Today is the worst day of my life... for now

[gbrice75]

Im sorry for your pain gbrice. I had to go see someone in an old people home today and even though it was a good visit I think I know a little of what you are feeling and empathize / sympathize.

Thanks C-doc (I just gave you that name, like it!?)... and i'll try not to start any other threads about dogs.

About two months ago, had to put down one of our cats. He was quite old but in the last 6 months he went downhill fast. Become quiet, slow on his feet, started soiling everywhere....it was not the same cat we'd known for 14 years. We realised he was obviously in a lot of discomfort and he was losing his dignity somewhat. when he went down to vet it turned out he had all sorts of growths on his internal organs so we did the best thing for him.

It's a terrible thing losing a pet, especially when they've been with you a long time. It sucked because a couple weeks later, another one of ours died. The thing is, she'd been sick, but pepped up, started going out more when one day we couldn't find her at all. We searched high and low, and finally we found out where she'd been going outside a lot....not far from us are communal glass houses and she must have gone to them for the warmth and comfort they provide. It looked like she'd had a heart attack (she was also quite old). I hate the fact she was alone when she died, but i'm also comforted that at least she was somewhere she enjoyed going to.

That's the best and worst things about pets....people are practically immortal next to them. We'll always outlive them.

Sorry for your losses as well bro. Funny you mention the bold - because our other dog is right around the same age as our 'sick' dog, and he's not doing great either. He's better than her, but it won't be long for him. I have a feeling he'll be done before the summer. In a few months, we'll have gone from 2 dogs to zero. What a mindfvck. If nothing else, he'll probably die of a broken heart once his girl is gone. She was always the pack leader between the 2. He'll be lost without her - but then again, since she's been 'gone' for nearly a year now, maybe he's already used to it and she's really only there in body - idk.

[ElectraMaddox]

I think you did the right thing. I know it hurts but you def acted in her best interest. That's important. I feel bad for what you're going through and I'm sorry for your loss. I know she'll always be in your heart.

[gbrice75]

I think you did the right thing. I know it hurts but you def acted in her best interest. That's important. I feel bad for what you're going through and I'm sorry for your loss. I know she'll always be in your heart.

Thanks... we still have her now, I don't know what day we're going to do the deed yet but I imagine one day next week unless she gets every worse before then. For now, i'm just going to enjoy the little time we have left with her. <3

[ElectraMaddox]

Thanks... we still have her now, I don't know what day we're going to do the deed yet but I imagine one day next week unless she gets every worse before then. For now, i'm just going to enjoy the little time we have left with her. <3

Awe, you def should! Maybe something special that you an remember with her or something she likes like a toy or treat.

[cherrydrpepper]

Thanks C-doc (I just gave you that name, like it!?)... and i'll try not to start any other threads about dogs.

Hahaha we're cool bro I figured out the other dog thread was RWY.

[twitz]

I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. Stay strong and enjoy your time as much as you can.

[Synergy1]

This situation sucks-----It wont be easy. Good luck

[Rwy]

Very emotional post GB, had my eyes getting a bit watery. It's the hardest thing to do, but you're doing what's best for her. Stay strong big guy.

Me too.

Be strong GB and you are in my thoughts. It sounds like she is struggling and I think you are making the right choice for her. You dont want these memories you want the good ones.

I called my parents vet and he is calling my mom as he thought she was in denial last time he saw my moms dog. I am going to call my mom tomorrow to and try and have a talk with her. Not going to be good.

[gbrice75]

I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. Stay strong and enjoy your time as much as you can.

Thanks Twitz. I really do plan to make every second count. I still haven't been able to wrap my head around the concept that she'll be gone... I suppose until it actually happens, I'm living in a quasi-denial.

This situation sucks-----It wont be easy. Good luck

Thx bud, appreciate it.

Me too.

Be strong GB and you are in my thoughts. It sounds like she is struggling and I think you are making the right choice for her. You dont want these memories you want the good ones.

I called my parents vet and he is calling my mom as he thought she was in denial last time he saw my moms dog. I am going to call my mom tomorrow to and try and have a talk with her. Not going to be good.

Thanks Rwy... please keep me posted with your situation... I'll be checking your thread for updates as well. Good luck to you brother, I hope you and/or your vet can get through to your mom for the dog's sake.

[thex95]

ah buddy sorry. I love my dogs and I dread that fateful day. Stay strong bro

[Zodiac82]

Thanks for all your support guys, it means a lot to me, really.

Cancer - my wife and I were talking the other night (when we still thought March 1st would be our date) and I had the idea that from now until that day, every single night after putting our son to bed, we turn off the TV and all other distractions, and spend some REAL quality time with her, just loving and comforting her, just 30 mins a night of undivided attention. Obviously we're still going to do this, I just thought I'd have a bit more time and wish we had started sooner.

Re: sleeping next to her - our dogs always slept in the bed with us (probably why I have a bad back, lol). That stopped about a year and a half ago when they were no longer able to get on the bed. They used to just jump up. When that was no longer possible, we bought the pet steps and they used them for a while, but then even that became too tough, so they started sleeping on their beds (still in our room) and it's been that way for about a year or so. I've always wanted to continue sleeping with her/them, but the constant crapping (happens often overnight, she doesn't even know it and we just wake up from the smell) had me concerned - obviously I don't want that in the bed with us. However, given the circumstances, that's a small price to pay, and at the very least, I will have 1 last night with her in the bed the way it always was. Absolutely her last night in existence, but since that'll be such a sad night, i'm thinking one other night before then as well, where we can really try to enjoy her.

I want to walk out of that place knowing that we did everything in our power to comfort her as much as possible. I've been carrying her up and down the stairs and outside in my slippers in the snow for months now, and haven't complained at all. I do it happily. Yea, it sucks in the middle of the night, having to get up out of a full blown deep sleep to have lights on in my face, cleaning dog shit, noise waking up the baby, etc. But again, a few months of that is a worthy trade for the years of love and joy she brought us. I'm just sad that our most recent memories of her will be these bad ones. She has always had my heart, and always will. One of her nicknames (among dozens, literally) is Daddy's Girl. She'll always be my Daddy's Girl.

yeh I would definitely spend these last nights next to her....itll suck to clean up the poop if she does but like u said its a small price to pay to to give her the comfort she deserves....

[MuttonChop]

I teared up a little.

Stupid Tren ...

/blametren

That is quite sad. I love dogs but this is one of the reasons I am afraid to get another one.

[Pale1]

Really sorry Brice

[gbrice75]

ah buddy sorry. I love my dogs and I dread that fateful day. Stay strong bro

Thx Hex.

yeh I would definitely spend these last nights next to her....itll suck to clean up the poop if she does but like u said its a small price to pay to to give her the comfort she deserves....

We had her in bed with us last night for about 30 mins, just petting her, it was really sweet.

I teared up a little.

Stupid Tren ...

/blametren

That is quite sad. I love dogs but this is one of the reasons I am afraid to get another one.

Meh... fear is the worst reason to avoid love IMO. No matter how bad it can be, it's well worth it. Love > all.

Really sorry Brice

Thanks Pale.

[gbrice75]

Just to update - yesterday evening was decent. She was up and about, walking around - wobbly, but relatively good. Basically we're going to take it 1 day at a time, and since our vet is being so flexible in being willing to take us in on the spot if need be, that's what we're gonna do. We're still looking at March 1 as a 'soft deadline', but my wife convinced me that it's an arbitrary date. Like, why not tomorrow, or Monday, or Wednesday... all else being equal? Unless she worsens, what exactly is March 1.

Idk guys, I know we have to do it, I'm torn and going back and forth. It's a matter of time, maybe a week, maybe 2 - not long in any case. But watching her up and about last night proves to me it doesn't have to be done TODAY.

[Capebuffalo]

GB it really sucks. But we have to make the decisions they can't. I had a chocolate lab. Got him at 8 weeks old. He went to college with me. We went everywhere together. I taught him to do a double blind retrieve in the field. Loved that dog. He got to be 16 yrs old. He lost control of being able to go to the bathroom. He panted and stood and just looked like he was miserable. But I was selfish and just kept him for me. Finally we think he had a stroke and I had to have him euthanized. He was with me over half of my life at that time. It was hard but the right thing to do. Looking back I should have been strong enough to have done it earlier so he wasn't suffering but I wasn't. My point is it is decision that has to be made. I feel for you. We all know the pain.
Cape

[Lunk1]

Just to update - yesterday evening was decent. She was up and about, walking around - wobbly, but relatively good. Basically we're going to take it 1 day at a time, and since our vet is being so flexible in being willing to take us in on the spot if need be, that's what we're gonna do. We're still looking at March 1 as a 'soft deadline', but my wife convinced me that it's an arbitrary date. Like, why not tomorrow, or Monday, or Wednesday... all else being equal? Unless she worsens, what exactly is March 1.

Idk guys, I know we have to do it, I'm torn and going back and forth. It's a matter of time, maybe a week, maybe 2 - not long in any case. But watching her up and about last night proves to me it doesn't have to be done TODAY.

GB it really sucks. But we have to make the decisions they can't. I had a chocolate lab. Got him at 8 weeks old. He went to college with me. We went everywhere together. I taught him to do a double blind retrieve in the field. Loved that dog. He got to be 16 yrs old. He lost control of being able to go to the bathroom. He panted and stood and just looked like he was miserable. But I was selfish and just kept him for me. Finally we think he had a stroke and I had to have him euthanized. He was with me over half of my life at that time. It was hard but the right thing to do. Looking back I should have been strong enough to have done it earlier so he wasn't suffering but I wasn't. My point is it is decision that has to be made. I feel for you. We all know the pain.
Cape

I agree with Cape...if there is 0% chance of recovery then delay of the inevitable is for you...NOT them! I told you our story but like Paul Harvey there is "the rest of the story"! Because we wated so long it came down to an emergency midnight call to the vet. It was very cold out and he had forgotten his keys to the clinic. He tried to do it on the tailgaite of my tuck. The veins would roll and colapse and he didnt have the right equipment in his truck. I held her as he poked over and over and blood was everywhere! It was all I could do to knoy euthanize him in the parking lot!

He fianlly figured out that he could get in the building another way...my wife and daughter had to see all of this! It was less than pleasant! My point is...like you..I knew what had to happen but milked it out a bit to long! Not for her...but for me! I wish I would have been stronger and more humane!

I also know that it sucks because YOU are the ONE making the decision...my wife and daughter were not going to call it! It was on me! I know it would feel easier if the vet or somebody else said it has to be now or tomorrow or whatever...but they won't! It lies soley on your shoulders and that sucks!

You need only ask ONE question! Does she have the quality of life SHE deserves!? If the answer is no...then the time is now!

[songdog]

Sorry for your loss bro.I know how you feel.

[gbrice75]

GB it really sucks. But we have to make the decisions they can't. I had a chocolate lab. Got him at 8 weeks old. He went to college with me. We went everywhere together. I taught him to do a double blind retrieve in the field. Loved that dog. He got to be 16 yrs old. He lost control of being able to go to the bathroom. He panted and stood and just looked like he was miserable. But I was selfish and just kept him for me. Finally we think he had a stroke and I had to have him euthanized. He was with me over half of my life at that time. It was hard but the right thing to do. Looking back I should have been strong enough to have done it earlier so he wasn't suffering but I wasn't. My point is it is decision that has to be made. I feel for you. We all know the pain.
Cape

Thanks Cape. I do know what needs to be done, then every time i'm right at the point of making the call, I see a little spring back in her step. Mind you, I know it's just a temporary thing, she's not going to get better, it's old age, plain and simple. But seeing that... just makes it harder... it's like... an omen (sorry to sound ghey) that she isn't ready yet.

I agree with Cape...if there is 0% chance of recovery then delay of the inevitable is for you...NOT them! I told you our story but like Paul Harvey there is "the rest of the story"! Because we wated so long it came down to an emergency midnight call to the vet. It was very cold out and he had forgotten his keys to the clinic. He tried to do it on the tailgaite of my tuck. The veins would roll and colapse and he didnt have the right equipment in his truck. I held her as he poked over and over and blood was everywhere! It was all I could do to knoy euthanize him in the parking lot!

He fianlly figured out that he could get in the building another way...my wife and daughter had to see all of this! It was less than pleasant! My point is...like you..I knew what had to happen but milked it out a bit to long! Not for her...but for me! I wish I would have been stronger and more humane!

I also know that it sucks because YOU are the ONE making the decision...my wife and daughter were not going to call it! It was on me! I know it would feel easier if the vet or somebody else said it has to be now or tomorrow or whatever...but they won't! It lies soley on your shoulders and that sucks!

You need only ask ONE question! Does she have the quality of life SHE deserves!? If the answer is no...then the time is now!

Wow Lunk, that's a sad story bro. What a way to go out... that would have killed me.

There is 0% chance of recovery, and I know she's not living a good quality life now. Trust me, I realize that keeping her around any longer is for me/us and not her. I'm under no delusion that i'm doing her any favor... but at the same time, I ask myself - what's the difference if I do it tomorrow, or a week from tomorrow - assuming her condition stays exactly the same? Why then CAN'T I have her for another week, for me? As far as we (and the vet) can tell, she's not in pain, so are we being that selfish? I mean, selfish, yes - but not the the extent that it's causing her to suffer. At least we don't think. Is there really harm in that?

On the other hand, if she winds up having a seizure or some other violet reaction, i'll never forgive myself as that could have been avoided by putting her down while she was still in relative peace. Ugh... this all fcking sucks major d!ck.

[gbrice75]

Sorry for your loss bro.I know how you feel.

Thanks SD, appreciate it buddy.

[Times Roman]

I had to put down my daughters cat before. It was really a great cat. I was holding the cat in my hands on the table, the vet put the needle in, then the cat looked at me, gave a little purr, closed it's eyes, exhaled, and was gone.

[gbrice75]

I had to put down my daughters cat before. It was really a great cat. I was holding the cat in my hands on the table, the vet put the needle in, then the cat looked at me, gave a little purr, closed it's eyes, exhaled, and was gone.

Ugh... are you supporting me here TR... or trying to get me to jump out a window? lol

[Lunk1]

Thanks Cape. I do know what needs to be done, then every time i'm right at the point of making the call, I see a little spring back in her step. Mind you, I know it's just a temporary thing, she's not going to get better, it's old age, plain and simple. But seeing that... just makes it harder... it's like... an omen (sorry to sound ghey) that she isn't ready yet.



Wow Lunk, that's a sad story bro. What a way to go out... that would have killed me.

There is 0% chance of recovery, and I know she's not living a good quality life now. Trust me, I realize that keeping her around any longer is for me/us and not her. I'm under no delusion that i'm doing her any favor... but at the same time, I ask myself - what's the difference if I do it tomorrow, or a week from tomorrow - assuming her condition stays exactly the same? Why then CAN'T I have her for another week, for me? As far as we (and the vet) can tell, she's not in pain, so are we being that selfish? I mean, selfish, yes - but not the the extent that it's causing her to suffer. At least we don't think. Is there really harm in that?

On the other hand, if she winds up having a seizure or some other violet reaction, i'll never forgive myself as that could have been avoided by putting her down while she was still in relative peace. Ugh... this all fcking sucks major d!ck.

know exactly what your going through buddy! You hit the nail on the head...you really are just being selfish. I mean no disrespect, I simply am offering experience. The last 2 I had to put to sleep have both been a situation where I hung on too long and both ended in less than optimum conditions with late night emergency vet calls! I know how they go from bad days to good (or seemingly better) but some of that is in our minds as well. If you were brain dead but your organs allowed you to be healthy and go on living...would you WANT to? I realize this is an extreme example but the bottom line is...if she can't function as a happy, energetic, playful dog...then she deserves the respect to be let go!

I am not sying today...but it sounds like you need to make a hard date not a soft date! It is time my friend!!!!

[gbrice75]

know exactly what your going through buddy! You hit the nail on the head...you really are just being selfish. I mean no disrespect, I simply am offering experience. The last 2 I had to put to sleep have both been a situation where I hung on too long and both ended in less than optimum conditions with late night emergency vet calls! I know how they go from bad days to good (or seemingly better) but some of that is in our minds as well. If you were brain dead but your organs allowed you to be healthy and go on living...would you WANT to? I realize this is an extreme example but the bottom line is...if she can't function as a happy, energetic, playful dog...then she deserves the respect to be let go!

I am not sying today...but it sounds like you need to make a hard date not a soft date! It is time my friend!!!!

Thanks for your straightforward advice my friend... and it's good advice, not taken as disrespectful at all. I know you're trying to help, and speaking from experience. You're right in that I do NOT want to deal with a last minute situation, let alone in the middle of the night. To be honest, I was ready to set a hard date (March 1) last night, and my wife talked me out of it. I know she's just having a terrible time coping with all of this, but we do have to think of our girl. 2 options:

1) planned date - allows us to: secure a babysitter. Mentally prepare. Say goodbye, knowing it's our last. schedule time off of work

2) unplanned/last minute situation - will be reactionary, likely due to worsening conditions (i.e. dog in pain or worse). No babysitter. No scheduled time off, and I HATE calling out of work. No mental preparation (we wanted to have her sleep with us that last night for sure). No real time to say goodbye (we're already doing that obviously, but the hard date allows us to say that last goodbye). What it get's us is more time with her, that's the only upside.

[Back In Black]

I had to put down my daughters cat before. It was really a great cat. I was holding the cat in my hands on the table, the vet put the needle in, then the cat looked at me, gave a little purr, closed it's eyes, exhaled, and was gone.

That's what I did with my dog. You just made me a little tearful TR, but then I smiled some happy memories.

[Lunk1]

Thanks for your straightforward advice my friend... and it's good advice, not taken as disrespectful at all. I know you're trying to help, and speaking from experience. You're right in that I do NOT want to deal with a last minute situation, let alone in the middle of the night. To be honest, I was ready to set a hard date (March 1) last night, and my wife talked me out of it. I know she's just having a terrible time coping with all of this, but we do have to think of our girl. 2 options:

1) planned date - allows us to: secure a babysitter. Mentally prepare. Say goodbye, knowing it's our last. schedule time off of work

2) unplanned/last minute situation - will be reactionary, likely due to worsening conditions (i.e. dog in pain or worse). No babysitter. No scheduled time off, and I HATE calling out of work. No mental preparation (we wanted to have her sleep with us that last night for sure). No real time to say goodbye (we're already doing that obviously, but the hard date allows us to say that last goodbye). What it get's us is more time with her, that's the only upside.

The hard date sounds like a great choice if conditions are staying normal! Everyone knows what the plan is and can prepare for it...it will make it better than having an unplanned traumatic event! Best of luck and holla if you need ANYTHING!

[marcus300]

Sorry mate

[gbrice75]

The hard date sounds like a great choice if conditions are staying normal! Everyone knows what the plan is and can prepare for it...it will make it better than having an unplanned traumatic event! Best of luck and holla if you need ANYTHING!

Thanks for all your ongoing support buddy, much appreciated!

Sorry mate

Appreciate it big fella.

[Rwy]

my mom told me to"mind your business I am sick of hearing about the dog and you brother"

so I did what i could

[gbrice75]

my mom told me to"mind your business I am sick of hearing about the dog and you brother"

so I did what i could

Wow, really? Did the vet call her like he/she said they would?

[Rwy]

I am not sure. I told her that I spoke with him and told her he said she (dog) was in bad shape last time he saw her and she called him a liar. So I see how bad the denial is

So I did what I could and the dog is going to suffer for a bit. Pretty selfish of the two of them but as I get older (love my parents very much) I realize my parents make some poor decisions.

[austinite]

Wow. So sorry to hear this GB. Hang in there buddy, I know it's not easy

[Twin]

My condolences. Just the thought of my 5 year old american pit bull terrier dieing makes me tear a little. I love him so much. So i cant imagine how you feel right now. But my true condolences...

[gbrice75]

I am not sure. I told her that I spoke with him and told her he said she (dog) was in bad shape last time he saw her and she called him a liar. So I see how bad the denial is

So I did what I could and the dog is going to suffer for a bit. Pretty selfish of the two of them but as I get older (love my parents very much) I realize my parents make some poor decisions.

Good luck with it buddy, really.

Wow. So sorry to hear this GB. Hang in there buddy, I know it's not easy

Thx for your support Austin.

My condolences. Just the thought of my 5 year old american pit bull terrier dieing makes me tear a little. I love him so much. So i cant imagine how you feel right now. But my true condolences...

Thanks buddy. It's a disgusting feeling... but I have no choice other than to move on and be satisfied with keeping her in my thoughts and honor her by keeping her spirit alive.

[gbrice75]

Btw, we're doing it tomorrow. I don't know what time yet, but it'll be tomorrow. So much for making it to March 1. She's gotten worse over the past 2 days... really can't walk at all. When she CAN hold her own weight, she's extremely wobbly (worse than previously) and it's just bad. Time to put an end to this before it gets even worse, whatever that may be.

[GirlyGymRat]

Btw, we're doing it tomorrow. I don't know what time yet, but it'll be tomorrow. So much for making it to March 1. She's gotten worse over the past 2 days... really can't walk at all. When she CAN hold her own weight, she's extremely wobbly (worse than previously) and it's just bad. Time to put an end to this before it gets even worse, whatever that may be.

I am so sorry. I'll say a prayer for your family.

[t-dogg]

****.... this is sad, very sorry to hear.

[AdrenalineJunkie]

Sorry to hear this gbrice. Losing a pet is always hard, but so is watching them suffer. Youre doing the right thing. Best wishes to you and your family.

[gbrice75]

Thank you all so much for your warmth and support. We have one last night with her, and I'm sure as hell gonna make it count. We're gonna have her sleep with us tonight... she might piss or shit our bed, but that can be cleaned. We'll never see her again, and I don't want to be kicking myself for not taking this last opportunity to cuddle with her.

[kitstreasure]

GBrice, man, I've been where you are, it's HARD. But our animals make us better people, both for loving them, and for ourselves. I was ready to tell you about my Odie, but that just cheapens what you're going through. Our pets may not be humans, but they are some of the most loving, supportive, caring, understanding, patient people in our lives. No matter how big an asshole we're being; no matter how badly we've hurt others in our lives, our pets always love, accept and forgive us. This is a horrible place to be, but it is definitely time to let her go. No amount of rationalizing it is going to make it hurt less, unfortunately. But knowing that it's the right thing does make it easier to go through with it. It's okay to hurt, it's okay to be upset. Thankfully, people understand us not being at our best right after the loss of a pet. Take some time for yourself afterwards to do just as you said, and mourn and grieve her loss. The love felt for a pet, is second to none, because they love us in ways another human never can. She knows you love her, and to be honest, you're probably why she's hanging on.