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Thread: Depressed about my Body

  1. #1
    valgar007 is offline New Member
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    Depressed about my Body

    Sup fellaz, just looking for some advice and I'll keep it short and brief.
    Currently:
    40yo
    6'2
    205lbs
    13%BF ? Loose skin
    Diet varies from, Keto, Clean bulk, Dirty to just regular meals.

    Ive been overweight most of my life and at my biggest I was 300lbs, never was active at all.
    Dealt with some depression and body issues and at age 33 became active and lost some weight.
    Dropped to 175lbs by diet and cardio but looked horrible because I didn't have much muscle and has saggy skin.
    Decided to cut the excess cardio and lift weights but my results were minimal and became more depressed and stopped working out.
    Saw a doctor and turns out my test was low and been on TRT for 3 years now 100mg cyp weekly.
    Now with the test my body has changed and did pack on some muscle but nothing outrageous.
    I wanna do a body recomp and pack on some serious muscle and I'm looking to try Tren .

    I'm planning to get surgery next year to get rid of most of the loose skin and I want to be at my optimal shape before I go under the knife.
    I feel like a size L stuck in XXL Skin and I wanna fill in the parts I can like chest, arms and butt.
    I definitely have some underdeveloped muscles that take more strain because of years of not being active.
    Did EQ and Deca last year and it helped for sure but looking for the next level.

    You guys recommend a good cycle for a guy in my situation?
    Feel down, I never take off my shirt and wear compression gear to keep skin in when working out.
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  2. #2
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    We're all depressed about our bodies in some ways, that's why we're on here. I know I am at times, quite often. Can't give you advice on what stack to use, but isn't there a benefit to waiting until you get the surgery to get bigger? Cycles are only temporary, anyway. Unless you do a cycle right before surgery, you'll probably shrink back down eventually if you're just on TRT.
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  3. #3
    valgar007 is offline New Member
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    I feel you. I'm looking it on cost and minimal work and fast recovery. The less the doctor has to do the cheaper it'll be on me. I know cycles don't last but I could be wrong but feel like I keep a good amount of gains because I'm on TRT. I wanna explore different cycles and fill in certain parts in of my body if possible. The deca helped and I kept some of those gains even till now. TRT wont help me get bigger but Ive read that after numerous other cycles from pro bodybuilder that TRT definitely helps keep a good chunk of those gains.

  4. #4
    HoldMyBeer is online now Productive Member
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    Yuuuuuup, been there, I think most of us have
    If I would you I would want to bulk. I do not like tren for bulking, you can get similar results with compounds that have less side effects. Especially insomnia, I hate not being able to sleep, it fucks up other aspects of my life, plus it's essential for growth.
    I would use test and deca again, in larger quantities, and add anadrol in the first and last 4 weeks (granted you have at least 4 weeks off in between). You will blow up (in your situation that may be a good thing) and gain a lot of muscle if diet and training is on point.

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  5. #5
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    Would not recommend using Tren in your situation to bulk. Bulking on Tren is quite advanced and requires a lot of experience and being 101% in tune with your body.

    If I was in your shoes I would just add HGH and try to do the surgery a lot sooner. At 40 years old it shouldn't be too hard to find an anti aging clinic to provide rthe GH
    I no longer check my inbox. If you PM me I will not reply.

  6. #6
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    We're all depressed about our bodies in some ways, that's why we're on here. I know I am at times, quite often. Can't give you advice on what stack to use, but isn't there a benefit to waiting until you get the surgery to get bigger? Cycles are only temporary, anyway. Unless you do a cycle right before surgery, you'll probably shrink back down eventually if you're just on TRT.
    I can tell you not everyone is, the day I started loving myself for what I am is the same day I unleashed the beast within. Conquering the mental side is the key to the physical side. I was so depressed in my life and lost everything on top of all the hell I went through then got dealt what at the time seemed like god taking a crap on me. An emergency surgery leaving me with a brutal scar on my stomach and my abs cut apart. It took a long time to recover but the scar turned into motivation and now I’m in the best shape of my life even my stomach looks great even with the scar. I’ve never enjoyed having my shirt off more than now. All I’m trying to say is you need to fix the mental side of things. Everything else will follow.
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  7. #7
    < <Samson> >'s Avatar
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    Others have it way worse -

    One of the best examples of the worst is a lady without arms at my gym - yes, no arms at all, straight from the shoulders on both. . . I know that’s not what that’s meant to do - but, seeing that shit is so encouraging. The rest of her is in super fit shape - how can someone keep mentally stable to get that far - nothing short of amazing imo


    Makes all of my nonsense probs seem so so little

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by redz View Post
    I can tell you not everyone is, the day I started loving myself for what I am is the same day I unleashed the beast within. Conquering the mental side is the key to the physical side. I was so depressed in my life and lost everything on top of all the hell I went through then got dealt what at the time seemed like god taking a crap on me. An emergency surgery leaving me with a brutal scar on my stomach and my abs cut apart. It took a long time to recover but the scar turned into motivation and now I’m in the best shape of my life even my stomach looks great even with the scar. I’ve never enjoyed having my shirt off more than now. All I’m trying to say is you need to fix the mental side of things. Everything else will follow.
    I guess I should have said, some or many instead of "everyone." Sounds like you had quite a traumatizing experience that you were able to come out of a better man. That's encouraging! You posted a pic a couple of months ago and you were looking great, I didn't notice any scar.

    Quote Originally Posted by < <Samson> > View Post
    Others have it way worse -

    One of the best examples of the worst is a lady without arms at my gym - yes, no arms at all, straight from the shoulders on both. . . I know that’s not what that’s meant to do - but, seeing that shit is so encouraging. The rest of her is in super fit shape - how can someone keep mentally stable to get that far - nothing short of amazing imo


    Makes all of my nonsense probs seem so so little
    Wow... that's inspiration right there. In my gym we get people of all ages, from teens to 90 year olds. Some can barely walk and are hunched over terribly, but they still work out.

  9. #9
    < <Samson> >'s Avatar
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    And - to follow another thread on here

    Darn near everything is fixable with surgery < of course finances dictate that more than anything


    But, yeah - the lady at my gym is the 1st that comes to mind, 2nd is another lady with one leg who I seen do squats & last but not least are the two guys around my age post stroke - still pushing it < to see this will power in person is nothing short of inspirational


    Amazing to see as unfortunate that people have to endure such things

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by valgar007 View Post
    Sup fellaz, just looking for some advice and I'll keep it short and brief.
    Currently:
    40yo
    6'2
    205lbs
    13%BF ? Loose skin
    Diet varies from, Keto, Clean bulk, Dirty to just regular meals.

    Ive been overweight most of my life and at my biggest I was 300lbs, never was active at all.
    Dealt with some depression and body issues and at age 33 became active and lost some weight.
    Dropped to 175lbs by diet and cardio but looked horrible because I didn't have much muscle and has saggy skin.
    Decided to cut the excess cardio and lift weights but my results were minimal and became more depressed and stopped working out.
    Saw a doctor and turns out my test was low and been on TRT for 3 years now 100mg cyp weekly.
    Now with the test my body has changed and did pack on some muscle but nothing outrageous.
    I wanna do a body recomp and pack on some serious muscle and I'm looking to try Tren .

    I'm planning to get surgery next year to get rid of most of the loose skin and I want to be at my optimal shape before I go under the knife.
    I feel like a size L stuck in XXL Skin and I wanna fill in the parts I can like chest, arms and butt.
    I definitely have some underdeveloped muscles that take more strain because of years of not being active.
    Did EQ and Deca last year and it helped for sure but looking for the next level.

    You guys recommend a good cycle for a guy in my situation?
    Feel down, I never take off my shirt and wear compression gear to keep skin in when working out.
    I’ll chime in and echo what many others have said. It’s cliche, but beauty does come from within. Love your body regardless, it's the only one you’re given. My Dad would always say “I felt sorry for the man that had no shoes, until I saw the man that had no feet”. Own your body through your mind....
    Now as far as aesthetically enhancing it (which we’re all here to do) I too would suggest forgoing Tren. Side effects are gnarly and you’re in your infancy of experimenting with ASS. Too many other good alternatives at your disposal. The thing with tren for me is it drives my anxiety through the roof and causes some other wacky mental issues for me. If you’re already battling some depression the potential to exacerbate it is real (big correlation between anxiety and depression). The surgery is going to paramount to overcoming what you’re feeling because no amount of androgens is going to makeup for that loose skin. I’m all for exploring removal of the stretched skin because I’ve seen first hand what happens after losing all of that weight and the impact it has on the skin that held that fat. I’d also be remiss if I didn’t give you a giant KUDOS for dropping that weight, changing your lifestyle and owning your fitness, that deserves to be celebrated.
    Since you’re on TRT, you can easily blast on test and still see some great gains in terms of muscle mass and then come back to your cruise dosage and hold those gains. You could run Deca again as well since you had good results earlier. You have the option of running some bulking orals for a short term as well (dbol and others), all good option before trying tren. It really is a wacky compound and like others have said, there are better bulking agents. I’m running low dose now for a cut and it kills my appetite, fucks up my sleep and makes me anxious, almost 4 weeks in and I’m wondering why I even bother. It’s my 3rd time with it and it seems to have gotten tougher to tolerate even though I’ve LOWERED my dose. Take advantage of your motivation and your body’s naivety to other substances and try some better bulking agents that come with less sides. HGH and peptides are another option as mentioned but are expensive and run secondary in my opinion to some other options at your disposal.

    Good luck bro and stay positive and strong!
    Last edited by SampsonandDelilah; 05-25-2019 at 09:01 AM.

  11. #11
    redz's Avatar
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    I guess I should have said, some or many instead of "everyone." Sounds like you had quite a traumatizing experience that you were able to come out of a better man. That's encouraging! You posted a pic a couple of months ago and you were looking great, I didn't notice any scar.
    Right after 50 or 60 staples removed....
    Depressed about my Body-5aad86ce-9e88-4e53-bdda-2e043c21a88a.jpg
    Then the comeback
    Depressed about my Body-af0cc16d-174f-43d6-b7df-92983e685fd8.jpg

    The scar is still there but I made it irrelevant. Now I continue to be the best me ever. What’s to come over the next few months will be incredible I’m ready to achieve my dream physique.

  12. #12
    valgar007 is offline New Member
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    Thank you for the replies guys its appreciated. I know I got some demons to work on and the surgery would help. It sucks sometimes knowing no matter how much I workout there's things I cant change. People have told me take the loose skin as a badge of honor, but yet again I want to see and the world to see the fruits of my labor. I have a lot to work on, but truly want to feel comfortable in my own skin one day. I might go up on Deca because my last cycle was: Deca 300mg Test 500mg and EQ 600mg weekly. Would love HGH but stuff is expensive AF and I cant afford it. Did Dbol a long time ago and hated the bloat I looked swollen and didn't keep any of those gains. I'll probably see a shrink some day and work on some issues I have personally.

    I'd like to hear more opinions on cycles though you'd recommend for a guy like me. Sarms , peptides and other gear. I'm really looking to try something else besides Deca but i'm leaning towards it again.
    The picture is of me after Deca and cutting doing keto. I got nice results but under the towel is a mess of skin lol
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Depressed about my Body-20190525_141645.jpg  

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by valgar007 View Post
    Thank you for the replies guys its appreciated. I know I got some demons to work on and the surgery would help. It sucks sometimes knowing no matter how much I workout there's things I cant change. People have told me take the loose skin as a badge of honor, but yet again I want to see and the world to see the fruits of my labor. I have a lot to work on, but truly want to feel comfortable in my own skin one day. I might go up on Deca because my last cycle was: Deca 300mg Test 500mg and EQ 600mg weekly. Would love HGH but stuff is expensive AF and I cant afford it. Did Dbol a long time ago and hated the bloat I looked swollen and didn't keep any of those gains. I'll probably see a shrink some day and work on some issues I have personally.

    I'd like to hear more opinions on cycles though you'd recommend for a guy like me. Sarms , peptides and other gear. I'm really looking to try something else besides Deca but i'm leaning towards it again.
    The picture is of me after Deca and cutting doing keto. I got nice results but under the towel is a mess of skin lol
    You ain't bad bro
    Last edited by Couchlockd; 05-25-2019 at 04:55 PM.

  14. #14
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    its complete horseshit that you "have to deal with the loose skin", all the loose skin is is fat that is extraordinarily hard to lose and I know this because i've dealt with it, you end up in a situation where your metabolism is extremely fucked up and wants to store fat and the only plausible way to lose any more fat at that point involves extreme autophagy stimulating drugs (anything that increases metabolic rate, dnp , amphetamines,clen ) and also extreme stress minimization lol. injectable clen is pretty much good as it gets combined with fasting periods with this issue

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by redz View Post
    Right after 50 or 60 staples removed....
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    Then the comeback
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    The scar is still there but I made it irrelevant. Now I continue to be the best me ever. What’s to come over the next few months will be incredible I’m ready to achieve my dream physique.
    Looking great...
    Was that frim ex stabbing you?
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  16. #16
    valgar007 is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by fiddlesticks View Post
    its complete horseshit that you "have to deal with the loose skin", all the loose skin is is fat that is extraordinarily hard to lose and I know this because i've dealt with it, you end up in a situation where your metabolism is extremely fucked up and wants to store fat and the only plausible way to lose any more fat at that point involves extreme autophagy stimulating drugs (anything that increases metabolic rate, dnp, amphetamines,clen) and also extreme stress minimization lol. injectable clen is pretty much good as it gets combined with fasting periods with this issue
    Hehe it's definitely hard to lose the bf around the loose skin. I don't mess with clen because I thought I was going to die once on it. I've dieted down to 1400 calories and loss too much muscle. Keto works great for me but at the end of the day the skin is still loose. I just got to cut it off that's all.

  17. #17
    XnavyHMCS is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by redz View Post
    Right after 50 or 60 staples removed....
    Click image for larger version. 

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    Then the comeback
    Click image for larger version. 

Name:	AF0CC16D-174F-43D6-B7DF-92983E685FD8.jpg 
Views:	62 
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    The scar is still there but I made it irrelevant. Now I continue to be the best me ever. What’s to come over the next few months will be incredible I’m ready to achieve my dream physique.
    Looking BADASS, bro!!! Right on!!!

  18. #18
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    Looking great...
    Was that frim ex stabbing you?
    No I had pain that couldn’t be explained through X-rays and mris then I ended up in the ER my crappy physician thought I just wanted pain meds. They needed to operate right away due to bowel blockage in the end they didn’t take anything out just ripped me open and stuffed it all back in.

    I was stabbed by my crazy ex but the knife literally just bounced off me somehow and it wasn’t a dull knife lol. Happy to be far from her!
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  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by redz View Post
    No I had pain that couldn’t be explained through X-rays and mris then I ended up in the ER my crappy physician thought I just wanted pain meds. They needed to operate right away due to bowel blockage in the end they didn’t take anything out just ripped me open and stuffed it all back in.

    I was stabbed by my crazy ex but the knife literally just bounced off me somehow and it wasn’t a dull knife lol. Happy to be far from her!
    Well you really are doing awesome!

    That blockage sounds horrible

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by valgar007 View Post
    Hehe it's definitely hard to lose the bf around the loose skin. I don't mess with clen because I thought I was going to die once on it. I've dieted down to 1400 calories and loss too much muscle. Keto works great for me but at the end of the day the skin is still loose. I just got to cut it off that's all.
    I assure you it's not mandatory to get surgery at all, its tens of thousands of times riskier and also more expensive than the drugs would be anyway.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by fiddlesticks View Post
    I assure you it's not mandatory to get surgery at all, its tens of thousands of times riskier and also more expensive than the drugs would be anyway.
    There not anything you can do about having tons of loose skin other than surgery. At a certain point skin loses its elasticity and won’t bounce back no matter how much fat you lose

  22. #22
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    I grew too much.
    It used all my loose skin and now my balls are pernmanently stuck to my shaft.

    I need added skin.
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  23. #23
    valgar007 is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Family_guy View Post
    There not anything you can do about having tons of loose skin other than surgery. At a certain point skin loses its elasticity and wonít bounce back no matter how much fat you lose
    Thank you man. For me to look semi decent I would have to take huge huge doses of gear, probably the same as a pro bodybuilder if not more. I'm 200+ pounds and to fill in my body with 50lbs of added muscle would be a crazy journey. I rather cut off what I can then probable shorten my life span by taking huge doses of gear around the clock. I'm gonna do a bigger cycle of Deca and probably add something else. Not Dbol for sure. Eventually I just want to remain on just a low dosage of trt for my health.
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  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by valgar007 View Post
    Thank you man. For me to look semi decent I would have to take huge huge doses of gear, probably the same as a pro bodybuilder if not more. I'm 200+ pounds and to fill in my body with 50lbs of added muscle would be a crazy journey. I rather cut off what I can then probable shorten my life span by taking huge doses of gear around the clock. I'm gonna do a bigger cycle of Deca and probably add something else. Not Dbol for sure. Eventually I just want to remain on just a low dosage of trt for my health.
    I’d say if your gonna have the surgery then wait to do your cycle/blast. The recovery time might make t hard to hold on to the gains you’ve made
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  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Family_guy View Post
    I’d say if your gonna have the surgery then wait to do your cycle/blast. The recovery time might make t hard to hold on to the gains you’ve made
    Oh Definitely for sure. I'll be doing surgery next year so I got enough time to add 10 pounds of sold gains before then. I know I'll lose a lot after surgery but i'm counting on muscle memory to get my gains back. I'll probably be on trt after the surgery to recover faster. Read there's a few things I can take to recover faster with gear low dosed. I gotta read up before the day comes.
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    Quote Originally Posted by valgar007 View Post
    Oh Definitely for sure. I'll be doing surgery next year so I got enough time to add 10 pounds of sold gains before then. I know I'll lose a lot after surgery but i'm counting on muscle memory to get my gains back. I'll probably be on trt after the surgery to recover faster. Read there's a few things I can take to recover faster with gear low dosed. I gotta read up before the day comes.
    For sure man if it’s not till next year then blast away! You look great in that pic btw. You got more Abs than I do and I’m a skinny dude!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Family_guy View Post
    There not anything you can do about having tons of loose skin other than surgery. At a certain point skin loses its elasticity and won’t bounce back no matter how much fat you lose
    "skin" is extraordinarily thin and that's where people are confused, i assure you it is fixable but incredibly hard due to the metabolic state the body would be in at that point. i didn't have any ridiculous crazy skin hanging or anything but I had to take very extreme measures to tighten and shrink the skin on my stomach

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Obs View Post
    I grew too much.
    It used all my loose skin and now my balls are pernmanently stuck to my shaft.

    I need added skin.

    Well there's a mental picture I didn't need.
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  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by redz View Post
    Right after 50 or 60 staples removed....
    Click image for larger version. 

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Views:	36 
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    Then the comeback
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    The scar is still there but I made it irrelevant. Now I continue to be the best me ever. What’s to come over the next few months will be incredible I’m ready to achieve my dream physique.
    My dad is in hospital facing surgery over blockage. He is like me so he fought it for weeks. Didnt eat for four days at all and very little leading up to it.
    Lost a lot of weight.

    Currently he has a tube down his throat. They are trying to avoid surgery but I know how we are. If he couldn't remove the blockage himself then its not coming out without surgery.
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  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Obs View Post
    My dad is in hospital facing surgery over blockage. He is like me so he fought it for weeks. Didnt eat for four days at all and very little leading up to it.
    Lost a lot of weight.

    Currently he has a tube down his throat. They are trying to avoid surgery but I know how we are. If he couldn't remove the blockage himself then its not coming out without surgery.
    I hope everything goes well with him man. Itís hard to watch your dad go through pain like that. My dad is recovering from a quadruple bypass and a double valve replacement. Never thought Iíd see him go down. Heís coming back better though. Iím sure your dad will too! Good vibes your way man!
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    Don't have the time to read all the answer, but gotta say - WELL F*CKING DONE MAN!! Loosing all that by pure will is awesome. I can honestly say that with that
    mentality to fight as you already have you can accomplish miracles (no joke). You are alrady stronger than 90% of us here.

    My best friend was in the exact same position as you, so I know the struggle from him.
    The operation did a lot for him, but he became a dad and let the body issues go from that and his wife.

    I would do the operation, re-evaluate and then maybe do another one for the fine tuning and possible scars.
    Get a personal trainer who is hard, not the "you do so good" after 2 reps.
    Strict diet that is adjusted for you.
    I don't believe that you need a cycle now since you have it in you already - both mental, physical and TRT.

    Then go travel bro, it will do wonders for your confidence. Not a week all-inclusice, but a mind changing travel for a month or two.
    Go to seminars with e.g. Tony Robbins (I just did....holy fck I wanna have his babies)

    Just my 2 cents
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  32. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by grahamd1 View Post
    I hope everything goes well with him man. It’s hard to watch your dad go through pain like that. My dad is recovering from a quadruple bypass and a double valve replacement. Never thought I’d see him go down. He’s coming back better though. I’m sure your dad will too! Good vibes your way man!
    Thanks man good vibes already got here cuz you live so close I guess

  33. #33
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    Welcome to how every single person on this board have/has felt about there body ...
    Capebuffalo and Family_guy like this.
    ďIf you can't explain it to a second grader, you probably don't understand it yourself.Ē Albert Einstein

    "Juice slow, train smart, it's a long journey."
    BG

    "In a world full of pussies, being a redneck is not a bad thing."
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    Body building is a way of life..........but can not get in the way of your life.
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  34. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by MuscleScience View Post
    Welcome to how every single person on this board have/has felt about there body ...
    Im not depressed with your body.
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  35. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Obs View Post
    Im not depressed with your body.
    If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
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  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Capebuffalo View Post
    If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
    Is MS a hotdog salesman? He really knows how to make a weiner stand.

  37. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Obs View Post
    Is MS a hotdog salesman? He really knows how to make a weiner stand.
    I don’t want anything to come between us. Like clothes.
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  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Capebuffalo View Post
    If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
    I sure would...
    Obs and Capebuffalo like this.
    ďIf you can't explain it to a second grader, you probably don't understand it yourself.Ē Albert Einstein

    "Juice slow, train smart, it's a long journey."
    BG

    "In a world full of pussies, being a redneck is not a bad thing."
    OB

    Body building is a way of life..........but can not get in the way of your life.
    BG

    No Source Check Please, I don't know of any.


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  39. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by MuscleScience View Post
    Welcome to how every single person on this board have/has felt about there body ...
    ....thatís why we here!


    Iím walking into the gym after a 15 minute discussion on why I should just drive home....

    OP - I canít advise you on cycle...and have done every diet....Iím always dieting lol. My very best advice is eat moderate portions of lean protein every meal, fruit and grains early in day and tons of veggies at lunch and dinner with small portions of fat to make them taste good.

    No processed food!

    Once you reach goal and maintain, consider surgery! Always ask what could go wrong bc they like to stress the best case outcome!!!
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