25. an act which only happens on a random basis, doesn't
    count, this should be considered a "fuck friend"

    SEX does count if a pregnancy results!

  2. #2
    painintheazz's Avatar
    painintheazz is offline Anabolic Member
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    I am happy to see 5, 12, 14 and 24 on there.

    Pain

  3. #3
    KunipshunFit's Avatar
    KunipshunFit is offline Lounge Lizard
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    ROFLMAO...yeah i read that list, and was like...woah...um i'm a virgin again nah, just kiddin...but yeah i read it and i was like...damn....

    oh and notice the girl getting her's is on there twice!! Making a point perhaps???

    K'Fit

  4. #4
    painintheazz's Avatar
    painintheazz is offline Anabolic Member
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    Originally posted by KunipshunFit
    oh and notice the girl getting her's is on there twice!! Making a point perhaps???

    K'Fit
    Hell ya.

    Pain

  5. #5
    FKITLETSGO's Avatar
    FKITLETSGO is offline Senior Member
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    im a virgin who has busted a nut in someone(with a condom of course) like 300 times

  6. #6
    monstercojones's Avatar
    monstercojones is offline The Anabolic Assassin
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    thank god. this list exonerates me. im a good guy again. thanks k'fit.

  7. #7
    kc's Avatar
    kc
    kc is offline Female Member
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    what about the zip code rule

  8. #8
    Terinox's Avatar
    Terinox is offline The One & Only
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    Nice nice!

  9. #9
    peam's Avatar
    peam is offline Suspended
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    so.... I'll be waiting for the list of what cheating really IS since it seems... nothing is or maybe that was the point of the joke.... okay... now I'm beginning to feel stupid... must delete post...

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