Thread: Whats the divorce rate up to???
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02-09-2004, 06:30 PM #1
Whats the divorce rate up to???
I hear its higher then 60%!!!! Can you believe our generation!!!! Does anyone plan on getting married in here, or is married, and do you think about that? That sounds like a silly question but If you can picture it 60%, that's 10 couples you know 6 of which will end up divorcing eachother?? LOLLLL My parents were the first in my neighborhood to get divorced.. It wasn't shocking or anything, my dad was having an affair while my mother was raising us, I've grown to accept it.. The more i think about it, the more it bothers me.. Does this bother anyone else, the divorce rate being so high? whats the point of getting married?
How do you guys feel about this sh!t.. It's a big deal, if you plan on tieing the knot one day.. Females you respond too, and people that are married, so we get crossfire here.. Is love that blind? There is no right answer, but what makes people want leave eachother so much lately..
absolutely ridiculous subject!!!!!!!!!!!!
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02-09-2004, 06:37 PM #2
my theory
Here's my take on the marriage rate.
It has to be 50% and no more. Do you know why ? Becasue half the marriages end in divorce and the other half end in death.
TheInfamousApe
TheGorilla
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02-09-2004, 06:37 PM #3
I'm not sure the current or last generation knows how to stay in a long term relationship.. it has become too common place... and acceptable..
My parents, and grandparents.........all divorced......
What do ya know..............The answer to your every question
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02-09-2004, 06:41 PM #4
Haha... I wish it that was the truth, It may be conflicting information, but I heard its higher then 60%, that end up divorcing... Thats fuking sick!!! Whats the point of spending 40 grand on a wedding, when your going to pay that to lawyers to settle the divorce, then ultimately lose half of what you have in 3 years or so?...
LOLLLLLLLL
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02-09-2004, 06:45 PM #5ttuPrincess Guest
I think the divorce rate being so high is due to the fact that people are getting married at such a young age and not really looking at what might happen down the road. In a world like the one we live in today many people marry to get out of situations they are in thinking that marriage is going to make their life so much better, only to realize a few years later that its not better, but infact worse.
I plan on getting married.... and I hope its to the one I am with now, but I don't forsee it anytime in the near near future. I want to live with this person before hand for atleast a year, if not more, and also I would like a long engagement, not because I want the chance to back out, but because I want to be sure that he is "THE ONE."
A lot of people dont do this, Im not saying that my way is the "Right Way." Some people get married after knowing someone for a few months and it does end up working out. They take a chance and they are very lucky, but many are not.
Another thing is that many young couples see divorce as a way out of a problem with their significant other, when the problem really could be worked out....if they would just stay and talk out the problem there might not be a need for divorce.
People also need to think about marriage when they have children.... My parents tried to get remarried after I was born and all I remember is them fighting.. that is no way for a child to be brought up... DO NOT get married because you have a child....stay friends and raise the child with 2 loving parents, not parents who tried to be married and hate each other in the end.
In answer to your last question... Yes, love is blind, but marriage is not... it should be faced with open eyes, open hearts and most importantly, open minds!!!
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02-09-2004, 06:52 PM #6
wait wait
Once your married your married.
a marriage ends in 1 of 2 ways :
1.divorce
2.death
THERFORE, 50% of all marriages in in divorce.
TG
Originally Posted by monster.
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02-09-2004, 06:56 PM #7
You have a few good points ttuPrincess.. I agree with spywizard too, some people i see are too imature to get married, and would not be capable of having a long term relationship.. I think, It ultimately depends on the both people having/wanting the same things in their future.. Times change, everyone has different goals, make a million, start their own company; i could see how selfishness could play a part too..
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02-09-2004, 06:57 PM #8Originally Posted by thegorilla
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02-09-2004, 06:57 PM #9ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by thegorilla
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02-09-2004, 07:01 PM #10Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
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02-09-2004, 07:02 PM #11ttuPrincess Guest
If your selfish enough not to support the one you said "till death do us part" to when they want to better themself by IE. making more money, getting in shape, or any other way that does not effect you in a harmful way, then I feel you deserve to be alone for the rest of your life, or with somene who does not care about your feelings either..... but that kind of person Im talking about could be my roommate to a "T"
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02-09-2004, 08:25 PM #12
Marriage has different meanings to people now adays. Its too easy to get into and out of a marriage. Me personally: I think it is a good thing. I dont think a judge should make people stay together if they dont want to. Just because they got married does not mean they should stay together. Hell. At one time they loved each other and wanted to spend their lives together. Times change, feelings change and so should the situation.
Many people stay together and many dont. Dont base your outlook on others outcomes. Your life has nothing to do with a RATIO or statistic.
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02-09-2004, 09:07 PM #13Originally Posted by thegorilla
lets take 10 of them for example what if 7 end in divorce and the other 3 end in death wouldnt it make for 70%? More marriges end in divorce then death..
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02-09-2004, 09:25 PM #14
I have one word for us guys "PRENUP" !!!!!! Then she can't take half
Peace..........
Steaddyyyy........
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02-09-2004, 10:02 PM #15
In California: Prenups mean shiit. Lawyers in California have ways around prenups. Ive heard a lot of stories where the person is still able to take half of what she married into. Weird laws.
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02-09-2004, 10:11 PM #16
I've always viewed myself as the "poster child" for the DON"T GET MARRIED campaign. In about 3 hours, I celebrate my 3rd year of marriage. I have learned two very very large things in the last 10 years...3 of which qualify Iin my marriage.
1) Life is too short. Live for today and live for you.
2) Do what you need to do.
3) Screw everybody else, do what works for you.
I took me almost 10 years to really understand that this is true. #1 is really all that matters...really all that can make you smile, day in and day out. So...
my theory....
LIFE IS TOO SHORT, LIFE TODAY FOR TODAY AND TOMORROW FOR YOU!!!!!
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02-09-2004, 10:18 PM #17ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by Stea7jjdyEddie
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02-09-2004, 10:44 PM #18Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
Revenge. Marter sorta thing. "Ill show him" thinking. He wants to go screw his secretary, well I will destroy his finances and such. Rack up credit card bills etc. Just immature hatred.
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02-09-2004, 10:53 PM #19ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by bermich
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02-09-2004, 10:54 PM #20Originally Posted by bermich
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02-10-2004, 03:18 AM #21
i've enjoyed reading this thread, and as a child that grew up hearing my parents fight i think divorce isnt that bad, but i agree a lot of people are making mistakes with who they choose as their partners, i think society doesnt value marriage as much these days as in previous generations.
But how do you know the person you want to marry will still be the love of your life in 20-30 years?? thats a very hard decision to make, i dont plan on getting married anytime soon and i'm 27
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02-10-2004, 04:57 AM #22Female Member
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Well, my parents are still married...some 38 years I think. And i can remember talk of divorce and arguing, s**t who doesn't....marriage is definitely work...and if you're not willing to work at it then don't get into it. But, remember that life is too short not to be happy! So, if you are married, my thoughts are, if you're not happy do something about it! Because happiness is most important, it reflects the person you are, and the person that you want to be.
dest"Obstacles are things you see when you take your eyes off your goals!"
"I will not back down!"
If you fully believe you will be successful and can visualize yourself being successful, you will succeed. Tom Platz (Mr. Universe)
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02-10-2004, 05:43 AM #23Originally Posted by destinationms.o
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02-10-2004, 06:18 AM #24
I agree completely wiht ttuprincess, people are deffinitly getting married to young. I think that maybe before people get married they should live together to see if they really would like to spend the rest of their lives with this person. I am not sure if that would help to suituation but that's what I would do.
BG
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02-10-2004, 08:44 AM #25
you guys are all hitting great points. I have seen way too many people get married for the wrong reasons, have children for the wrong reasons, etc. Really does piss me off when I get to thinking about it.
I have been married 9.5 years...got married when I was 22 and my wife was 21. I am now 31 and she is 30. We have been together most of our adult lives. Everything we have today we built together. Still no kids, maybe one of these days, but when we do have kids it will be well planned and thought out. Seems like common sense to me, but in today's society there seems to be a lacking of common sense when it comes to marriage and having babies.
We lived together for more than a year before getting married, wouldn't do it any other way. Her parents bitched and moaned about it, but like princess said above, you are crazy if you don't live together first. Like KC said, live your life for yourself, or yourselves in this case. Too many people live life trying to make other people happy and then find out years down the road that they themselves aren't happy.
One thing that really frustrates me about couples when they start living together and/or get married is how they so abruptly change their lives. They quit working out and trying to improve themselves physically. Quit getting dressed up and going out...quit eating healthy. To me, correct me if I am wrong here, but once you are married you should have even more drive to improve your physical appearance for your significant other. You should still be going out and flirting with each other, having dates, partying, etc.
I have seen it a thousand times...a couple seperates and the first thing each of them does is start dieting and working out, getting dressed up nice and going out, etc. I don't get it. Frustrates me. Why weren't they doing that to begin with. Lazy is my guess. Laziness in a marriage will only lead to divorce.
Marriage is the hardest thing you can ever be successful at. It is also the most fantastic thing you can ever be a part of. I believe that in order to have a successful marriage, you have to literally stop thinking in the terms of "I" or "me" and start thinking "us" and "we". Your spouse should become the center of your universe...and vice versa. You can still have a life outside the marriage...but your marriage should always be your first concern. Some people are too self centered to be married.
The other thing that gets me is when a marriage is going through a tough time, couples think that adding a baby to the equation will "fix" everything. WRONG. Having a child puts more strain on a marriage than anything else. Why have a kid when the marriage is already shaky. I don't get that either. Pretty greedy in my opinion. Not taking the child's welfare and well being into the equation. So once again, a kid will grow up in a divorced environment.
Okay...I could go on...but I'll shut up now...
peace,
ttgb
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02-10-2004, 12:43 PM #26
The divorce rate is def. up to 60%+.......esp. around here on Long Island..........i thought it was even higher then that
my parents were divorced when i was 10 years old........i learned to accept it and actually i'd rather have it that way........when 2 people cant get along...its just not a good envoriment.........personally, i dont see myself getting married anytime before 30......if even
but lately i do see people waiting until they are alot older to get married then they were........everyone just lives together now..........which is better IMOStrength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, THAT IS STRENGTH
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02-10-2004, 01:27 PM #27
Of course the Divorce rate is up.........the ladies now how handsome I am....and they all want a piece of Mass junkie ......Easy ladies...theres enough to go around
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02-10-2004, 01:33 PM #28Originally Posted by mass junkie
peace,
ttgb
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02-10-2004, 04:27 PM #29
tryingtogetbig.......I must say that post is great it hit the nail exactly on the head about everything with marriage.....am glad to see and hear that you and your wife are happy......good luck!!!!
Peace........
Steadyyyy...........
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02-10-2004, 05:34 PM #30ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by tryingtogetbig
You should always constantly be trying to impress the one you love, but most girls and some guys gain what I call "Love Pounds" because they get comfortable when they are with someone.
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02-10-2004, 05:51 PM #31
i got married when i was 26. i thought i was plenty old enough. last year i got divorced after almost 8 years together. we never really got along but its weird being with someone for that long and come to find out you dont even really know them. she ended up marrying the guy she was f*cking around on me with 2 1/2 months after we got divorced i see now that at 32 im STILL not ready to be married. sure, i would LOVE to have a great woman in my life but theres alot of sh*t i want to do for myself now. like build another turbo mustang and go to school. the thought has crossed my mind that im pretty incompatible with about 98% of the women out there and then im super picky about the other 2% so id say im screwed im not sure if ill ever get married again but im still open to the idea.
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02-10-2004, 07:39 PM #32Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
peace,
ttgb
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02-11-2004, 07:36 AM #33
It's around 55-60%. I have one in the books.
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02-11-2004, 07:59 AM #34
I am going to put forth the idea.... that women see how thier mothers were treated, and alot of these issues get handed down from generation to generation..
on the other hand... alot of women see thier mom is abused (physically or mentally) and they rebel..saying.."i will never let anyone treat me like that" and then thier children learn new ways of dealing with people.
Men are worse.... They are coddled by thier mom's because thier fathers don't know how to relate, or treat them because they were taught by thier fathers (depression era).. the mom's over compensate because here is a man (thier son) that loves them no matter what... so they do everything for them... the issue is that same young man has expectations that they have been taught by thier moms...
The problem becomes this young man who has become dependant on a mom to provide for them.... meets today's woman... who is an equal and won't put up with that crap... this is what i have observed with my 2 daughters..
what a mess.........so today.... each of them go into a relationship with different expectations.......................The answer to your every question
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02-11-2004, 08:02 AM #35
When it comes down to the grit. the average man stands nothing to gain by marriage....there are to many hooks out there giving that stuff away to "buy" it..Also she gets the man's name and his good credit to ruin, while she humps whoever when ol boy is out being the bread-winner...like electricity, most chicks follow the path of least resistence..that is why chicks are hookers,cheaters, strippers and wives.
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02-11-2004, 08:26 AM #36
Bama............
relax.....................take some clomid or something................
I can make the same arguments and support them.. but.
it is just inflamitory, and might get some people upset........
and you know what happens when that happens...
Now.. take a big breath.... and eat some protein........
Originally Posted by BamaSlammaThe answer to your every question
Rules
A bigot is a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted
to his or her own opinions and prejudices, especially
one exhibiting intolerance, and animosity toward those of differing beliefs.
If you get scammed by an UGL listed on this board or by another member here, it's all part of the game and learning experience for you,
we do not approve nor support any sources that may be listed on this site.
I will not do source checks for you, the peer review from other members should be enough to help you make a decision on your quest. Buyer beware.
Don't Let the Police kick your ass
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02-11-2004, 09:45 AM #37
I totally thought marriage was for ever. I always said I'd never get a divorce. Look at me now seporated for 2 weeks and ready to file almost.
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02-11-2004, 10:19 AM #38
Since women are no longer dependent on men for a living or identity I don't think it is suprising at all that the divorce rate has gone up. Women no longer have to take physical or mental abuse from men in order to survive. I don't consider that a bad thing. I do think that with television and the internet peoples perception of what their life should be like has become warped. I think the need for instant gratification and the expectation that one should have a fairy tale life without working at it has contributed to the problem. That along with the opportunity to meet and have affairs with numerous amounts of people via the internet, work, or travel has made this inevitable.
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02-11-2004, 11:04 AM #39
Along the lines of what Rickson said, the huge increase in women's earnings during the last 20 years has also contributed to rising divorce rates. More women today are college educated and make a lot more money then they did 20 yrs ago. Women are more independent then in the past and can rely less on men to support themselves and their family. Gone are the days where the traditional family was the man as the "breadwinner" of the household and the wife as the homemaker.
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02-11-2004, 11:15 AM #40
Sorry man...........
There is tomorrow.......... are u using all that emotion to work on those legs???
J/K
Good luck.......
Originally Posted by RONThe answer to your every question
Rules
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If you get scammed by an UGL listed on this board or by another member here, it's all part of the game and learning experience for you,
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