Unfortunate masturbation stories?

[Angel of death]

Anyone?Well I've never been caught, but I just blew an unexpectedly violent load and landed some on my keyboard. ****KK the keys r sticking

[bossman_1986]

[Older lifter]

Hahahahahaa. were you lookin at Freaks Bo*b thread at the time...lmao

[rhino1]

Anyone?Well I've never been caught, but I just blew an unexpectedly violent load and landed some on my keyboard. ****KK the keys r sticking

lol...

was getting blown and it gagged my girlfriend at that time so she yanked her head back and it shot some where....

WE COULDNT FIND IT....

Well....her dad found it the next day...On the wall...he was like..."who sneezed on the wall?"

[legobricks]

dont ya hate those?

No real unfortunate masturbation stories but i did have my mother walk in my room while getting a BJ from my gfriend at the family Christmas party back when i was 17. Talk about embarassing!

[Angel of death]

lol...was getting blown and it gagged my girlfriend at that time so she yanked her head back and it shot some where....WE COULDNT FIND IT....Well....her dad found it the next day...On the wall...he was like..."who sneezed on the wall?"

lmao that reminds me of theres something about mary when its on his ear. at least is wasnt on your ear

[rhino1]

It was around that time when that move came out...I checked my ear...and hers...

[Phate]

dont ya hate those?

No real unfortunate masturbation stories but i did have my mother walk in my room while getting a BJ from my gfriend at the family Christmas party back when i was 17. Talk about embarassing!

LOL, same, though i was in the middle of pounding the shvt out of this girl and my mom walked in, lol, i didn't even notice till i hear, "guess ya'll are busy, i'll come back later", then the door closed, i actually had to stop for a second cause i started laughing so hard when i realized what had happened

[Amorphic]

i got a blowjob on a bus on the way to a concert i was going to see. girl had her head under a blanket and i was rolling with it. i looked over and across on the other side of the bus this greasy looking 40 something year old was locked on me.

my dink sank like the titanic, it was awful

[Phate]

i got a blowjob on a bus on the way to a concert i was going to see. girl had her head under a blanket and i was rolling with it. i looked over and across on the other side of the bus this greasy looking 40 something year old was locked on me.

my dink sank like the titanic, it was awful

LOL, that's hilarious, back in high school i used to love band trips for obvious reasons, some real freaks in band, anyway, i was getting a blowjob in the back seat on the way back from a game and all of a sudden the lights come on...yeah you can imagine the rest

[legobricks]

i got a blowjob on a bus on the way to a concert i was going to see. girl had her head under a blanket and i was rolling with it. i looked over and across on the other side of the bus this greasy looking 40 something year old was locked on me.

my dink sank like the titanic, it was awful

LOL so the "unfortunate masturbation story" was acutally this 40 year old dude rubbin his junk to u getting a little dome.

Classy!

[Older lifter]

lol so the "unfortunate masturbation story" was acutally this 40 year old dude rubbin his junk to u getting a little dome.

Classy!:aagreen22

lmfao.............

[Amorphic]

LOL so the "unfortunate masturbation story" was acutally this 40 year old dude rubbin his junk to u getting a little dome.

Classy!

you know it, thats how i roll.

[Dizz28]

i was beating the meat and i looked over, My cat was watching me....that's GD creepy, lemme tell you

[rhino1]

i was beating the meat and i looked over, My cat was watching me....that's GD creepy, lemme tell you

lol...Getting a bj one time and felt somthing fuzzy right as i came and the girl realized it was her dog and he was going for a peice and right then I came right as she tried to knock him away and he got it in the face...

I was laying back i didnt know what was going on at the time

[gst528i]

^^^^ lol .. wow that dog must hate you....


I was giving it doggy style to my ex girl. Thought i had the house to my self when my mom got home from work early. She opens door and i jump of the bitch. Her dumbass say hi while in doggy position. She doesn;t even cover herself. lol....
That was something...

[WARMachine]

Great stories guys...

Once, i was getting head from the girlfriend when i was staying with my father back in Brazil...

She was doing her thing, but we had the door open, (one thing leads to another after all.) and he walks right in...

She doesnt even know, (obviously, her head is down ) and my old man walks in, looks at me, smiles, gives me a thumbs up, and closes the door...

****in funny as shit...

[rhino1]

Great stories guys...

Once, i was getting head from the girlfriend when i was staying with my father back in Brazil...

She was doing her thing, but we had the door open, (one thing leads to another after all.) and he walks right in...

She doesnt even know, (obviously, her head is down ) and my old man walks in, looks at me, smiles, gives me a thumbs up, and closes the door...

****in funny as shit...

classic

[CSAR]

Great stories guys...

Once, i was getting head from the girlfriend when i was staying with my father back in Brazil...

She was doing her thing, but we had the door open, (one thing leads to another after all.) and he walks right in...

She doesnt even know, (obviously, her head is down ) and my old man walks in, looks at me, smiles, gives me a thumbs up, and closes the door...

****in funny as shit...

Your dad is cool!

[CSAR]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

i got a blowjob on a bus on the way to a concert i was going to see. girl had her head under a blanket and i was rolling with it. i looked over and across on the other side of the bus this greasy looking 40 something year old was locked on me.

my dink sank like the titanic, it was awful

[Schmidty]

My mom has walked in on me atleast 10times w quite a few dif girls back in high school. one time she yelled at me while i was pulln my pants up and she calls me a whore and god doesnt approve n then tells the chick that her house isnt a brothel LMFAO a brothel. She even me one of my x gfs by walking in my room to find me hitting my x from behind LOL

[Schmidty]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

[Chode Logan]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

Hahah classic.

[Older lifter]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

WELL DONE,,, I see J-land has not taken away your sence of humor....lmfao

[gst528i]

My mom has walked in on me atleast 10times w quite a few dif girls back in high school. one time she yelled at me while i was pulln my pants up and she calls me a whore and god doesnt approve n then tells the chick that her house isnt a brothel LMFAO a brothel. She even me one of my x gfs by walking in my room to find me hitting my x from behind LOL

HOLLY FKIN SHYT. YOU AND I HAVE THE SAME MOM....LOL

I BROUGHT THIS GIRL HOME BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL. BEAUTIFUL GURL I WAS TRYING TO GET WITH FOR WEEKS.
I GET HER HOME, AND AS IM WALKING UP THE STAIRS MUM COMES OUT OF HER ROOM AND YELLS AT ME.
SHE LIKE DAYM IT THIS IS NOT A WHORE HOUSE. HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR THIS HOUSE.

then she goes back to her room. Anyway the girl asks " so how many girls do youbring home?

lol

[Odpierdol_sie!]

When i was 13 i was pulling myself around my bedroom and tensed to blast out a fart and shat myself.

[FREAK]

i walked in on my wife a few weeks ago i was out doing yard work i come quietly walk in my bedroom and bagged her with the old silver bullet in her pants

[FREAK]

so then i pulled out my **** and blasted one on her

[Kale]

I saw my son when I was walking past his bedroom when he was 14 rubbing one out watching some porn on his PC. He was spanking it at about 160 strokes a second. I felt like walking in there and saying "Dude you need to savor that shit" !!!!!

[smokeyd]

I saw my son when I was walking past his bedroom when he was 14 rubbing one out watching some porn on his PC. He was spanking it at about 160 strokes a second. I felt like walking in there and saying "Dude you need to savor that shit" !!!!!

hahahaha thats great

[Dukkit]

of all the crazy sexual experiences ive partook in. i have never been caught off guard, surprised, interrupted or anything.

hmm. kinda boring.

[calgarian]

of all the crazy sexual experiences ive partook in. i have never been caught off guard, surprised, interrupted or anything.

hmm. kinda boring.

didnt ur GF almost caught u in the shower with another women when she stopped by during lunch time?

[Dukkit]

didnt ur GF almost caught u in the shower with another women when she stopped by during lunch time?

yea. but that was almost.. i didnt get caught. lol.

so it doesnt count. plus i wasnt worried. even if she did catch me. i would of charmed my way out of it.

i always do

[calgarian]

yea. but that was almost.. i didnt get caught. lol.

so it doesnt count. plus i wasnt worried. even if she did catch me. i would of charmed my way out of it.

i always do

Hmmm wnder where u got this one. I dont have that quality and I am sure ur mother doesnt either.....

[xavier_888888]

hahaha I just remembered my buddy's story . He was yanking it then mom opens the door. quietly he said "well....... at least i'm not using drugs." mom closes the door. LMAO!!

[Dukkit]

my one ex and i were on a walking path along the river in harrisburg, PA. we were in the grass behind a park bench. it was 1 in the morning. we were fukkin and as we were doin so, some homeless guy on a bicycle rode by. stopped. got off and sat on the bench as we were behind it. he heard us. turned around.. saw us and just stared.. i started crackin up laughing and kept going. i asked if he could go down the street to the next bench. he was all like.. uh uh uh uh yea. sorry. LOL
but that was not embarrassing. i thought it was hilarious.

thats the closest ive come to anything like that.

[Kratos]

My roommate in boarding school would put his mattress on the floor and I slept on the top bunk. Thought he was sleeping, didn't think he could see me either. I guess the fire alarm has a little led on it that casts a little light. I was being quiet. He said "Roommate! stop masturbating."

No alone time in the room in boarding school, it was a horrible enviroment for wacking. People got caught all the time. This one kid's door, you could push it real hard and it would open even when locked. He liked to wack str8 into the trash can. He got caught like 5 or more times.

[Amorphic]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

[xavier_888888]

Once I was on a bus going to a concert. There was a young guy and his girlfriend sitting across from me. I was hungover and hadn't shaved or showered for days. The girl complained about being cold or something and her boyfriend got out a blanket to keep her warm. Pretty soon, she gets under the blanket and I couldn't believe my luck. Her head started bobbing up and down like a jackhammer! I tried not to watch, but it was like a live porno!! You can't tell me you wouldn't watch! Anyhow, I started rubbing one out when the kid's eyes locked on mine. His dick sank like the Titanic, but I was stiffer than a cadaver. I blew my load all over the bus window. IT WAS SPOOGETASTIC!!!!

You need help bro! LMAO

[lcstriker07]

Awesome thread! When I was younger me and my girl were in the back of her father's benz and she wouldn't swallow at the time so I blew a huge one in her dad's freshly dry cleaned blazer. No idea what happened but I think about it everytime I see a business man in a mercedes.