One liners

**K.Shinedling** · 07-12-2012, 09:10 PM

I say we all share some funny one liner jokes. Short, simple, and hilarious.

On a scale of Penn State and Casey Anthony, how much do you love children?

**Igifuno** · 07-13-2012, 07:09 PM

I haven't slept for 24 hours, cause that would be too long.

**jpowell** · 07-14-2012, 06:47 PM

Your breath smells like my ass..,?!!

Sent from my iPhone using Forum

**Igifuno** · 07-14-2012, 07:56 PM

Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?

**calgarian** · 07-14-2012, 08:59 PM

do u like cheese with your whine??

**Times Roman** · 07-14-2012, 09:05 PM

are you a fukken dumb shiit or is that just stupid wiped all over your face

**Stigmata101** · 07-14-2012, 09:26 PM

Originally Posted by calgarian

do u like cheese with your whine??

Or vagine.

**Igifuno** · 07-14-2012, 09:42 PM

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 09:49 PM

If a man loses a testicle does that make him half nutz?

**Igifuno** · 07-14-2012, 09:51 PM

I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait."

**K.Shinedling** · 07-14-2012, 10:32 PM

Originally Posted by shol'va

if a man loses a testicle does that make him half nutz?

lol!!!

**K.Shinedling** · 07-14-2012, 10:33 PM

I wonder if Buzz and Woody have ever met Andy's moms toys...

...I'm pretty sure they have the same name.

**Stigmata101** · 07-14-2012, 10:40 PM

No honey its not what you think, I was just rubbing this lotion on my inner thighs because they are so muscular and sometimes they rub together and get chaffed and then some of the lotion gets all spread around and then I get a theraputical erection and the lotion gets everywhere and well I know what this must look like but........,

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 10:44 PM

A man loses his leg in an accident and takes the other guy to court but the judge throws it out saying he didn't have a leg to stand on...

**Stigmata101** · 07-14-2012, 10:46 PM

Originally Posted by Shol'va

A man loses his leg in an accident and takes the other guy to court but the judge throws it out saying he didn't have a leg to stand on...

Hmmmm somethings afoot.

**lovbyts** · 07-14-2012, 10:51 PM

Just because you are paranoid does not mean they are not out to get you.

**Stigmata101** · 07-14-2012, 10:51 PM

Originally Posted by Shol'va

A man loses his leg in an accident and takes the other guy to court but the judge throws it out saying he didn't have a leg to stand on...

I find this Humerus

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 10:54 PM

If the removal of the appendix is called appendectomy, and the removal of the tonsils called a tonsilectomy, What is the removal of hair from the head called?
A haircut

**Hoggage_54** · 07-14-2012, 10:56 PM

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 10:57 PM

What is fear? When your 100% straight and you find out you have to share a bed with 2 guys named Neil and Bob....

**lovbyts** · 07-14-2012, 11:12 PM

Originally Posted by Shol'va

If the removal of the appendix is called appendectomy, and the removal of the tonsils called a tonsilectomy, What is the removal of hair from the head called?
A haircut

Because ectomy means cutting OUT and you get your hair cut OFF. Organs are internal so they need to come out/ectomy and hair is external so it come off.

**gixxerboy1** · 07-14-2012, 11:18 PM

what happens in vegas stays in vegas, except the herpes

**K.Shinedling** · 07-14-2012, 11:20 PM

Originally Posted by lovbyts

Because ectomy means cutting OUT and you get your hair cut OFF. Organs are internal so they need to come out/ectomy and hair is external so it come off.

Ok mr technical hahaha.

**K.Shinedling** · 07-14-2012, 11:21 PM

Originally Posted by gixxerboy1

what happens in vegas stays in vegas, except the herpes

That shit comes back

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:31 PM

Why don't senators use bookmarks.....Because they just bend over the pages.....

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:35 PM

What do you call a cow whose had an abortion? Decaffeinated

**kalspic** · 07-14-2012, 11:35 PM

one a scale of north korea to america how free are you tonight?

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:36 PM

What's the last thing that goes through a bugs mind before hitting the windshield at 80 MPH? It's a-hole.

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:39 PM

Why did the rooster cross the basketball court? He heard the ref was blowing fouls....

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:42 PM

Why was there a time-out called in the leper colony game? There was a face-off in the corner...

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:43 PM

And last...

How can you tell when the poker game between lepers is over? Someone threw his hand in...

**Shol'va** · 07-14-2012, 11:44 PM

Whoops one more

Whats grey and comes in quarts? Elephants

**lovbyts** · 07-15-2012, 12:18 AM

Originally Posted by kalspic

one a scale of north korea to america how free are you tonight?

That's not nearly as relevant as it was 50 years ago. There may be better choices now days.

**kalspic** · 07-15-2012, 01:12 AM

i lack creativity and wit sorry

**jpowell** · 07-15-2012, 01:22 AM

i just tole a chick at the bar.....
"im tryna start a depository (of my nut) in your stomach?!"
she laughed, i laughed.

But she did gimme sum head and swallowed lol.

**K.Shinedling** · 07-15-2012, 01:46 AM

Originally Posted by jpowell

i just tole a chick at the bar.....
"im tryna start a depository (of my nut) in your stomach?!"
she laughed, i laughed.

But she did gimme sum head and swallowed lol.

Niceeee

**Gaspari1255** · 07-15-2012, 05:39 PM

Originally Posted by K.Shinedling

I say we all share some funny one liner jokes. Short, simple, and hilarious.

On a scale of Penn State and Casey Anthony, how much do you love children?

When an older woman sleeps with a younger boy, she's called a cougar. What do you call an older man who sleeps with a younger boy? Nittany Lion!