I told my doctor I was on steroids by accident

[TheDreamer]

There was one guy on here who had his own thriving business cutting down trees. He drove to the doctor in his articulated truck, told his doctor he was on steroids, and then on the way home he stopped at a gas station to fill up his tank. He used MasterCard --Payment Declined. He tried his VISA card, payment declined. The taxman made him bankrupt overnight. All his accounts were frozen, and they still remain frozen to this very day. He's buried in the cemetery yonder by the railway tracks.

It is not funny. I asked a serious question.

[Fluidic Kimbo]

It is not funny. I asked a serious question.

Okay then let's get down to business. First we need to rule out the Big 3:

(1) Have you ever murdered anyone?
(2) Have you ever raped anyone?
(3) Have you ever molested a child?

If you haven't ever done any of these 3, then you should be able to mesh neatly back into society (although perhaps with a little turbulence along the way).

If you've done (1), I think you'll need to find a religious community, perhaps born-again Christians or a Hare Krishna commune.

If you've done (2), you're really going to have to search for a forgiving community possessed of great forbearance. Perhaps Bethel church out in California.

If you've done (3), then you only have one choice:

[TheDreamer]

Okay then let's get down to business. First we need to rule out the Big 3:

(1) Have you ever murdered anyone?
(2) Have you ever raped anyone?
(3) Have you ever molested a child?

If you haven't ever done any of these 3, then you should be able to mesh neatly back into society (although perhaps with a little turbulence along the way).

If you've done (1), I think you'll need to find a religious community, perhaps born-again Christians or a Hare Krishna commune.

If you've done (2), you're really going to have to search for a forgiving community possessed of great forbearance. Perhaps Bethel church out in California.

If you've done (3), then you only have one choice:

OMG. You're terrible. It's not amusing at all.