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  1. #1
    Flagg's Avatar
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    Stag Night connundrum

    So my soon to be brother in law is getting married to my Sister next month. His best man, a friend of my from years back (10 years ago) is planning a huge night out, all the old gang, me and a load of guys that hadn't seen each other in a decade. So we all met up in a pub on Thursday night to plan the evening.

    Now the only thing is, the Best Man doesn't want my Dad to go along, for a few obvious reasons. Thing is, for some reason my soon to be Brother in Law's Dad and his Uncle are going. So I don't exactly know how to not invite my Dad, as I think he assumes he is coming. In all honesty, I don't know why the grooms Dad and Uncle are going and I don't really want to lie and say "it's just me and my friends".

    I'm really looking forward to the night, but this is all shit I seem to have to sort out now. Plus, the head bridesmaid, who is incidently out tonight with my Sister on a Hen night, wants me to invite her boyfriend along. I don't even know this guy, and I feel i'll be left baby sitting this dude for the whole evening!

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    Stag Night conundrums... there's an app for that.

  3. #3
    Flagg's Avatar
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    Now I need a iPhone to download it. Problem solved!

  4. #4
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    Definitely don`t bring the dude you don`t know as for your dad it is probably best he doesn`t see what happens.

  5. #5
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    Bro that sounds like a tough situation, I would never want to make my old man feel unwanted, because I know he would never make me feel that way. Especially if the in-laws dad is going. For me either I would invite my dad or I just wouldn't go.

  6. #6
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    everyone will be so pissed they wont give a fvck whats going on. jez i was best man for my cousins stag do over in Newcastle, never saw them for half the w'end, even ended up in Durham with some dirty bit the second night and managed to stagger on to the plane just in the nick of time the next morning! lol

  7. #7
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    hmmmm.... not sure why anyone would ever want to invite their dad to a stag party? was the best man for my buddy, and his stag party, like most I would imagine, was a drunken orgy fest with multiple strippers. if my father was there, it would have been akward.

    Unfortunately, he has never been able to step out of the "father" role and into a "buddy" role with me. Which is probably why I'd be uncomfortable.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    hmmmm.... not sure why anyone would ever want to invite their dad to a stag party? was the best man for my buddy, and his stag party, like most I would imagine, was a drunken orgy fest with multiple strippers. if my father was there, it would have been akward.

    Unfortunately, he has never been able to step out of the "father" role and into a "buddy" role with me. Which is probably why I'd be uncomfortable.
    believe it or not, but when i was bouncing in a lap bar, one evening a daughter brought her FATHER in for a lap dance for his birthday, one of the bar staff knew them. how weird and sick is that?!

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    Times Roman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    believe it or not, but when i was bouncing in a lap bar, one evening a daughter brought her FATHER in for a lap dance for his birthday, one of the bar staff knew them. how weird and sick is that?!
    a daughter involved in her father's sexual entertainment? not sure about that..........

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    dec11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    a daughter involved in her father's sexual entertainment? not sure about that..........
    yeah, weird set up

  11. #11
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    Father, father-inlaw, uncles and such especially the older crowd all need to go home after the nice little dinner and a couple of drinks and the boys are left to go out on the town and play. You dont want anyone who might feel obligated to share with the bride or anyone else such as the maid of honors BF anything that may get back to the bride and cause problems for them later.

    As for the father/daughter discussion, yeah weird, awkward and??? Maybe she just has a good sense of humor same as some kids will buy their mother or??? one of those stripper grams at some point. I'm sure the imagination can come up with all sort of scenarios but we will probably never know the truth and it doesnt affect us in any way either.

  12. #12
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    If he was marrying my sister there is nothing he would be doing on the stag night that my dad couldn't see. Otherwise he wouldn't be marrying my sister.

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    Quote Originally Posted by spoonta66 View Post
    If he was marrying my sister there is nothing he would be doing on the stag night that my dad couldn't see. Otherwise he wouldn't be marrying my sister.
    Why? It's her choice, not yours. Hope she can make a decent decision on her own unless you also plan on picking the guy she marries? Who knows, your sister may be at a stag party giving a BJ to one of the stripper guys at the same time. Hopefully they are better matched than you know and you have to let them make they own judgment calls and mistakes up to a point.

    I find most guys who are over protective about their sister are usually worse than the guys they are protecting them from. LOL

    Bachelor parties are for the immediate friends of the groom and wedding party excluding fathers.

  14. #14
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    I guess you would be happy for your sister to marry a guy who ****ed a whore on his stag night? **** that. I'd knock his front teeth out for disrespecting her like that. Have fun, strippers etc etc but going too far is going too far.

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    Quote Originally Posted by spoonta66 View Post
    I guess you would be happy for your sister to marry a guy who ****ed a whore on his stag night? **** that. I'd knock his front teeth out for disrespecting her like that. Have fun, strippers etc etc but going too far is going too far.
    It's better than him doing it the night after the got married. LOL I let my sister make her own choices. I'm not her keeper unless she asks for help. More times than not when you stick your nose in where it's not invited it will get snipped off. It's usually the messenger who gets shot. You will end up being the bad guy, not him. If he cheats on her she made a bad choice and more than likely nothing you do/say will change that. Sometimes you have to leave well enough alone. Who knows, they may be the perfect couple and have a perfectly happy marriage/future and you could screw it all up because of one simple drunken mistake before marriage? You never know what the future holds.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Father, father-inlaw, uncles and such especially the older crowd all need to go home after the nice little dinner and a couple of drinks and the boys are left to go out on the town and play. You dont want anyone who might feel obligated to share with the bride or anyone else such as the maid of honors BF anything that may get back to the bride and cause problems for them later.

    As for the father/daughter discussion, yeah weird, awkward and??? Maybe she just has a good sense of humor same as some kids will buy their mother or??? one of those stripper grams at some point. I'm sure the imagination can come up with all sort of scenarios but we will probably never know the truth and it doesnt affect us in any way either.
    This is exactly what I had in mind, When I heard the grooms Dad and Uncle was going, I thought that was a little strange, then it occured to me that does this mean I feel obligated to bring my old man, which the Best Man doesnt think is a good idea. Im more than happy for them to go for a dinner, then send em packing so the boys can get on with the night!

    @Spoon, LovByts is right. I mean damn, me and my friends are going to look after the groom. We've been friends for like, 20 years and he is marrying my sister. Of course there is going to be drinks, rowdiness and strippers, all of which my sister WONT be finding out about. Damn, do you think he is going to run off with a stripper at the end and never be seen again? We're going to be putting him into a mankini the whole night so yeah, it's going to be pretty obvious its a Stag Night.

    The point is, if the Grooms uncle and dad is going, I feel a bit of a tool not to invite my Dad. Hence why im trying to suggest that they only come out for a meal, which im more than happy for my Dad to attend!

    EDIT: Well just spoke to the best man who said "Yes, Barry's (the groom) Dad and Uncle are up for the whole night. I mean wtf?! Why do they want to come out for the whole night? And im expected to try and say to my Dad "er no, you can't come"
    Last edited by Flagg; 10-09-2011 at 05:31 AM.

  17. #17
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    I think this is a strange part of your (US?) culture.
    Stag night is like a bachelor night?
    Why?
    Last chance to .......do what before u get married?
    I donīt get it. Get wasted, strippers, instead of spending the last few days with the love of your life, together preparing for the big day.
    ...and what is the soon to be wife doing on this night?
    Jeez...the last thing I would want before I marry soulmate is for her to go out and get wasted having some male stripper in a thong all over her.

    OP, only u now your relationship with your Dad.
    I definitely would have brought mine!
    Being left out, of anything, blows.

  18. #18
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    Flier, I think i've got it sorted.

    I think there is a meal, but he's already said he's happy to go to that, have one drink and go, as I think the prospect of lots of bars does not appeal to him!

    And haha, it's just a bit of fun. It's not like soon to be brother in law is going to fvck a stripper! I completely trust him and know he wouldn't do anything unfaithful. It's just the girls. My sister doesn't want anything like lap dances, strippers, heavy drinking and all that sort of thing to go on. Well, she is on a need to know basis! haha, i dont mean that in any disrespect at all. I love my sister, but girls make a big deal out of nothing. Some guys go with this "last chance to do something" but this night is not going like that. It's a group of lads, that mostly havent seen each other, having a lads night and sending their mate off in a good way.

    Well my Dad is sorted, but i still find it strange that the Grooms Dad and Uncle is staying out all night, but aw well!

    EDIT: As for my Sister, she went out on her Hen night last night with friends and family. What they did, I don't know, but that's all for them! I did hear some guy younger than me kept trynna dance with my Mum, but ahhh...it's just all good fun.
    Last edited by Flagg; 10-09-2011 at 06:13 AM.

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flagg View Post
    This is exactly what I had in mind, When I heard the grooms Dad and Uncle was going, I thought that was a little strange, then it occured to me that does this mean I feel obligated to bring my old man, which the Best Man doesnt think is a good idea. Im more than happy for them to go for a dinner, then send em packing so the boys can get on with the night!

    @Spoon, LovByts is right. I mean damn, me and my friends are going to look after the groom. We've been friends for like, 20 years and he is marrying my sister. Of course there is going to be drinks, rowdiness and strippers, all of which my sister WONT be finding out about. Damn, do you think he is going to run off with a stripper at the end and never be seen again? We're going to be putting him into a mankini the whole night so yeah, it's going to be pretty obvious its a Stag Night.

    The point is, if the Grooms uncle and dad is going, I feel a bit of a tool not to invite my Dad. Hence why im trying to suggest that they only come out for a meal, which im more than happy for my Dad to attend!

    EDIT: Well just spoke to the best man who said "Yes, Barry's (the groom) Dad and Uncle are up for the whole night. I mean wtf?! Why do they want to come out for the whole night? And im expected to try and say to my Dad "er no, you can't come"
    Of course they are up for it; they want to be one of the boys but they need to realize at some point they arent 20 anymore and some things are better left alone. They have had their fun in the past, now it's your turn. Just tell them respectfully not everyone is comfortable with them coming all night. You dont have to say who.

    Quote Originally Posted by Flier View Post
    I think this is a strange part of your (US?) culture.
    Stag night is like a bachelor night?
    Why?
    Last chance to .......do what before u get married?
    I donīt get it. Get wasted, strippers, instead of spending the last few days with the love of your life, together preparing for the big day.
    ...and what is the soon to be wife doing on this night?
    Jeez...the last thing I would want before I marry soulmate is for her to go out and get wasted having some male stripper in a thong all over her.

    OP, only u now your relationship with your Dad.
    I definitely would have brought mine!
    Being left out, of anything, blows.
    Most of the time the whole night out, stripper thing is really an excuse for everyone else to go out and have fun. It's rare the groom ever hooks up with anyone. It's more of a traditional guys last night out being wild and stupid since most wives frown on that stuff after marriage.

    The bride and groom have probably been planning (she plans, he says yes dear) the wedding for several months if not longer so I would hope they have spent some good quality time together. What significance does the last night or typically if they are smart 2 days before the wedding matter? They are going to be spending the next 7 1/2 years together before divorce. LOL That use to be the typical number but I think it's closer to 3 years now. Hopefully not. Best of luck to them both.
    Last edited by lovbyts; 10-09-2011 at 06:52 AM.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Of course they are up for it; they want to be one of the boys but they need to realize at some point they arent 20 anymore and some things are better left alone. They have had their fun in the past, now it's your turn. Just tell them respectfully not everyone is comfortable with them coming all night. You dont have to say who.



    Most of the time the whole night out, stripper thing is really an excuse for everyone else to go out and have fun. It's rare the groom ever hooks up with anyone. It's more of a traditional guys last night out being wild and stupid since most wives frown on that stuff after marriage.

    The bride and groom have probably been planning (she plans, he says yes dear) the wedding for several months if not longer so I would hope they have spent some good quality time together. What significance does the last night or typically if they are smart 2 days before the wedding matter? They are going to be spending the next 7 1/2 years together before divorce. LOL That use to be the typical number but I think it's closer to 3 years now. Hopefully not. Best of luck to them both.



    All of this, x100. Some of you guys need to relax, you would think we are organising some sort of wild night of sex for the groom before he marries my sister!

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    Flier's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flagg View Post
    [/B]

    All of this, x100. Some of you guys need to relax, you would think we are organising some sort of wild night of sex for the groom before he marries my sister!
    I donīt know man, Iīve seen "The Hangover".

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flagg View Post
    [/B]

    All of this, x100. Some of you guys need to relax, you would think we are organising some sort of wild night of sex for the groom before he marries my sister!
    i dont think they understand what a stag do is this part of the world mate lol

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flier View Post
    I think this is a strange part of your (US?) culture.
    Stag night is like a bachelor night?
    Why?
    Last chance to .......do what before u get married?
    I donīt get it. Get wasted, strippers, instead of spending the last few days with the love of your life, together preparing for the big day.
    ...and what is the soon to be wife doing on this night?
    Jeez...the last thing I would want before I marry soulmate is for her to go out and get wasted having some male stripper in a thong all over her.

    OP, only u now your relationship with your Dad.
    I definitely would have brought mine!
    Being left out, of anything, blows.
    everything for the wedding should be planned and taken care of.
    The bride usually has a night out with the girls and they get wild too.

  24. #24
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    I agree it should be for the groom and his friends. I think its weird for the fathers to be there. It more appropriate for the grooms father to go if they have that relationship.

    But after my cousins bachelor party a large fight happened and he doesnt talk to me or his brother anymore. His wifes brother came to the bachlor party and apparently told everything to her. My cousin did absolutely nothing. We had stripper/escorts. He got no dances at all or did anything. But something happened after and she made him choose.

    Its how the woman is also. I've gone to strip bars with friend after being married. My wife doesnt care. She will text me if im having fun and dont get too many dances.

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    Some nerve... How are they going to tell you that your father can't come, but theirs can... Regardless if your dad wants to go or not, that's flat out disrespectful for them to not allow him.

    If it were me I'd tell them to go fvck themselves... It's gotta be a terrible feeling for a father to know that the opposite parents were welcome and you weren't.. I could never do that to my old man

    I think the dinner and go idea is great for the parents... After that, its a little weird having them there

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    i would never being my dad to strip bar. I dont want him to possibly see his future daughter naked

  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    i would never being my dad to strip bar. I dont want him to possibly see his future daughter naked
    Or worse buying dances from his current daughter in-law. LOL

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flagg View Post
    Now I need a iPhone to download it. Problem solved!
    hahahaha!

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